Tag Archives: boyfriend

The 9 Stages Of A Drunk Boyfriend (In GIFs!)

The 9 Stages Of A Drunk Boyfriend (In GIFs!)

We have all been there. A casual happy hour turns into a dark, drunken blur where one can’t remember how many or what type of alcohol has been consumed. We all pay the price. But no one is more predictable than the Drunk Boyfriend. The men in our lives who behave so uniquely in our daily lives turn into the same man when wasted. The predictability of each stage of a boyfriend’s intoxication is almost comforting. Keep reading »

Girl Talk: On Lying About Having A Boyfriend

No More Nice Guys!
cartoon nice guy
How to tell if you're a "nice guy" and how to stop being one. Read More »
Shaming "Nice Guys"
nice guys of OK Cupid
All about the Nice Guys Of OK Cupid Tumblr. Read More »
Ask Almie: Love Letter
How not to write one, based on a letter Almie once wrote. Read More »
Girl Talk: On Lying About Having A Boyfriend

Two days ago, I lied about having a boyfriend. I don’t do this, ever. This is one of those things I do not like to do. I do not want to feel like I have to lie about having a boyfriend to get out of an uncomfortable situation. Before I get to this story, here is an example of a situation in which I could have lied about having a boyfriend but I didn’t.

I was in Las Vegas in May, walking around with some of my dearest blogger friends, when we were approached by two men. One guy went right up to a friend of mine; the other went to me. This man stopped me and said, “Can I ask you three questions and you answer honestly?”

“Does this one count?” I deadpanned. He paused. He didn’t get it. So he asked again, ”Can I ask you three questions and you answer honestly?” Keep reading »

The Best (Worst) Of The #MyGirlfriendNotAllowedTo Tweets

Ryan Lochte On Twitter
ryan lochte twitter
The Olympic swimmer says some weird stuff. Read More »

Twitter, man. The grammatically incorrect hashtag #MyGirlfriendNotAllowedTo is trending on the social media site right now, offering a cornucopia of shitty dudes saying shitty things about what their girlfriends are “not allowed to” do. The good news? Most of the #MyGirlfriendNotAllowedTo tweets don’t seem to be serious. The bad news? Some of them probably are. Click through to see what we’re talking about.

Keep reading »

6 Pieces Of Relationship Advice I Would Give You If We Were Friends

Advice Needed!
How do you make the transition from friends to more than friends? Read More »
Dating Don'ts: Bad Advice
The most unhelpful dating advice Ami ever received. Read More »
5 pieces of sex advice
Five simple pieces of sex advice from "Savage U." Read More »

Okay, so I would never claim to have it all figured out, but I can say that I’m pretty good at solving other people’s problems. That’s always the way, isn’t it? My friends come to me for love and support and advice, and I can usually give them a little nugget or two of truthy, kind, realness to help them determine what to do.

But because we’re not friends (YET!), you’re missing out on all my awesome advice. Which is why I’ve compiled a small listicle of things to remember, when it comes to relationships and dating. Please enjoy after the jump! And share your own wisdom bites in the comments. Keep reading »

The 8 Most Love-Addled Tweets Between Aaron Paul And Lauren Parsekian

Depending on your mood and romantic history, you’ll either find the love story of “Breaking Bad” actor Aaron Paul and his fiancee Lauren Parsekian to be hopelessly adorable or nauseatingly saccharine. During Paul’s Emmy acceptance speech Sunday night, he thanked his “beautiful, inspiring fiancée … Thank you so much for looking at me the way that you do, you truly saved me.” We love Aaron Paul, for obvious reasons, and  Parsekian, who is ridiculously gorgeous, seems pretty cool, too — she’s the cofounder of the Kind Campaign, which works with abused and bullied young girls. There’s, like, a lot of love between these two, and they’ve documented it in interviews, photos and endless Twitter posts about one another. We’ve captured the most, um, intense Twitter exchanges between these two lovebirds for your enjoyment. You tell us — is it too cute or too much?

"Breaking Bad"-icure
A meth-inspired manicure for "Breaking Bad" fans. Read More »
Breaking Bad Simpsons
If "Breaking Bad" and "The Simpsons" had a baby. Watch »
Celeb Love Stories
These are our favorite celebrity love stories of 2010. Read More »

Worst Boyfriend Ever Pretends To Die In Order To Show Girlfriend What Life Would Be Like Without Him

Be My BF: Farts
This guy used farts as a weapon. Read More »
Be My BF: Cat Singer
This guy sang "Kiss From A Rose" to his pet cat. Read More »
Be My BF: Pillow Fort
He prank called about Tim Tebow from his pillow fort. Read More »

Alexey Bykov wanted to prove to his girlfriend how important he was to her. How romantic, right? So he contracted a stuntman, makeup artist, screenwriter and director to stage a fake car crash just so his girlfriend could watch him die. Only, of course, Bykov, 30, from Onsk, Russia, wasn’t actually dead. He had staged the whole thing so that he could propose. Yes, this makes no sense.

“When I arrived there were mangled cars everywhere, ambulances, smoke, and carnage,” said Irina, clearly traumatized from the realization that she’s dating the most manipulative fucker ever. “Then when I saw Alexey covered in blood lying in the road a paramedic told me he was dead and I just broke down in tears.” Keep reading »

If Your Boyfriend Hasn’t Shipped Himself Through The Mail To You, It’s Like He Doesn’t Even Love You

Be My BF: Spreadsheet Guy
This guy made a spreadsheet of all his Match.com dates. Read More »
Be My BF: Felony Guy
10 felonies in 9 hours ... impressive. Read More »
Be My BF: Farts
This guy used farts as a weapon. Read More »

Chinese dude and definite Stevie Wonder fan Hu Seng wanted to show his girlfriend how much he loved her, so he mailed himself to her. The only problem? Hu Seng’s “package” got lost by the courier service he hired to deliver him, and he ended up spending way too long in his self-addressed cardboard box. When his girlfriend finally received the package, Hu Seng had passed out from lack of oxygen.

Seng spent three hours in the box. “I didn’t realize it would take so long,” he told the local news. “I tried to make a hole in the cardboard but it was too thick and I didn’t want to spoil the surprise by shouting.” Now that’s boyfriendly dedication.

This one time, my high school boyfriend showed up at my house and put himself in a large refrigerator box and “mailed himself” to my doorstep. It was cool, but he weird, and since I had already planned on spending the day shopping for gym clothes for P.E. class, I had no choice but to drag him along. Later, when we broke up, he wrote a fanzine about me that included my photo and address, and I occasionally got mail asking why I broke up with Todd. The ’90s were a weird time. [Daily Mail]

 

Be My Boyfriend: Guy Who Committed 10 Felonies In 9 Hours

Be My Boyfriend: Gumballs
He made the world's largest gumball out of Nicorette. Read More »
Be My Boyfriend: Jet Bike
This guys build a jet engine bike. Read More »
Be My Boyfriend: Pizza Guy
This guy ate 362 slices of pizza. We want to eat him. Read More »
Be My Boyfriend: Hair Guy
Evan is addicted to pulling hair out of shower drains. Read More »

Dear William Todd,

Color me impressed! There are career criminals that don’t accomplish in a lifetime what you did in nine hours: committing 10 felonies. Not only did you steal a taser, revolver and shotgun (and a T-shirt!) from Nashville bar The Slaughterhouse, but you then burned the business to the ground! And because you are a king among criminal men, you went on to commit many more crimes. There was the stop at a local bar where you held up four people at gunpoint, tasering one, and pistol-whipping another. And then, minutes later, you held up a taxi at gunpoint, driving the stolen car to a local Walmart where you purchased $199 in food. All that crime can make you hungry.

But your crime spree was only half over.

Keep reading »

5 Reasons Why Having A Plant Is Better Than Having A Boyfriend

I don’t have a dog … or a boyfriend. Once upon a time, I had both. This is not a country song by the way, I am going to take this in a different direction so stick with me. If I did have a dog, I might be writing about all the wonderful ways my imaginary dog, Sprinkles, enhances my life in the absence of a man. But Sprinkles is just a dog I met on the street while her real owner was walking her. And my landlord doesn’t allow pets in the building anyway. So that’s neither here nor there. For now, I’ll have to bestow all my loving praise upon my very cherished succulent, Curly (pictured left). A loyal plant can bring much joy to a single ladies’ life. Curly has been with me now for almost four years and I feel like we have a very solid relationship. After the jump, some reasons why having a plant is better than having a boyfriend. Keep reading »

Flowchart: Are You Dating A Cat?

Well are you? I am. His name is Colonel Mustard and he’s obese. Keep reading »

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