Crazy boob job stories are everywhere these days and we have one more to add. Yet another woman has gone too far in an effort to make her girls bigger. In 2008, California woman Yvonne Jean Pampellonne, 30, used someone else’s identity to get a $12,000 line of credit so she could get breast implants, liposuction and other procedures. On Monday, the so-called “Implant Bandit” was found guilty of second degree burglary, grand theft and identity theft, which landed her six months in jail. I’m going to go out on a limb and say that no matter how good she looks, it wasn’t worth it. [AP] Keep reading »
Not that you’d know if from the Heidi Montag Freakshow, but fewer Americans had plastic surgeries last year than four years before. According to the American Society for Aesthetic Plastic Surgery, operations dropped 19 percent from 2005 to 2009, from 2.1 million procedures to 1.9 million. Unfortunately, the ASAPS hypothesizes the recession is the reason why fewer Americans went under the knife — not because we collectively got a healthier body image. Even Dr. Elliot Jacobs, a Park Avenue plastic surgeon interviewed by the London Guardian newspaper, said (gleefully, we can assume), “As long as a woman or a man has a mirror available, there will be a continued interest in plastic surgery.” Depressing. [Guardian UK] Keep reading »
Hey, Brittany Daly of Steubenville, Ohio? You need to give Maria Alaimo of Staten Island — the woman whose plastic surgeon accidentally gave her four boobs — a call stat. Y’all need to start a club or something for victims of boob jobs gone wrong! On Friday, Daly filed a $300,000 malpractice lawsuit claiming Dr. Beverly Carl, of Bridgewater, PA, caused her “physical and emotional discomfort” when she gave her the wrong implants in a 2008 boob job. Keep reading »
As if ruptured implants and leaky silicone weren’t scary enough, a woman in Staten Island, New York, is suing the plastic surgeon of her 2003 boob job, claiming she was given four breasts, instead of two, in a botched breast implant procedure. According to a lawsuit filed on Tuesday, Maria Alaimo paid $7,000 cash for a pair of 36-C cups, but Dr. Keith Berman accidentally implanted a “double-bubble” of boobies. Alaimo is asking for $5 million to compensate for the pain she’s suffered from her freaky mammaries — which poor jurors at the Staten Island Supreme Court had to look at in pictures. (How about that for doing your civic duty!) According to the New York Daily News, post-op photos depict Alaimo’s quad-breasts as “flattened on the bottom with severe swells the size of a softball on top. (Imagine what this would look like on Pamela Anderson, left, thanks to the magic of Photoshop.)
Yuck. All the more reason to keep our jiggly bits natural, right, ladies? [New York Daily News] Keep reading »
Vanity is something that plagues women—all of us have fallen prey to the aesthetic monster at some point. When I first saw pop tart Heidi Montag unveil her shiny new body and face after getting 10 cosmetic procedures in one day, I thought, “WTF? She didn’t need any work done—she was 23 and beautiful.” But then again, someone probably would have said the same thing about me.
I’ll admit it—I recently had one-tenth of Heidi’s plastic surgery. Strike that—I prefer to call it “non-plastic surgery.” As a 26-year-old single black female, I had finally gotten fed up with my top parts, which had started to resemble two droopy, sad party balloons. I wish I could say I had the pleasure of once having amazing boobs, but, annoyingly, they have always been more National Geographic-style. And so, I volunteered to be the guinea pig for a brand-new non-invasive breast lift. Keep reading »
“No, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with getting breast implants as a Christian. I think it’s a personal decision. I don’t see anywhere in the Bible where it says you shouldn’t get breast implants.
—De-throned beauty queen Carrie Prejean may also be surprised that the Bible doesn’t say anything about airplanes, the polio vaccine, pasteurized milk, or electricity, either. [Christianity Today] Keep reading »
Another week, another Carrie Prejean eyeroll-worthy drama. The latest dirt? Our beloved ex-Miss California still owes $5,200 for a boob job paid for by pageant organizer K2 Productions, according to a lawsuit filed yesterday. K2 said it foot the bill for plastic surgery at Prejean’s behest, so she could “be more competitive” in the 2009 Miss USA pageant, and she hasn’t honored a verbal agreement to pay them back. (Verbal agreement? Get it in writing, people!) Keep reading »
Plastic surgeons have reached a truly DIY medical breakthrough in Britain: cutting fat from a woman’s thighs and tummy and pasting it on her titties. Ladies who allow surgeons to play Mrs. Potato Head with their breasts can potentially shoot up three cup sizes. The “two-in-one op,” as it’s being called, will be widely available in Britain next year for around $13,000 and is currently being tested in the U.S.
It’s true that these so-called “natural breast enlargements” don’t involve the dodgy silicone used in most boob jobs, which has been known to harden over time and feel fake. But it’s still plastic surgery, which isn’t “natural” at all! Besides, how much would it suck if the layers of fat that the doctor redistributed from your thighs turned out to be the dreaded cellulite and it made your tits all wrinkly and pucker-y? Is that really worth a C-cup, ladies? [Times Of London] Keep reading »