When my grandma called me a few weeks ago to make me promise I’d go out with her friend’s grandson if he called me, I stupidly agreed. You see, my thinking was, What guy is really going to call some girl he doesn’t know because her grandma says she’s a catch? And even if he did defy my cynical expectations and call me, good old grandma told me a solid five times that he is just “so handsome, Lily, you have no idea. And witty, too!”
So when mystery man did, in fact, call a week later, I paused briefly before agreeing to lunch. I mean, if worse came to worst, at least I’d have something pretty to look at while contemplating ripping my arm off just for the excitement.
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No need to annoy all your girlfriends with that story of what happened between you and that hipster DJ, Sorry-Mom.com is a website that let’s any woman spill her tale of woe and whoa. Page after page, women pour over their crappy sexual encounters. Each story comes complete with the dude’s picture (Bonus! Though his eyes are always blacked out, to “protect” privacy) and a blurb. It’s the kind of dirt that’ll make a girl smirk with empathy! With a vicious bent like trash talking a guy’s Johnson, I expect the site to be run by a spurned divorcee ala Tricia “Crazy Eyes” Walsh-Smith of Park Avenue. Bitching about boys and literally hitting them below the belt seems like such a mean girl thing to do. And it begs the question, why isn’t there a version of this site so guys can rant? I’ve heard some things about ladies that made my jaw drop. But, would a man ever care enough to write a paragraph that admits to their broken heart, then diss the chick, add a pic and email it in, just for the satisfaction of ranting? Do guys seek emotional revenge….and at the grandiose level of the internet? May be we should all be grateful that so far, the answer is no.
Well if you feel like laughing like you just don’t care, here are our favorite tales from “I Bang The Worst Dudes” after the jump… Keep reading »