This week, I got a letter from a woman who’s worried she doesn’t know her own strength:
“I’m finally seeing a new guy regularly and he’s great, but we’re having a major issue in the bedroom department. I’ve always had glowing reviews before, and this new guy and I are definitely compatible, but sometimes we have to stop because somehow I’ve … bent his penis? The last time it happened, I had already orgasmed, but he was telling me he might not be able to (another really frustrating problem, but a more manageable one — he said he was tired). Anyway, he pulled out too far mid-thrust and then instead of going straight back in there, he got off track and ended up smushing himself against me and hurting himself! This has happened before but I thought it was due to dryness, so we added lube and things were fine for a while, but it’s happened since and dryness was not to blame. I’m not sure if I’m doing something wrong or what, but I’m starting to get concerned and I don’t want him to be disappointed and writhing in pain every time we have sex! It doesn’t happen every single time, but it’s enough that it’s a problem. Please help me!”
Oh girl, this is an emergency! Here’s how you can play doctor.
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Okay, mon, so this one really blew my mind. There’s this new dance craze in Jamaica called “daggering”—check out a very G-rated version in this Mr. Vegas video so aptly entitled “Daggering.” Basically, imagine a dude using his erect penis as a…er…dagger and trying to stab it into unaccommodating places on a woman’s body (i.e. anything but a hole). Um…basically simulating sex. Some geniuses are taking this craze into the bedroom—same idea only this time, they’re getting injured. Bending the penis when it’s at attention can cause it to fracture. The guys get a sudden, sharp pain and then their thing gets black and blue. Doctors in Jamaica are freaking out because the number of penis fractures in the country has tripled. As a result, government officials have banned any type of media promoting daggering.
Sheesh, until recently — thanks “Grey’s Anatomy”! — I didn’t even know penises could break. Warning dudes: always exercise caution with your dagger. [Newsweek]
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On last night’s episode of “Grey’s Anatomy,” a show I don’t watch, but might have to, given this particular plot twist, Dr. McSteamy broke his ween. What? You can break a penis? You sure can! Back in college I wrote a sex column for my college paper, called “Ask Betty X” and I answered this very question. So well, in fact, that I am just going to refer to my 21-year-old alter ego’s thoughts on the matter, after the jump… Keep reading »