In my two-part travel sex episode of Funny Girl Sex Guide, I rather cynically declared that the entire male population of New York City is unfuckable. That, I am willing to admit, was a bit of an exaggeration. Or at least I hope that it is, because I’ve decided that it’s impractical and silly to rely on my relatively infrequent travel schedule as the only opportunity I take to get laid. Therefore, I’m in the market for a fuck buddy, aka someone to sex on the regular without commitment. While I keep my eye peeled for possible candidates, I’m reminding myself, and now you, of six very important rules for having a successful friends with benefits relationship. Watch above!
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BARFFFFFFFFFFFFFF, I hate new sex.
And I know it’s a thing (maybe a sitcom thing?) to bitch about having to do a fake porn moan under the same sweaty, hairy, disgusting meatsack of a pre-corpse you’ve been holding your farts in under for the last five or 10 or 15 years or whatever, but I don’t even care: I WANT THAT.
I’m over the rush of the new; bring on the last dick I’m ever gonna suck. Keep reading »
A new study from Ohio State University in the Journal of Sex Research suggests that casual teenage sex has a reciprocal relationship with poor mental health – and that they contribute to one another over time.
An important thing to note is that this link was found to be the same for both men and women. “That was unexpected because there is still this sexual double standard in society that says it is OK for men to have casual sexual relationships, but it is not OK for women,” said assistant professor of human sciences Claire Kamp Dush, Ph.D. In this sense, it seems that both genders have the same relationship to casual sex — if only pop culture would catch on to that! Keep reading »
Remember the name Benjamin Todd Duddles. He should now be added to every woman’s DO NOT SLEEP WITH LIST. But especially if you live in Waukesha, Wisconsin. In order to get rid of his one-night stand who was “snoring like a train” in his bed, Mr. Duddles called 911 and requested that she be “removed from his bed.”As if one-night stands aren’t precarious enough already. We’ve all been given subtle hints that it’s time to leave the morning after a hookup, but never while we were still asleep. Keep reading »
I have slept with a fair amount of people. But I’ve orgasmed with only one, the person I was in a long-term relationship with. All of my other sexual encounters have been varying degrees of fun, but have not resulted in the Big O. For me at least — the men I’ve slept with always come. This never comes as a surprise to me. I don’t expect to come from casual sex, while I’m sure every dude I have it with does. As Natalie Kitroeff notes in an article for The New York Times, “in hookups, inequality still reigns.”
Here’s what I’ve noticed over, uh, the last 13 years of having sex. Some guys, even random dudes I’ve brought home from bars, are really, really into getting women off. But most of them are driven by their own egos. “Every girl I’ve ever been with has come” is something I’ve heard more than a few times from guys who just won’t stop until they’re sure you’ve reached their idea of satisfaction — orgasm. I’ve been known to fake it with these men, because it’s just so much easier than explaining to a relative stranger “I just can’t orgasm unless I am really, really, really in the right mood and there are no distractions and I’m 1000 percent relaxed and my OCD/ADD isn’t acting up. Also you have to be licking my pussy just right and it also helps if I use my vibrator while you’re fucking me, but even then it just might not happen. Don’t take it personally, I’m still having a great time!” I have given a few dudes the short version of that explanation and they all looked at me like I just killed their puppy. Keep reading »