Wait, you mean you actually have to exercise to tone your butt? Damn it!
That collective groan you hear are the scads of Reebok EasyTone customers who spent over $100 each on a pair of sneakers that the Federal Trade Commission recently ruled has “deceptively advertised” its customers. The FTC ruled that EasyTone and RunTone brand sneakers had none of the butt-toning abilities advertised and that anyone who bought the faulty sneaks could get a refund. Reebook has agreed to pay a $25 million settlement, although they stand by the tush-boosting claims they’ve made about their shoes.
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Finally, something to do with all that excess fat on your stomach: redirect it to your ass for “the Pippa butt lift.”
Plastic surgery clients now want to emulate the most overrated white girl booty in the world — that of Pippa Middleton, royal maid of honor and scene stealer. “Good Morning America” talked to Miami single mom Christina Valdez, who envied Pippa’s petite waist and poppin’ booty so badly that she went under the knife.
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Getting a tattoo as an homage to your favorite celeb is so 2010. The hot new thing to do is recreate that celeb’s rear end in crumpets. Fifteen thousand crumpets and the manpower from 12 dedicated crumpet-ers honored Pippa Middleton, depicted in her bridesmaid’s gown. Artist Laura Hadland used over 100 jars of Marmite and jam in her ode to Pippa’s patoot after the world’s most famous sister-in-law won a Beefeater Grill contest of women whom Brits would most like to “wake up to breakfast with.”
All I can say is … what a waste of food. [Daily Mail UK] Keep reading »
I am not a picky woman. I haven’t chucked a guy to the curb for being super short or for liberally quoting “Family Guy” without realizing that’s the last recourse of the unoriginal. I try to accept men with all their imperfections. Even the guy who always referred to my butt as a “tush” in bed. Keep reading »
If you have opened a magazine or looked at a billboard anytime in the past few months, you have heard of Levi’s new Curve ID jeans. Last summer, Levi’s launched a new fit system for their denim based on a woman’s body shape, instead of her size. The company performed body scans of 60,000 women around the world and identified three main body types — “slight curve,” “demi curve,” and “bold curve” — which fit 80 percent of women. Exciting news, right? Keep reading »
In a “creative” new advertising campaign — really, they used the word “creative” — Kentucky Fried Chicken is giving college girls $500 bucks to walk around campus wearing sweat pants that promote their Double Down sandwich across the ass. It’s a bun-less sandwich and the co-ed girls have the words “double down” across their … oh, nevermind, you get it. Shh, let’s not tell them that Victoria’s Secret and just about every college in the country has beat them to this idea!
KFC is pleased to have found so many
broke college kids wannabe billboards willing to be exploited take monetary compensation for being objectified and ogled their time … Keep reading »
Levi’s is selling new Curve ID jeans in three different versions: a “slight curve,” a “demi curve,” and a “bold curve.” The sizes in the various versions basically range from 2 to 14 (although I’m aware sizes are completely and non-sensically different from company to company.) The tag line for the ad campaign is “All asses are not created equal.” The models are three light-skinned women who appear to be Caucasian. Although “curviness” is relative, none of them are curvy in the way, say, J.Lo, Beyoncé, or Crystal Renn is curvy.
To some it’s just an ad campaign for “curvy” jeans. To others, it’s racist and sexist advertising. Keep reading »