TODAY IS MY CHRISTMAS.
Two of my all-time favorite things, Carrie Underwood and “The Sound of Music,” are colliding tonight for a live performance on NBC, where my homegirl will be playing the ever-flawless Maria von Trapp. So, naturally my entire day today will consist of hardcore fangirling.
Let this be a warning: If anyone tries to reach me from approximately 8 to 11:30 p.m, you will be unsuccessful, because I will be happily live tweeting through every yodel, every song and every one of Captain von Trapp’s whistles. Join me! Keep reading »
I think everyone who writes about body image has a blind spot or a subject that makes them feel a bit hypocritical. After all, most of us haven’t gotten the whole “Love your body exactly as it is 100 percent of the time no matter what” thing down yet, and although we might have a great understanding of all the concepts, and can easily explain them to others, we haven’t quite internalized them for ourselves. Keep reading »
Dear Fantasy Girlfriend Carrie Underwood,
I want to preface this letter by letting you know that I am not a lesbian, nor do I plan on experimenting with women any time soon. With that said, I would certainly not kick you out of bed. In fact, you’re up there on the “People I’d Gladly Do If They Let Me” list with Paul Walker, Ryan Gosling and Tim McGraw.
While I was watching/sleeping through the CMA Awards last night, I was literally mesmerized by your legs. They’re perfectly toned, bronzed and otherworldly. For a moment, I thought I put my TV on mute, but it was just me—entranced by your limbs. You’ve had killer gams for a long time, but unfortunately, the trainwreck that was the 2013 CMAs, drew even more attention to the only appealing facet of the show other than Luke Bryan: your legs.
And since you exercised the shit out of those bad boys last night, perhaps you should take a seat because this might sting a bit. Here it goes … you sucked. Keep reading »
Did you guys watch the CMA Awards last night? I didn’t get to see the actual show, although according to Katie, I didn’t miss much. But come on, the red carpet fashion is what everyone really cares about, so let’s delve into the sartorial choices of country’s superstars, shall we? Who wins the crown for best color? Whose vintage style is on point? Who is most likely to be mistaken for a Vegas lounge singer? Who seems to be trying really hard to impress your mom? Click through to find out!
Don’t get me wrong. I adore Carrie Underwood. She is one of my favorite singers/performers and I’m secretly kind of excited she’s taking on the role of Maria Von Trapp for a TV movie version of “The Sound of Music” even though most people seem to think this is NBC’s second worst idea ever after greenlighting “Joey.” That being said, the poster for the television spectacle was released yesterday, and there’s something about it that’s, well, a little off. Is it the strangely vacant look in her usually lively eyes? The gaping smile? My confusion about this poster is best expressed in GIF form. Forgive me, Carrie. I just couldn’t resist.