As I stood in the small studio on Manhattan’s Upper West Side, attempting a sexy pout for the camera, I felt my fears and inhibitions melting away. Posing for boudoir photos was the most fun I’d had in months. The real me, who I’d been stifling for reasons I hadn’t even begun to understand, had started to find her way back to the surface. Any thoughts that I wasn’t cute enough for this, wasn’t confident enough for this, wasn’t anything enough for this, began to fade away. I guess I’d thought that photo shoots like this were for other people, not me. Turns out that was the biggest lie I’d ever told myself. I wasn’t about to waste any more time feeling inadequate or not being incredibly proud of the person I was.
This experience, like so many bold decisions, started with an epic breakup. A big thing I realized when that relationship ended was that I had stopped trying new things or leaving my comfort zone. I was flat-out uninspired. I felt incredibly unsexy, and not necessarily in just a physical way. My spirit, at that point, was what could only be described as gray and lumpy. My trademark giddy energy was gone because I couldn’t remember the last time I’d learned something new or exciting. I’d forgotten how many adventures life had to offer. Keep reading »
Anyone who’s ever had their heart broken can tell you that shit hurts way more deeply and intensely than a stubbed toe or sprained ankle. This video by AsapScience explains the various scientific factors (Brain activity! Evolution!) that come together to create the very real pain of heartbreak. Fascinating stuff. Next I’m looking forward to science proving that a pint of Ben & Jerry’s is the one true cure, because based on my extensive field work, it totally is. [YouTube via Laughing Squid]
See that red, squiggly thing on Sinead O’Connor’s cheek that looks like a toddler doodled on her with a pen? That’s her new face tattoo and it’s not actually a squiggle. It’s the initials BQ, which stands for Brendan Quinlan. Remember how Sinead started blogging about being single and considering having sex with a yam and then she met someone and married him for 16 days? Well, Brendan Quinlan is not that guy. He’s someone else. At a performance last week, she told the audience that she got her new ink to remind the guy that betrayed her. Then she put up a post on her website that said:
“Face Tattoo…Brendan Quinlan.. ‘It’s what it is’.. Un ange passe ; ) There’s a bottle of Agent Provocateur in someone’s room that belongs to me.”
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“It’s not you, it’s me.” How many times have you heard that? How many times have you comforted a heartbroken friend by telling them that there’s nothing wrong with them, they just happen to have picked a poor partner? How many times have you thought that for yourself?
Here’s a hard truth to learn: Sometimes it really is you. Keep reading »
I remember reading a really thought provoking post on here a few months back about “ghosting”. At the time I was like, “YES! YES! Mental hugs to this author because she is describing my life and the lives of my friends’ and even the life of my dog probably!” So basically the situation with ghosting is that you’ll be talking to a guy…you know – “talking to”/hooking up with/so on and so forth…and then he just disappears. POOF! Into thin air, the guy you thought you had a connection with totally up and vanishes. Read more at College Candy…
Exes, right? They’re all oozing out of the ground like primordial sludge when you date them, and then suddenly, after you break up, they become fully functioning human beings! How does that work? If you, like me, have a few exes that you met while they were clawing their way up into real-personhood, you’re probably amazed by some of the changes they’ve gone through since you guys were together. Was your time with them in any way responsible for their radical transformation? Have they progressed? Regressed? Become totally awesome or incredible shits? After the jump, we catalog some of the ways our exes got their lives together after, much after, we broke up.
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