Holy moley, were there a lot of boob stories in 2014! You’d think that between #BreakTheInternet and “Anaconda,” this year would go to butts, but you’d be wrong. We learned a lot about Dolly Parton’s boobs, Free the Nipple became part of the feminist movement, and Jasmine Tridevil beguiled us all. Click through to see the best of this year’s boob news!
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A woman in Germany robbed a pharmacy by squirting breast milk into the cashier’s eye, taking cash from the till, and running off.
Again: A woman in Germany robbed a pharmacy by squirting breast milk into the cashier’s eye, taking cash from the till, and running off.
This is obviously the best boob-related news item in recent history, beating out even Tri-Boob. There’s so much to love about it — I mean, just picture in your head being at Walgreens. You’re waiting in line to pick up your prescription. The woman ahead of you is ostensibly buying a breast pump. You happen to glance up from your phone just as the woman takes her boob out of her shirt, aims it at the cashier, and squeezes breast milk into his or her face. Boob still out, she grabs $100 (it was Euros, obviously, but work with me here) from the cash register, then bolts, resettling her boob into her shirt as she runs out the door. She leaves the breast pump on the counter. Keep reading »
Amelia Boomker, a 36-year-old Illinois mom, has donated more breast milk than any other woman in the world. The mom of four boys — Danny, Liam, Ryan and Connor — is now a Guinness World Record holder, having pumped 16,321 fluid ounces of milk since 2008. That equates to 41 two-liter bottles of soda or 4,000 baby bottles. Keep reading »
Over a year ago, I was helping a friend out on a screenplay about a guy who uses his wife’s breast milk to make fancy pants dessert. What a ridiculous premise, hahaha, right? Well, maybe not entirely. A sweets company in Austin called Lollyphile has come out with a breast milk-flavored lollipop for $2.50 each. The lollipops are actually vegan, which means they aren’t actually made with real human breast milk, but real human breast milk was used by “flavor specialists” in order to create the faux flavoring. ”We are endlessly grateful to all the mothers who kept sharing their breast milk with our flavor specialists until we were able to candify it,” Lollyphile’s website says. Listen, I’ve tasted breast milk before — yes, as a baby, but also as an adult — and it kind of just tastes like watery almond milk. Meh. I’ll stick with Tootsie Pops. But what about you? [Lollyphile via Eater]
Strands from baby’s first haircut. The first tooth. Tiny footprints sunk into clay. Some parents even tuck away the dried stump of the umbilical cord or the stick pregnancy test as a touching memento marking the milestones of their kids. The latest? Breast milk jewelry, on sale at the handmade marketplace Etsy. Few issues polarize mothers more than breast-feeding, and all things related to breast-feeding, so wearing processed breast milk around the neck or in a bracelet has ignited some passions. Read more on Newser…
Raise your hand if you were surprised that Kim Kardashian got a facial from her own blood. Grossed out? Yes. Surprised? No. Because Kim’s syringe-wielding skincare routine was just the latest example in a Kardashian family past time: playing with their own body fluids. This family will have none of your conventions of “taste” or “hygiene.” Strap on your latex gloves and join me for a stroll down memory lane.