“It’s so bizarre that people are constantly asking if my breasts are real or fake. They’re so obviously real that anyone who’s ever seen or touched a breast would know.”
— Christina Hendricks is in the unenviable position of repeatedly answering questions about her boobs. But she’s also in the enviable position of having Christina Hendricks’ boobs, so that about evens out, right? [Daily Mail UK]
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Ah, boobs. On a good day they look gorgeous, make us feel womanly and sexy, and perhaps even feed a baby. But on a bad day, they’re sensitive to the touch, totally difficult to keep under wraps, and amongst the more well-endowed ladies, give us an aching back. I have average-sized boobs myself, but I’ve heard many a big-breasted lady say again and again that her boobs are killing her. Plenty of women even undergo breast reduction surgery.
With that in mind, here’s something I’ll never understood: the small group of women with with cup sizes in the middle reaches of the alphabet, who vie for the title of “world’s largest breasts.” Keep reading »
Wondering what would your breasts look like if they were bigger? There’s an app for that! iAugment is a Photoshop-style iPhone app that uses a 3D pic of your chest to show you how you’d look with bigger jigglies. iAugment allows you to view 17 different breast implant sizes — from “Blake Lively goes softcore” to “Sheyla Hershey circus boobs.” (Just kidding, they’re not really called that.) Created by plastic surgeon Elizabeth Kinsley from New Orleans, the iAugment app claims to help women decide if they really want a boob job. In reality, I think we all know that
14-year-old boys every adult man we know is going to digitally play with their lady friend’s boobs on iAugment ad nauseum. Amiright, boys? [Daily Mail UK] Keep reading »
File under: Problems we didn’t even know we could have. The La Decollette bra doesn’t look like a normal bra. It’s built with the bra cups cut out, and a wide swathe of fabric running up the middle of your chest. And you don’t wear it when you’re out and about — it’s to be worn at night, as a way of preventing something called “cleavage wrinkles.” Cleavage wrinkles are caused when your girls are pushed together too much in an uncontrolled way, so the La Decollette is supposed to manage their spacing while you sleep. Now that that problem’s solved, can we move on to finding a solution for hat head? [La Decollette] Keep reading »
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Those Russians are always giving us a run for our money. Our D-cup average is not enough to stand up to their giant Russian racks! And China is officially the new world head quarters for the Itty-Bitty Tittty Committee. I shall pack my things and head to where I breast belong. Keep reading »
A little girl may have only stopped nursing a few years ago herself, but that’s no reason she can’t play mama to a Breast Milk Baby, right? The $89 doll by Berjuan Toys shows girls — and yes, this doll is by default for girls — how to nurture their babies by breastfeeding from their, um, breasts. To nurse their dolls, little girls put on a “magic top” with a flower stickers over the breasts, pull their baby’s mouth up to the flowers, and watch as the doll starts to “suckle and swallow.” The press release trills:
“The Breast Milk Baby lets young girls express their love and affection in the most natural way possible, just like mommy. The Breast Milk Baby represents a revolution in design by teaching children the nurturing skills they’ll need to raise their own healthy babies.”
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Big fake titties? American politicians can’t get enough of ‘em. But Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez is firmly anti-breast implants. Speaking on a United Nations summit on great racks a state-run television station, Chavez railed against plastic surgeons who “convince some women that if they don’t have some big bosoms they should feel bad.” Chavez added that some women in Venezuela, where the breast implant business is booming, will get plastic surgery even if they’re struggling to make ends meet, which he called a “monstrous thing.” Hmm, I guess the president is not a fan of Venezuelan beauty pageants, then.
The Frisky called the White House for a comment on Obama’s stance on fake boobs. We have yet to hear back by press time. [TIME] Keep reading »
Meh. I’m with Facebook on this one. Keep reading »
There was supposedly a study done in Germany where men were instructed to refrain from looking at boobies for five years while others were encouraged to ogle for at least 10 minutes a day. The ones who boob gazed were found to have lower heart rates and lower blood pressure. While I happily support a little inconspicuous breast worship every now and then, this study has to be a joke. Are we sure this wasn’t an Onion piece that got misinterpreted by some doofuses at FOX? Who were the men who agreed to go five years without looking at boobs? Clearly they were gay, total masochists, or complete liars. [Buzzfeed
UPDATE: And, lo and behold, this story is indeed a hoax. Apparently, it’s an internet scam that originated in 1999 and resurfaced for another go-round this week. [Business Insider] Keep reading »