Oh, no she di’-n’t! After being crowned Miss Gay Brazil 2009, Ava Simões got her wig snatched clean off her head by a fellow PO’d contestant! And her tiara, too! Talk about a sore drag queen loser. If that had happened to me, I know I would’ve cut a fellow contestant. You do not grab my wig and run. Or, you know, I would have at least beat her with my stiletto. Dios mio! Drama ensues. [BuzzFeed]

Another day, another beauty pageant sex scandal. And no, this post amazingly has nothing to do with Carrie Prejean, who evidently has eight sex tapes, or Kari Ann Peniche, of Eric Dane/Rebecca Gayheart fame. (Is it just a coincidence that they have the same name spelled differently?) This time around it’s Anya Ayoung-Chee, Miss Trinidad/Tobago 2008, who’s been caught on camera in four separate clips. Two of the vids show her getting down and dirty with her boyfriend, Wyatt Gallery. A third and fourth clip show her in a threesome with an unidentified woman. At first, people thought the third was Hiroko Mima, Miss Japan 2008, but Gallery spoke up to say that wasn’t her. The video was shot back in 2007—a big year for beauty queen sex tapes, evidently—and supposedly was swiped from Gallery’s computer when he brought it in to be repaired. “I feel horrible and embarrassed for Anya, her family and myself,” he’s said. When will the tiara set learn not to record their hanky-panky? [NY Daily News]

The coffee table book High Glitz would seriously freak out anyone who sat down on my couch. The collection of images shows beauty queen toddlers posing for the child pageant sub-genre called Glitz. These tots get glamour makeup, front teeth veneers, and couture costumes before being photographed. It speaks from an era I hoped didn’t really exist. So, are these beautiful images or child abuse? You’ll have to be the judge. I say somebody needs to take these kids outside to make mud pies. [Lil Sugar]

Miss America loves inviting random people to judge over their annual grossfest pageant. But the judging panel for the 2010 pageant will include perhaps the most random person ever—Rush Limbaugh. Yes, the king of conservative talk radio. Because it won’t be creepy at all to have a 58-year-old dude gawking at and then giving scores to early twenty-somethings in bathing suits? The Miss America Organization is excited to have Rush as a judge. “We know that the 2010 Miss America Pageant will be filled with new twists and exciting opportunities with him as one of our national judges,” says the organization’s president. Perhaps they’re trying to make up for the snafu that occurred when ultra-liberal (and also kind of repulsive) Perez Hilton asked Carrie Prejean a question about gay marriage? Will Rush be fielding questions about prescription pill abuse? Guess we’ll have to tune in to TLC on Jan. 30 to find out. [AOL]

And we thought Heidi Montag’s performance and all the plastic surgery at the Miss Universe pageant was scandalous? Check out this video of Miss Australia blowing up a condom to the point where it burst. The backstory: a few days before the pageant, the Miss Universe Organization held a “Condom Olympics” in conjunction with Population Services International (PSI), a global health organization which sponsors the YouthAIDS program. At said Olympics, the Miss Universe contestants participated in a slew of condom-use and HIV-awareness games, including one where condoms filled with water were used as shot-put balls. The winner of the contest received a spot as a YouthAIDs ambassador. Of course, not everyone was so excited about this event and many religious groups are up in arms about it. What do you think—good way for the Miss Universe contestants to use their fame in their respective countries, or completely out of line? [CNS News]

When Miss Venezuela Stefania Fernandez, 18, was crowned Miss Universe, she got so excited she could barely keep the crown on her head. It’s the second year in a row that a Venezuelan has won the tiara, and the sixth win since the pageant began. So why all the wins? Because in Venezuela, beauty pageants are kind of like a national sport. After the jump, the insane details of this pageant-obsessed culture.

How narrow-minded of Jezebel to question why a black pageant contestant would need a spray tan! Sure, Victoria’s mother on “Toddlers & Tiaras” is feeding into the overly-primped beauty ideal that is plaguing child beauty pageants, but to assume that she was overdoing the pageant preparation because she was tanning her already brown child is plain wrong. News flash: some black folks do enjoy tanning. It’s one of my most relaxing summer pastimes, which I learned from my mother who is about Victoria’s complexion. And yes, there are varying degrees of darkness, but what I like is the golden undertone that safe(r) tanning gives me. Maybe next time Jezebel will be more open-minded when it comes to child beauty pageants and just hate on them like every other rational-thinking person.

Former beauty pageant star Brooke Breedwell (um, yes, that’s her real name) has spoken out about her pageant past. You may recognize her from this disturbing documentary, “Painted Babies.” Today, she doesn’t look back on her participation fondly. Now a sophomore in college, Breedwell claims that her mother not only pushed her too hard, the experience scarred her for life. “Pageants have put a lot of stress and anxiety on my life,” she told “Good Morning America.” “I feel the need to be perfect at everything, and I know that’s not realistic. You can’t be perfect at everything.” Is it time we start regulating baby beauty pageants?

Not only are we wondering whether boys should compete in beauty pageants, we’re questioning whether prisoners strutting their stuff for the judges is the best way to “rehabilitate” those behind bars. Whatever your take on it, jail-bird beauty queens aren’t a new entry into the world of bizarro pageants—but one Russian women’s prison “biker chic” contest goes above and beyond! Check out the crowned winner (above) as well as all the dramatic behind-the-scenes shots after the jump.

Are boys becoming girls? They’re already getting mani/pedis and are competing in glitzy beauty pageants. It seems a new generation of boys is being raised to obsess about their looks like their female counterparts. This video, from season one of TLC’s “Toddlers & Tiaras,” features Heather Hughes, mom of Hayden and Maverick. In the clip Heather expresses a desire to turn her sons into little girls. “These are my girls that I never had, so I’ll just turn them into girls,” she said when asked why she started entering them in pageants.

“Ever had plastic surgery to become beautiful? Are you proud of your body? Would you like to put yourself to the test?” These are all questions most beauty queens would be too embarrassed to answer, but one Hungarian company isn’t afraid to ask. The website MissPlasticHungary.hu is seeking contestants for what it says is the first ever beauty pageant for women who have had cosmetic surgery. Pageant organizers are trying to fight the stigma associated with beauty operations in Hungary. The contest is open to women between the ages of 18 and 30 and to women older than 30 in the “dame” category, all of whom must have had a surgical procedure performed under local or general anesthesia; a simple Botox injection won’t suffice, and neither will extremely large breasts (remember they’re trying to fight the stigma?). So far, 100 entrants have already signed up for the pageant that is supposed to occur on October 9. Maybe Carrie Prejean has a pageant comeback in her future? [Reuters]

American beauty pageants are all about the long legs, shiny teeth and not saying anything too dense when asked, “How would you make the world a better place?” But at the Miss Beautiful Morals pageant in Saudi Arabia, there’s no swimsuit competition.

Instead, in that deeply Islamic country where women are covered from head to toe in long robes called abayas, contestants vie to see who is most obedient of her parents. A hundred girls ranging in age from 15 to 25 will compete for the Miss Beautiful Morals crown. The queen wins $2,600, and each runner up wins $1,300. The real prize, those involved in the pageant say, is strengthening their devotion to their families.

Barbie just can’t seem to get a break, despite celebrating her 50th birthday this month. A West Virginia lawmaker, Democrat Jeff Eldridge, has proposed the Ban Barbie Bill because he believes dolls like this place too much importance on physical beauty, and not enough on intellectual and emotional development. “I just hate the image that we give to our kids that if you’re beautiful, you’re beautiful and you don’t have to be smart,” said Eldridge. Other dolls that are believed to send this message will also be banned if the bill is passed. Eldridge admits some Barbie dolls, like Doctor Barbie and Veterinary Barbie, are better, but would nevertheless be outlawed in West Virginia also. Forget the fact that Eldridge is perpetuating a sexist double standard—action figures teach little boys that aggression, physical prowess, and weapons trump intellect. If he’s looking to place blame for kids thinking beauty is the be all and end all, maybe he should look at the parents in his own state, where mothers enter their daughters in pageants like the “Toddlers & Tiaras”-featured Southern Celebrity Beauty Pageant in Charleston, West Virginia. These mothers primp, bleach, and tan their daughters, as young as six months, into sashaying and dancing living dolls. That’s got to be more damaging than child play. [MSNBC.com]

Thanks to our girls at Lemondrop for calling our attention to this awesomely hysterical video montage of pageant mothers made by Rich at FourFour. If you only have a few seconds, skip ahead to 2:28. If you have hours to screw around, head on over to YouTube and watch the entirety of the amazing “Living Dolls” documentary, featuring the unforgettable Swan Brooner. It’s frightening in a good way—you won’t regret it.

Next month, the first beauty pageant for nuns will debut. Anointing a Miss Sister Italy “will be a way to show there isn’t just the beauty we see on television but also a more discrete charm,” said priest Antonio Rungi. “Nuns are a bit excluded, they are a bit marginalized in ecclesiastical life.” But don’t expect nuns to strip off their habits and compete in swimsuit or evening gown competitions. While Antonio thinks that external beauty is a gift from God not to be hidden, the contest will take place online, with people voting for the nun “they consider a model,” he said. [Sydney Morning Herald, AP]