Though they’re currently known for their huge brood and inhumanely good looks, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have yet again decided to change up everyone’s perceptions. Please meet Mr. and Mrs. Jolie-Pitt, jewelry designers. Yup, we’ve got another celebrity designer in the world, but this time it sort of makes sense. They’ve decided to create a capsule collection called The Protector for Asprey, all based on a snake. Angie’s known for her devotion to kids who are in less fortunate situations, so all net proceeds are going to the Education Partnership for Children of Conflict, which Angelina co-founded. “These are the children who most need a safe place to learn, a place to heal, a place to learn reconciliation, a place to build a better future and a place — to just be children,” said Angelina. “Yet the education for these children is often forgotten. Tens of millions of children and adolescents in conflict are not in school.”

Brad Pitt, eternally hot actor and father of 1,000 children, has been rocking a rather bohemian-looking beard thingy for a while now. Usually I am willing to give BP the benefit of the doubt, style- and grooming-wise, but now things have gone too far. At a recent press event Brad was spotted with little beads woven into his beard fur, as if he was channeling Johnny Depp’s “Pirates of the Caribbean” character. Here’s the thing Brad: Johnny was actually in all three of those movies, so he’s the only one who’s allowed to take the look home with him at night, OK? Shave it. Just shave it.

The ‘80s. Male strippers. What more could a girl ask for? Variety says director Tony Scott (“Top Gun,” “True Romance”) has signed on to direct a movie about Steve Banerjee, who created the male stripper phenomenon that is the Chippendales. Banerjee started out pumping gas and ended up the uber-wealthy head of the dudes-in-thongs phenomenon. Ultimately, he fell from his lofty male stripper pedestal when he hired a hit man to take out his choreographer over a contract dispute, and then died in jail while awaiting trial. It’s “Footloose” meets “Flashdance” meets “Showgirls” meets “Goodfellas”! I can hardly wait. Here’s hoping Brad Pitt signs on to star as Banerjee. [Variety]

Seen so rarely that we sometimes think they might have been just a figment of our imagination, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie’s twins, Knox and Vivienne, were photographed with their parents in Amman, Jordan this weekend. [Twitter via DListed]

Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel are reportedly donezo. Though nothing has been officially confirmed and the couple was seen together earlier this week, it would be a slightly shocking breakup, mostly for the alleged claim that Rihanna is JT’s other woman. After three years of on-again, off-again for Jessica and Justin, all it took was some sightings with the feisty singer to launch a truckload of rumors. [Terra] Though they might not be over IRL, it reminded us of some other shocking celebrity breakups!

Nerve.com recently interviewed Spencer Pratt and learned the reality TV “star” has a lot sex and relationship advice to dole out. When asked what Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie could learn from his successful relationship, he replied:

I think that since their relationship was founded on infidelity, their structure, their foundation is always going to be impossible. She’s always going to be thinking, “Wait. You already did this to Jen. Are you gonna do this to me?” Thank God I don’t live that life, because I don’t see how you can keep that marriage together. Personally, if I got together with my wife after cheating on my last wife, I’d definitely think my wife is a shady little hussy who could be cheating on me any time.

Spencer Pratt is a way better man than Brad Pitt, see, because instead of basing his marriage on infidelity, he’s based it on inauthenticity and an appalling lack of depth. [via Nerve]

Even former President Bill Clinton can’t resist Brad Pitt’s charms. The two were yucking it up at the Clinton Global Initiative conference. Guess some dudes are lucky enough to find true bromance, without Craigslist’s help. [New York City, 9/25/09]

I cannot wait for the day I get to mail my grandma this Someecards note.  Brad Pitt, I love you, even with a goatee. That’s how I know it’s for real….

• Rumor has it, Brad Pitt will arrive in London tomorrow to begin shooting the role of Moriarty in Guy Ritchie‘s “Sherlock Holmes.” This means the film’s release will be pushed back to 2010. But the film’s producers told Us Weekly that this report is false, and the flick is on schedule for a December 2009 release. We know where we stand—Jude Law, Robert Downey Jr. and Brad! This trifecta would definitely help Guy atone for his recent theater bombs.

Brad Pitt stopped by the set of “Real Time” Friday night and chatted with Bill Maher about his pro-gay marriage, pro-pot, and anti-religion stance. “What is it you don’t like about religion?” Maher asked.

“You know, I grew up in a religious family, in a religious community and it just doesn’t make sense to me. It just doesn’t work for me in the long run,” Pitt said. “I never wanted to step on anyone else’s religion and their beliefs—that’s what’s great about our country—until I started seeing it defining policy. ... Like gay marriage, you have a group of people telling other people how to live their lives, and you can’t do that.”

Since Hurricane Katrina, Brad Pitt‘s “Make it Right” foundation has helped so many New Orleans residents that folks are calling for him to run for mayor. Pitt says he doesn’t have a chance, explaining he’s running on the “gay marriage, no religion, legalization and taxation of marijuana platform.” Besides, politics isn’t his strong suit: “It’s not what I do best.” Looking good in a suit is. After the jump, actors-turned-politicians whose careers could give him some guidance in getting elected.

If the weekly tabs aren’t accusing Angie and Brad of breaking up, the rumors are that they’re expecting. This week, the buzz is that Angelina’s showing signs she might be pregnant. The evidence? At the Inglourious Basterds premiere in L.A. on Monday night, her arms didn’t look like the sticks they normally do! Also, she was “bubbly, fun and ... nice.” When is Angelina ever nice? When she’s pregnant, duh! Despite looking nothing but trim in a sexy, black leather dress — a typical old-school Angie getup — she sent tongues a-wagging when she skipped the champagne while Brad enjoyed his beer all night.

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie put on their tough personas for the “Inglourious Basterds” premiere. We really love Angelina’s leather tube dress because we just can’t get enough of dresses with pockets. And Brad looks sexy, as usual. [LA, 8/10/09]

“I have love in my life, a soul mate—absolutely. When someone asked me why Angie and I don’t get married, I replied, ‘Maybe we’ll get married when it’s legal for everyone else.’ I stand by that, although I took a lot of flak for saying it—hate mail from religious groups. I believe everyone should have the same rights. They say gay marriage ruins families and hurts kids. Well, I’ve had the privilege of seeing my gay friends being parents and watching their kids grow up in a loving environment.”

“[The grotto behind the waterfall behind his L.A. house] is a great place for having sex.”

—Brad Pitt in Parade [DListed]

What’s the deal with actors doing interviews in character? Not that I’m complaining, because I find it generally hilarious, but why are we seeing so much of this lately? A few weeks ago, we had the pleasure of seeing Mark-Paul Gosselar reviving the teen-tastic role of Zack Morris on “Late Night with Jimmy Fallon.” Then, of course, the past two weeks have been filled with Sacha Baron Cohen as Bruno taking over every talk show ever. And this week we’ve come across the latest issue of Wired in which Brad Pitt talks as his character from “Inglourious Basterds.” As much as I’ve enjoyed these interviews, I feel a bit like the celebs are cheating me and every tabloid lover out of learning their juicy personal details. Do you agree, or do you like these interview stunts?

In the August issue of Wired starring Brad Pitt’s aging face, the actor gives advice—in his “Inglourious Basterds” character—on a few topics close to our hearts: dating, porn, texting, and World of Warcraft. And, while we don’t support the wearing of Bluetooth headsets in public, his advice ain’t bad.

He looks quite handsome, though who knows why he’s on the cover but we hope it sells better than that hateful Julia Allison issue.

We have to admit, the gold helmet and gloves are an awesome way to accessorize your mid-life crisis. Hey Brad, is that motorcycle big enough for two?  [Hollywood, 7/8/09]

In April, Brad Pitt taped a commercial with a sumo wrestler, and now it’s out. Brad plays the assistant to a sumo wrestler in this Spike Jonze-directed ad for Japanese SoftBank, a telecommunications company. We think the commercial is probably trying to say, “We’ll support you no matter what, even if we have to do the seemingly impossible, like carry a 300+ pound man when his flip-flop breaks.”