As a Scorpio, I’m loyal to a fault. That’s why, even though it’s been 11 years since they broke up and they both have significant others and probably nothing in common anymore, I am still praying for Justin Timberlake and Britney Spears to get back together. Sorry, Jessica Biel. Nothing personal. It’s just that, in 2000, when I doodled “Britney N Justin 4 Eva” in my notebook instead of paying attention in Lit Theory 101, I meant it. FOREVER. And maybe Justin did too, if a far-reaching analysis of a hidden track on the second part of The 20/20 Experience is to be believed. Keep reading »
Yesterday on “Good Morning America,” Britney Spears arrived in a helicopter, hovering above a sea of fans holding cards that formed a 10-story likeness of the pop icon. So what if she arrived having just puked, wearing no shirt and too sick to do a proper interview? The point was that she had an important announcement to make and she needed to do it in style. That’s right … Britney Jean Spears is coming to Vegas, bitches! After rumors and suspicious tweets, the pop star confirmed that she’ll be doing a two-year residency at Planet Hollywood in Sin City. “Britney: Piece of Me” will debut on December 27th. Obviously, what The Frisky wants for Christmas is a group of front-row tickets to her first show. SANTA … PLEASE!? Or Brit’s publicist?? Once we heard the news, we immediately started casting, choreographing and sequencing her Vegas extravaganza. In case anyone on her team is reading, here are a few of our initial requests for “Piece of Me,” along with some of our favorite Britney GIFs. Just because. [Washington Post] Keep reading »
Britney Spears fans, rejoice! (That’s me! I’m rejoicing! Love Britney!) The singer’s first new single in awhile (okay, excluding that meh song she did for the Smurfs movie) leaked online well in advance of its expected Monday night release. “Work Bitch” is pretty basic lyrically — surprising, I know — and seems to be mostly about Britney’s newly returned work ethic. Or something. Whatever. It’s a total club banger and I am now even more excited for Brit’s next album of songs I can pretend to strip to in the privacy of my bedroom.
I’m not sure why comedian and blogger Francesca “Chescaleigh” Ramsey — who you’ll remember for her “Shit White Girls Say To Black Girls” and “Olivia Pope’s ‘Scandal’ Makeup Tutorial” videos — was inspired to imitate Britney Spears covering Beyonce’s “Grown Woman,” but I’m glad she did. Uncannily hilarious. [YouTube]
Justin Timberlake is back! I mean, he never really left, right? But he’s back in original JT form, as a singing dude, with a Not At All Contractually Obligated record, The 20/20 Experience. “Suit and Tie” and “Mirrors” (which I think sounds like terrible ’90s era boy band soft rock) are both blowing up the airwaves, and he’s also on the new Jay Z record, so therefore, he’s everywhere at the moment. But you didn’t think we forgot about Justin Timberlake’s long pop culture history, did you? Or the fact that he owns a small soul food restaurant chain (aptly named Southern Hospitality). Plus, he’s got another restaurant named Destino to keep him warm.
After the jump, eight more things you may have forgotten (intentionally or otherwise) about Justin Randall (!) Timberlake:
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Jamie Lynn Spears, younger sister of Britney, tweeted something vaguely ominous to Justin Timberlake — and then deleted it. She posted a photo of her, JT, and Brit Brit in a car, while alluding to knowing that his song “Cry Me A River” was written about her sister. Thankfully someone screencapped it before it was lost into the vortex of time. Read more on Evil Beet Gossip…
Just when you think you’ve come to the end of the Internet, the web up and births you a brand new baby for you to coo over. And that baby is called Actresses Without Teeth, a blog devoted to photoshopping out the chompers of major celebrities. Surprisingly, it kind of works for some of them, like Anne Hathaway, whose large lips, one imagines, might be wholly capable of gumming up some snacks. But oh, the horror of Britney Spears sans teeth? Well, I’ll let you see for yourself. [Actresses Without Teeth]
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So, Britney Spears is no longer engaged to that dude she was engaged to, and obviously the only logical response is the one People chose, which is to lament the end of Britney’s “fairy tale.” Because all weddings are fairy tales, and literally any man a woman can be engaged to has got to be Prince Charming?
I bet Britney Spears is really sad that she’s not getting married, but I’m also not going to assume that she might not also be a little bit relieved. It sounds like that guy was not a particularly good match for her. Sounds like they made the right decision here. What’s sadder than a broken engagement? A divorce. What’s sadder than a divorce? Staying in a bad marriage until you die.
It’s okay to end your engagement. It’s okay to end it if you just bought a gazillion dollar ring. It’s okay to end it if you’ve put a $10,000 deposit down on a rooftop venue. It’s okay to end it if you’re literally opening the doors to the courthouse. This is not something we say to people. But it’s true. Keep reading »