Zergnet: Simply Irresistible
Tag Archives: celeb penis
I never thought I’d say this, but I’m officially hot and bothered by one of the Jonas Brothers.
Nick Jonas is all grown up in a new issue of Flaunt Magazine, where the former boy-bander gives us a glimpse at his glorious ass dimples (yes, they’re actually nice, which is weird to me) AND his rather enticing package (which also seems very nice, but I will need further photographic evidence).
In an homage to Mark Wahlberg‘s infamous Calvin Klein ad, Nick stripped down and grabbed his junk wearing nothing but his boxer briefs, and while it looks kind of “college frat bro,” as Amelia says, I wouldn’t kick him out of bed for eating crackers. Hell, I don’t care if he eats a sardine sandwich, because THAT BODY. Keep reading »
5 Seconds Of Summer’s Caleb Hood Sent A SnapChat Of His Dick To A Fan And She Just Couldn’t Keep It To Herself
5 Seconds of Summer is a band that I managed to ignore up until now — but then Calum Hood, a member of the Australian boyband, showed me his dick and I had to take notice. Well, not me specifically, but the internet at large is now familiar with his phallus thanks to the magic of SnapChat. See, Hood — who is 18, BTW — apparently sent a SnapChat video of his junk to a 5SOS fangirl and she, of course, couldn’t wait to brag about it on social media. I don’t use SnapChat because I am an adult who only texts things I stand behind forever, but I thought the whole point was that whatever you send vanishes after a short amount of time? Maybe that’s why Hood was so comfortable unveiling his penis, but he was apparently naive to this fan’s wily ways, because she posted his video on Vine (Caption: CALUMS DICK IM SCREAMING). Hood took to Twitter to casually explain his naughty behavior, saying: “Least ya know what it looks like now,” and then “I’m still just a teenage kid learning from mistakes :).” I was gonna post the Vine after the jump, but the whole “teenage kid” thing — 18 though he may be — is making me feel guilty enough not to. So I’ll just link instead. [Vine via Cosmopolitan]
Jon Hamm does it often and would really prefer we didn’t talk about it, but I have a feeling Scott Disick won’t mind me commenting on his rather obvious bulge as he clearly freeballs while running errands. (I can see dickhead!) Given that our fave bonus Kardashian has dubbed himself a “Lord” and is fond of flaunting his wealth on Instagram, I’m a little surprised this is the first we’re seeing of his, ahem, seemingly large endowment. Perhaps a new Instagram photoshoot — featuring his member surrounded by stacks of cash and wrapped in Rolexes — is in order? [Photos: Splash News]
- Those alleged text messages between Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez are fake, as are the dick pics. Sigh. Of. Relief. [PopBytes]
- Why do rich women have better sex than the rest of us overworked and underpaid ladies? Oh, maybe because they’re not working 50 hours a week and have time to do Pilates every day. Just a guess. [Nerve]
- Zit-popping porn would be a real hit. Now someone just needs to make it. [Em & Lo]
- Men explain why they’re just so over missionary position and all about anal. [Your Tango]
- Penis head puppets are not exactly appropriate for kids’ TV shows. [Huffington Post] Keep reading »
Last night, en route to the Palm Springs International Film Festival, Idris Elba tweeted this reference to his own hard manhood. Women swooned. And men everywhere were like, “I gotta wear bow ties more often.” [Twitter]