Tag Archives: be my boyfriend

Be My Boyfriend: Man Who Drunkenly Rode Horse Through Colorado With His Pet Pug

Be My BF: Drunk Horse
be my boyfriend lasso guy
A guy walks into a bar. With a horse. And a lasso. Read More »
Be My BF: Lobster Thief
He stole lobsters to buy drugs. Read More »
Be My Boyfriend: Batman Goatee
This guy wears the bat signal on his face! Read More »

Dear Patrick Neal Schumacher,

I get it: You were caught between a rock and a horse ride, as it were. You needed to get to your brother’s wedding some 600 miles away, but because your driver’s license had been suspended, you needed to find an alternate means of travel. Planes, trains and other automobiles were apparently out of the question, so you did what any enterprising, horse-owning person might: You decided to traverse the distance to Bryce, Utah, on horseback. Keep reading »

Be My Boyfriend: Man Who Rode Into A Bar & Lassoed A Customer

Be My BF: Monkey Man
This dude moves like a monkey, Watch »
Be my bf: deer head
He's been wearing this deer head for FOUR YEARS. Read More »
Be My BF: Turtleman
Why Julie loves the "Call of the Wildman" star. Read More »

The heart wants what it wants. And in the case of James Rene Mouton of Scott, Louisiana, the heart wanted to ride a horse into a bar and lasso a guy.

The 26-year-old had stopped into the Cowboys nightclub and kept his horse trailer parked in the bar’s parking lot. Which was convenient, because at some point during the night, he decided that he needed to go riding. In the bar. He was escorted out of the establishment on his steed by a 47-year-old man, who was then lassoed and dragged through the parking lot by Mouton.

Oh, but that’s not all.

A drunk Mouton dropped the horse off at his parent’s house and then returned to the bar on foot. The police were called, and Mouton tried to hide, but was eventually found and charged with disturbing the peace, remaining after being forbidden, second degree battery, public intimidation and retaliation.

Well, it is called Cowboys Nightclub. [KTSM]

Be My Soulmate: Man Who Was Diagnosed With “Chronic, Incurable Lateness”

Be My Bf: Air Guitar
Eric Mean Melin Air Guitar Champion
He's the 2013 Air Guitar Champion! Read More »
Be my BF: Deer Head
He's been wearing a deer head for four years. Read More »
How to spot your soulmate
Soulmates are hard to miss. But here are some tips, just in case! Read More »

Dear Jim Dunbar,

For your entire life, you’ve never been able to make it to anything on time. Your lack of punctuality has caused you to miss appointments and flights and lose jobs and girlfriends. Your lateness is such a problem that when you recently wanted to see a movie, you gave yourself an 11-hour head start — and still showed up to the theater 20 minutes late. You’ve always thought your lateness was beyond your control, and while that may sound ridiculous to most people, I know exactly how you feel! I’m always late too. Always. No matter how much extra time I give myself or how much I prepare, I inevitably find myself sneaking into every event and engagement 5-20 minutes late. I’ve dealt with my tardiness issues by getting more organized and also getting really, really good at saying, “Sorry I’m late!” You, however, had a different strategy. You went to the doctor. Keep reading »

Be My Boyfriend: Steak Thief Who Dressed In A Cow Onesie

Be My Bf: Air Guitar
Eric Mean Melin Air Guitar Champion
He's the 2013 Air Guitar Champion! Read More »
Be My BF: Engineering Student
Be My Boyfriend: Engineering Student Nick Selby Crushes Georgia Tech Convocation -- And Our Hearts
Nick Selby crushed Georgia Teach convocation. Read More »
Be MY BF: Weed and Koolaid
This man dialed 911 looking for weed. Of course. Read More »

Dear Steak Thief,

I don’t condone stealing, really I don’t. But the fact that you dressed up in a cow-printed onesie while stealing porterhouse from the meat aisle demands my admiration. The police seemed to have overlooked your intentional irony. A spokeswoman for the police department released a statement saying that because onesies are a common clothing item, you were “probably not intending to look like the beef [you] were stealing”. Wait, what?  It’s common for men to wear onesies in New Zealand? Maybe I should move there. Keep reading »

Be My Boyfriend: Eric “Mean Melin” Melin, 2013 Air Guitar World Champion

Be My BF: Heavy Metal
He gets disability for his heavy metal addiction. Read More »
Be MY Bf: Mom Complaint
Man calls 911 to complain about his mama. Read More »
Be My BF: Klingon Sword
Johnnie Blade wielded a Klingon sword. Read More »
Eric Mean Melin Air Guitar Champion
This guy can thrash some air!

Dear Eric (or do you prefer to be called “Mean Melin”?),

I just watched your performance at the 2013 Air Guitar World Championships in Finland, and all I can say is: wow. You’ve got some serious moves, dude. Everyone knows that dating a musician is the worst, but since your instrument is imaginary, I think you might be an exception to the rule. I play a pretty fierce air saxophone, if I do say so myself. Maybe we can jam sometime and see where this goes?

Xoxo,
Winona

[YouTube via Laughing Squid]

Be My Boyfriend: Engineering Student Nick Selby Crushes Georgia Tech Convocation — And Our Hearts

Be My Boyfriend: Batman Goatee
This guy wears the bat signal on his face! Read More »
Be My Boyfriend: Turtleman
Why Julie loves the "Call of the Wildman" star. Read More »
Be My Boyfriend: Jet Bike
This guy built a jet engine bike. Read More »
Be My Boyfriend: Engineering Student Nick Selby Crushes Georgia Tech Convocation -- And Our Hearts
"I am doing thatttttt!"

Dear Nick,

I watched the inspirational and well-soundtracked speech you gave to the incoming class of engineering students at Georgia Tech, and I was inspired! No, I’ll never build an “Iron Man” suit, and I’ll likely never attend the Georgia Tech engineering program, because, well, math. But your speech was so powerful — especially the part where you said “If you wanna play theme music during your convocation speech like a badass, you can do that! I … am … doing … that!” – that I now feel prepared to take on a new challenge: making you my boyfriend so hard. Keep reading »

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