Have you ever dealt with a serial upstager? A one-upping, attention-grabbing, spotlight-stealing individual who never quits? Have you forgotten what it feels like to tell a story about work/the crazy man outside of your apartment/that time you were in Africa teaching kids to read and write/anything in its entirety? Have you’ve become all too comfortable sitting on the sidelines during family gatherings while this individual entertains aunts and uncles with tales of her days spent disciplining inner-city kids that are so absurd they definitely border on the untrue? Well, I have. And if you have, too … you know that it really sucks. Keep reading »
When women brag on Facebook about having the “best hubby in the world,” I want to buy advance tickets and popcorn to their inevitable divorce. If you really and truly love your husband and you’re actually that happy, why do you need to show off? Is Facebook your own personal delusion billboard?
Like when did husbanding (as opposed to husbandry, something else entirely) become a competition in which your husband is suddenly The Greatest Of All Husbands simply because he exchanged paper money for shiny baubles or, I don’t know, fixed the shower head? And why do you need to send out a massive brag to your “friends”? If it’s such a big deal, can’t you just tell them over the phone or in person? Keep reading »
I have this weird habit. Despite being very uncomfortable talking about money in almost every other scenario, whenever someone compliments me on something I’m wearing, I immediately blurt out how much I paid for it, but only in cases when I’ve gotten a great deal. For example, while walking my dog this morning, I ran into my neighbor, who complimented my yellow dress.
“Thank you! It’s actually Club Monaco, but I got it at Buffalo Exchange [a resale mini-chain] for $20!” I blurted out. Oops. Homegirl didn’t ask me where I got it, let alone for how much, so why did I tell her? The thing is, I do this all the time.
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My female friends (both of them) have asked me in the past whether guys are as prone to kissing and telling as women. It’s a tough question, because I don’t know how often women talk about men they’ve become romantically involved with (though my guess would be “constantly”) or what level of detail you use. I do know that sex and romance aren’t topics that men typically avoid in conversation with one another. Keep reading »