Spring Cleaning Week at The Frisky has made it seem like we’re all a couple of Martha Stewarts hoovering Adderall. Lies! While we’re not gross-gross, I do feel it is my duty as a Frisky staffer to present an honest portrait of us: we’re a little gross. Julie’s desk is a wasteland of half-eaten snacks, Ami’s is covered in papers, mine has bagel crumbs stuck to coffee stains, and Amelia’s got a half-drunk plastic cup of red wine on hers that’s been sitting there for days. (Not even sure what that’s about — possibly this?) In conclusion, we probably shouldn’t be lecturing ANYBODY about cleanliness.
So, in the interest of full disclosure, we’re going to — anonymously! — share some gross things we do in the bathroom which we would never admit to doing.
Please don’t tell our mothers. Keep reading »
Today is a sad day. The Whole Foods at Union Square in Manhattan finally figured out my trick — I’ve been using their bathrooms as a public restroom without ever buying anything for years. As of today, there are now complicated locks on the door, requiring a Whole Foods-mandated door code, which you can only get on your Whole Foods receipt. My jig is up.
As someone with a very, uh, healthy digestive tract, I frequently find myself in need of a bathroom when I’m out and about. I’ve scoped out all the typical options, and have come up with a list of preferred pee spots when you’re in a bind. Some general rules: It may behoove you to carry a packet of tissues in your bag, just in case you find a terlet but no TP. And! Remember that just because a place serves food, doesn’t mean that they’ll have a restroom. Many places that have only one or two tables qualify as “take away” establishments and aren’t legally required to have public restrooms. Also, a little hand sanitizer couldn’t hurt either. Below, I’ve cataloged my list of preferred emergency pee spots, from most desired to least. Please add your emergency pee solutions in the comments! Keep reading »
The blogger behind the parenting site Ben and Birdy recently had a run-in with a man who mistook her son for a girl. The incident happened in a public restroom, and the man vocally made a scene, questioning the boy’s gender and his right to be in a male public restroom. Appalled by the rude and ignorant behavior of the stranger — the guy apparently asked her, “Are you its mom?” — the unnamed blog mom took to the interwebs, and penned a hilarious and on-point response:
I just want to start by applauding your decision to shout at us right off the bat. “She was in the men’s room! Your daughter was in the men’s room! A girl in the men’s room!” For one thing, how else will we learn? For another, how else will we be covered in spittle? Plus, I think it’s good, if you see something unexpected, to proceed with violent certainty rather than with, say, wonder or even doubt. Like the time I found that slightly darker O in my bowl of Cheerios and freaked out because I knew for sure that it was a wheel from the landing gear of a miniature UFO that was going to abduct me and probe my anus; if it were cereal, it would look like the rest of the cereal. Likewise, if you see a doll with short hair, even if it’s lying next to a pair of scissors, you should think, “Ew. When did Ken’s boobs get so big?”
It’s a soapdish! It’s a tub stopper! It’s … both! How cute is this rowboat-shaped soapdish, which is attached to a tub stopper on a chain? You’ll always have your soap nearby when you’re reading in the bath and look hella cute doing it, too. Now, if this darling little boat floats on top of the bath, too, that would just be the bees knees. Someone buy one and report back, please? [$15.99, ModCloth]
Greetings, friends. We’re going to try and introduce a new feature around here: “The Most Insane Moment On This Morning’s ‘Today Show.’” The Frisky office always watches the fourth hour of “The Today Show” — that is, when Amelia’s not hanging out with Hoda and Kathie Lee herself! — and we’re going to share their most wacky, insane, red wine-iest moments with you as often as we can. Because we just love you so much. Today, Kathie Lee and Hoda discuss a Swedish lawmaker (a man!) who thinks men should be forced to urinate sitting down to decrease the likelihood of sprays and puddles.
Puddles? And I thought our bathroom at work was bad.
I want to talk about a very important subject–one near and dear to all of our colons and butts. Pooping. And specifically, pooping at work. There are some of us who feel unable to poop at work. And then there are those of us (RAISES HAND) who do not understand how some people have the mental and physical wherewithal to NOT poop at work. As a workplace pooper, I think it remarkable that some of my colleagues and friends have the willpower and physical control to save the pooping until they get home. Keep reading »
A Washington, DC woman got caught with her pants down when the toilet she was using exploded suddenly. Apparently, a mechanical failure of epic proportions was triggered by her flush. She was rushed to the hospital with serious, not non-life threatening injuries. Well, this doesn’t give me any sort of anxiety about flushing. At. All. Let this story be a lesson to us all: flush with caution. Scary stuff can happen anywhere, even on the crapper. Click through to see some of the craziest toilet tales of all time. [Newslite]