Tag Archives: cake

10 Types Of Customers You Meet While Working In The Whole Foods Bakery

There were a great many things that I enjoyed about working at Whole Foods, particularly in the bakery — not least of all the enthusiastic parents and excited kids, the repeat customers who considered me and my coworkers a sort of tangential social circle, and anyone who was psyched as fuck to get a free cookie (I was profligate with the free cookies). However, because the store markets itself as if it is necessarily moral and responsible to shop there, it also necessarily comes along with some very colorful personalities. I think that some of the people who shopped in the bakery, specifically, had real existential crises: They were in a store that was supposed to be “healthy,” but here they were confronted with fat- and sugar-laden cake! Their brains short-circuited and they became the following people: Keep reading »

Here’s Your New Hobby: Cake Decorating!

I taught myself how to decorate cakes with YouTube videos during a year in which I had a job so boring and soul-draining that, had I not started decorating cakes, I surely would have gone insane. The following year, I got a job decorating cakes, and stuck with it for three years. My training was finished on the job, and with practice I got, well, really, really good.

The point is, decorating a cake like a boss is not that hard. You can do it at home, and you only need a few supplies, time to practice and some patience. I’m going to give you a selection of YouTube videos about the various basic steps of assembling and decorating a cake whose advice I can endorse. Keep reading »

Eat Angelina Jolie’s Face With This Crazy “Maleficent” Cake

Maleficent cake

Angelina Jolie is frightening enough as the evil queen in “Maleficent” but with part of her (red velvet cake) face cut off? Terrifying. Talk about a truly sinful dessert!  [The Kitchn via Tattooed Bakers]

My Cake-Alike, Myself

“Face-to-cake with myself, it’s one of the most surreal feelings I’ve ever experienced,” writes Jill Foster of the Daily Mail. “Yes, it’s narcissistic, but I can hardly take my eyes off ‘me’. Is this how the Queen feels every time a new portrait is unveiled?” 

I didn’t really need to read any further than that. Foster had me at the phrase “face-to-cake with myself.” But naturally, I read on because we’re talking about cake here. Not just cake, cake-alikes, life-sized cake likenesses of human beings. Keep reading »

15 Scary-Ass Halloween Cakes That Look Yucky

scary ass halloween cakes

I have NO IDEA how people are eating these cakes. Some of these images hit a little too close to my sense memory and make me gag. On the other hand, it’s cake and who would ever say no to cake? See 14 more scary-ass Halloween cakes on College Candy

20 Totally Unappetizing Celeb Cake Wrecks

I don’t have much of a sweet tooth, but I enjoy a small slice of cake from time to time. But I am a traditionalist. I prefer my cake to be of the sheet variety, red velvet, chocolate or vanilla, with simple frosting. No doohickies, no weird filling, and most important of all, no huge celebrities heads and faces. I don’t want to eat Snooki’s pouf, or Rihanna’s pursed lips, or Willie Nelson’s braids. Alas, there is a market for highly realistic and unappetizing celeb-inspired cakes. Click through for just a few…

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