• The father of Michael Jackson’s eldest children is Arnold Klein, Jackson’s L.A.-based dermatologist and Rowe’s former boss. [Us Weekly]—I hope he got a package deal—skin lightener with a side of sperm.
• Stephen Moyer, Bill Compton on “True Blood,” says he has introduced girlfriend and co-star Anna Paquin to boxing, and she really enjoys the blood. [People]—Sounds a lot like Sookie Stackhouse.

First he went on a couple dinner dates with Jen Aniston—who, according to tabloid reports, has finally deemed him a big enough star to date—and now he’s cavorting with Renee Zellweger. YAWN. [NYC, 6/30/09]

The two best parts: 1) when Bradley Cooper’s character tells Scarlett Johansson’s character that they’re just friends, and she strips and jumps into the pool, and 2) the scene with Drew Barrymore and the answering machine—I don’t even know any guys who are that fake thoughtful.