The world laughed when Heidi Montag said that she felt like she was trapped in her own body because of her enormo breast implants. But I totally understand what she’s talking about.
At 25, I had lost a large amount of weight and my body fat percentage was drastically reduced in a short period of time. This worked wonders for my ass, but wreaked havoc on my chest. I remarked to my girlfriends one night after a few too many drinks that I had tiger nipples. This description, complete with claws and roaring noises, was a reference to the stretch marks that cut deep swaths in my once firm skin. I was in an unhealthy relationship at the time and at the urging of my partner, I decided to do something about my prematurely sagging breasts. Keep reading »
It’s no secret that Americans are getting fatter each decade (obesity rates have doubled since 1980), but the news isn’t all bad. The upside to our bigger waistlines? Bigger bustlines to go with them! In fact, in the last ten years, the median bra size in the U.S. has grown from 36C to 36DD! And thanks to Oprah and her Bra Fit Interventions, more women than ever are getting sized and wearing the correct bra, which in this age of big boobs, means the full-figured bra business is booming (sales of bigger bras increased 7.4 percent from 2008 to 2009). The only problem is that supply has yet to keep up with demand. Says Susan Nethero, who runs a lingerie shop called Intimacy: “Full-figure bras have sold far faster and larger than average-size bras. Full-busted sales have grown by at least 10 percent over the past year, and 74 percent of my bra business is now with cup sizes larger than DD. I wish there were more. We are not getting enough new [full-figured] product.” That roar you just heard is the sound of curve-loving men (and women) everywhere cheering their hearts out. [via NYmag.com] Keep reading »
A Japanese “scientist” claims he has composed a breast enhancing ringtone. According to Hideto Tomabechi, a woman can increase the size of her breasts in only 10 days if she listens to the ringtone 20 times every 24 hours. Sounds easy, but don’t get too excited just yet. The ring tone apparently has many layers of sound to stimulate breast tissue growth, but the predominate clamor is a baby shrieking. Actually, don’t get too excited period, as this seems to be one of the biggest/funniest cons in YouTube history. Watch this video to learn more about the “grow-your-boobs” ringtone, “convince-the-fat-from-your-butt-to-leave” ringtone, and something involving the Japanese police and cults. Keep reading »
Martina started posting photos of her naked breasts on her blog “Will They Grow?” (obviously NSFW) last week, in order to chart their growth now that she’s on birth control. After the jump, she tells us why and what she hopes to see happen. Keep reading »
Throughout the ages women have gone to great pains to get showstopping and eye-dropping cleavage. The corset was rough, stuffed-toilet paper bras were prone to discovery and the push-up bra is just a bit too obvious. According to the peeps from My Beautiful Breasts, however, your cleavage woes are over. This kit ain’t just your average bra-filling and lifting, ladies. We are talking about painting on your boobies, or lack thereof.
We’ve scene this trick before: use makeup to create contours on our bust line the same way we use bronzer to fake sharper cheekbones or those weird airbrushing techniques that create faux six-pack abs. Except, this ain’t just a wish of bronzer we are talking about. Eye shadow and blush come off pretty easy, but the bust stain can stay on for up to five days! And, maybe I am just bitter because I can’t draw a stick figure, but painting-on your boobies sounds pretty complicated and complex. Chances are I would mess it up and have some pretty busted looking buhbies for a week.
I think I’ll just stick to toilet paper, thank you very much. [$69, My Beautiful Breasts Kit, ItCosmetics.com]
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