Tag Archives: barbie

Sweet Talkin’ Ken Is Barbie’s Bitch

At last, a man who says everything you want him to say! Meet Mattel’s Sweet Talkin’ Ken doll ($31), who records five seconds of your voice and plays it back in a deep baritone. Barbie and her boy toy split ages ago, but I’m sure they’ll get back together as soon as Barbie realizes she can totally make Sweet Talkin’ Ken her bitch. Repeat after me, Sweet Talkin’ Ken: “You look like you need a foot massage!”; “Don’t worry, I’ll take the garbage out”; “Sure, I’ll go down on you while you watch ‘Real Housewives!” Sigh. If only we could program men in real life this way. [Mattel via Outblush] Keep reading »

Janet Jackson Is A Barbie Doll

Mattel has captured Janet Jackson’s fabulousness with the “Divinely Janet” Barbie doll, a doll that wears the glamorous gown and catsuit the real Janet wore on “American Idol.” The Barbie even has Janet’s new cropped hairstyle! Sadly, though, the doll is one-of-a-kind and has been put up for auction to raise funds for Project Angel Food, a charity that benefits people living with HIV/AIDS, cancer, and other life-threatening illnesses. At least a doll that deserves to be in my Barbie collection will benefit a good cause. [Clutch] Keep reading »

Nicki Minaj Is Armless Barbie For “Pink Friday”

This is the cover art for Nicki Minaj‘s debut album, Pink Friday, which drops this week. It’s very pink. Nicki appears to have lost both her arms, like the Venus de Milo. Her legs have been Photoshop-stretched like Gumby. What does it all mean? It’s a little Lady Gaga, a little Paris Hilton, or maybe that’s just how Nicki likes it. [Amazon] Keep reading »

Barbie Gets Angel-fied

Farrah Fawcett gets a posthumous Barbie makeover. In February, you can own the Farrah Barbie for a mere $1,500. Striped blanket included. All proceeds will go to the Farrah Fawcett Foundation, which funds cancer prevention and awareness. [The Hairpin] Keep reading »

Lady Gaga: The Barbie Slayer

At a show in Ireland over the weekend, Lady Gaga killed a Barbie. She did it Ozzy Osbourne-style, by sticking it in her mouth and beheading it … and then rubbing it on her leather, studded crotch. Man, we wish we were there to see the execution ourselves! When my Barbies got destroyed as a kid, it was usually through some brother-related microwave hijinx. But Gaga always takes things to the next level!
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Ken Gets A Reality Show. Whitney Port Hosts?

“The City” is dunzo, but Whitney Port is moving onto bigger and better things. You know, like hosting an online reality series about … wait for it … Barbie‘s hunkahunka burnin’ love, Ken. The eight-episode series on Hulu.com will be called “Genuine Ken: The Search for the Great American Boyfriend” and features eight guys competing in challenges to see who’s the best “boyfriend for every occasion.” They must show off their Ken-like qualities by dazzling us with their fashion sense, romancing a lady, and—because this is Ken we are talking about—surfing. Yes, surfing. Presumably, Whitney is the lucky lady who gets to judge each of these Romeos on their boyfriend skillz; never mind that the real Ken broke up with Barbie around Valentine’s Day 2004. Minor detail, right? In my opinion, Heidi Montag would have been a much better human Barbie doll to find the perfect Ken. [Variety] Keep reading »

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