Tag Archives: charlie sheen

The 7 Worst Ever Celebrity Dads

Michael Lohan Arrests
michael lohan
The many arrests of Michael Lohan. Read More »

I’m fully convinced that Michael Lohan’s headline-making domestic violence arrest yesterday was copied straight out of Mel Gibson’s playbook. Of course, Mel’s famed blowouts were uniquely terrible because some of them were directed towards the teenage son of ex-girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva. Last month, Mel paid $100,000 to Oksana’s 14-year-old for the guarantee that he wouldn’t sue the once-respected actor for reportedly “terrorizing” him during altercations with his mother. That’s low, even for Mel Gibson. Additionally, his own toddler daughter with Grigorieva bore witness to a number of her father’s detonations.

It’s hard to top this sh**ty parenting, but surprise, surprise, more than a few celebs come come! After the jump, six more celebrities who I definitely wouldn’t want for a dad.

Morning Quickies: Conan Stares At Nicole Scherzinger’s Boobs & “Two And A Half Men” Breaks Record

  • Conan O’Brien got busted staring at Nicole Scherzinger’s chesticles. [Team Coco]
  • A former Playboy Bunny blasts NBC’s new show “The Playboy Club.” You mean it’s not accurate? Shocking! [Huffington Post]
  • Nicholas Sparks, the man who wrote The Notebook and Dear John, amongst others, is creating a TV show. Get your Kleenex ready! [Videogum]

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Charlie Sheen’s Death On “Two And A Half Men” Will Be A “Meat Explosion”

Ashton Kutcher has just begun shooting his first episode of “Two and a Half Men.” While we already knew that this episode would feature Charlie Harper’s—akaCharlie Sheen‘s—funeral. But we didn’t know how he died. Luckily, TMZ has the answers. Apparently, Charlie had just headed to Paris to elope on the show. And he met his end when he slipped on a subway platform and was hit by an oncoming train. The show apparently implies that his new wife might have given him a little push when she found out he was unfaithful. Furthermore, at his funeral, she calls the accident a “meat explosion.” Which, gross!

But Charlie Sheen isn’t fazed. Keep reading »

Morning Quickies: John Mayer Wants Jennifer Aniston Back & Will Denise Richards Roast Charlie Sheen?

  • John Mayer may be trying to win Jennifer Aniston back because he can’t stand the sight of her happy with Justin Theroux, or something. This is what The National Enquirer says, so it must be true. [Celebitchy]
  • Add Taylor Swift to the list of celebs launching a fragrance: her perfume Wonderstuck has notes of everything from “freesia, green tea, apple blossom, raspberry and dewberry” to “peach and vanilla.” [The Gloss]
  • Kris Jenner is getting a facelift for her daughter Kim Kardashian’s wedding, as you do. [Celebuzz]

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Charlie Sheen’s Former Goddess, Bree Olsen, On The Cover Of Playboy

Rachel Oberlin, aka porn star Bree Olsen, had the good sense to finally ditch Charlie Sheen via text message. But her spot in his pantheon of goddesses has earned her the August cover of Playboy, posing in about 1/5 of a Charlie T-shirt. I also like that she’s both wearing tiger undies and posing with a tiger. Winning! [BuzzFeed]

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Evening Quickies: Weezer Hosting An Indie Rock Cruise & What Sex With Charlie Sheen Is Actually Like

  • Weezer is hosting an “indie rock cruise” from Miami to Cozumel, Mexico, next January! Bands slated to play/re-enact that “Titantic” I’m-king-of-the-world scene include Yuck, Wavves, Free Energy, Sebadoh and Dinosaur Jr. Honestly, Weezer is more “Top 40″ than “indie” at this point, but maybe organizing a Carnival cruise is one of those hipster things, like wearing Hush Puppies, that is so hipster it makes the mainstream indie again? [PopDust]
  • Sarah Jessica Parker is on the cover of Vogue again. Again! [Just Jared]
  • Emma Watson said she had no idea Daniel Radcliffe struggled with alcohol because “as far as I know, he never took a sick day. He was like the most professional, amazing guy ever.” [Us Weekly]
  • Even Richard Simmons is getting in on this planking action. At least, that’s what I think this photo is. [Dlisted]

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10 Ways For “Two And A Half Men” To Kill Off Charlie Sheen’s Character

According to a recent report on TMZ.com, sources close to hit CBS sitcom “Two And A Half Men” are saying that Charlie Sheen’s character on the show, Charlie Harper, will be written off in a way that will keep Sheen from ever returning to the show: he’ll be killed off.

Ashton Kutcher recently signed on to replace Charlie on the show, which resumes filming in August after over six months of being on hiatus since the Sheen walked out and was subsequently fired from the show after he flipped his lid and began “winning,” “warlocking,” “banging seven-gram rocks” and setting his home up as a refuge for porn stars.

But will Charlie’s demise on “Men” be the last we hear from him? Not so, according to recent rumors. Word is, Charlie’s reportedly in talks with TBS to bring a very similar character to the “very funny” network. TBS denies the reports though. Read more… Keep reading »

8 TV Show Concepts For Charlie Sheen

Charlie Sheen may have been ousted from “Two and a Half Men” in favor of Ashton Kutcher. But don’t think for a second that he’s out of the television game. According to insiders, he is thisclose to inking a deal for a comeback show. You know, because he’s been gone for so long. We have no idea exactly what the series will be—beyond that it’s created by Charlie for Charlie—but rumor has it that there will be 10 episodes in the first season. The word on the street is that Sheen is working with Lionsgate TV on the show and that TBS has been the highest bidder so far, only the network claims that isn’t the case and that they aren’t even in discussions. Huh?

Perhaps sometime this week we’ll hear what Charlie has planned for this new show. But in the meantime, we’d like to gift him with eight concepts for his return to the small screen. Keep reading »

Would The Real Charlie Sheen Please Step Forward?

This realistic Charlie Sheen mask took top honors at Maskfest 2011. Now you too can put on this Hyperflesh masterpiece and win at life — well, for a cool $2,500. This is truly frightening. As a sidenote, I really enjoyed the original song, “I’m Gonna Be A Winner,” by Precious Jade Teo. [ONTD] Keep reading »

Denise Richards Promises Her Memoir Won’t Smear Charlie Sheen

“I get into the good stuff about my marriage because people have only gotten the rotten stuff. There was a beautiful love story between us … I went through a lot and I get asked a lot of questions about that time in my life so I figured that I would share my story and, hopefully, anyone that is dealing with challenges will know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. We had one of the worst divorces so if we get into a good place, that’s great.”

Denise Richards shares with reporters what they can expect in her memoir, The Real Girl Next Door, which will be released in late July. Apparently, anyone expecting a smear of Charlie Sheen a la their divorce trial will be sorely disappointed. As will anyone expecting Shakespearean-level writing. [NY Daily News] Keep reading »