As wise poet and personal role model LuAnn deLesseps once crowed — actually she autotuned it — “money can’t buy you class.” Money also can’t buy you style, as evidenced by the wide array of horribly ugly pants on offer by high end designers these days. Do you have $600 and no abiding sense of taste and the desire to look like a meth-addict out for her first post-prison cig break? We’ve got some really wowzer designer trousers just for you. Check them out in our gallery of wildly overpriced ugly pants.
Happy Friday! It’s time for Don’t Show-cha Your Chocha! Click through to see the super short hemlines and questionable definitions of the word “dress” that caught our eye recently–we’ve got some doozies for you this week. And remember, if you spot a Don’t Show-cha Your Chocha moment, send it to me at firstname.lastname@example.org!
These footwear atrocities are actually labeled “Boots” on the Yoox website, which doesn’t make much sense, but when I try to think of a more appropriate moniker for them, I understand the dilemma. I guess you could call them “Stirrup Legging Sandals,” or maybe “Prosthetic Leg Covers,” but in the end, I think “Really, Really Ugly” is probably the best descriptor. [$108, Yoox]
Happy Friday! It’s time for Don’t Show-cha Your Chocha, in which we round up photos of super short dresses, questionable hem lines, and other indicators of the inevitable extinction of pants. Here are the top five DSYC moments that caught our eye this week…
When “Clueless” heroine Cher Horowitz declared, “You try driving in platforms,” we’re guessing she may have been wearing these Jeffrey Campbell platform sneakers, which, we presume, Campbell designed by putting a pair of Adidas on steroids. In fact, we can think of a whole number of activities these 4.5-inch shoes would limit you from doing including climbing up stairs, square dancing, standing, and, um, walking. Although, one intrepid shopper does comment on Urban’s site, “OMG. So I bought this pair of shoes to go to the gym because I wanted to look stylish. You would not believe the attention I received because of this pair of ah-mazing shoes. Yowza. My friends are super mega jealous and like they totally want to buy them. Coolness. Super comfy and tres chic!” [Urban Outfitters]
I’m going to Mexico at the beginning of May, so I’m starting to keep my eye peeled for a new swimsuit for my trip. I have yet to find a bikini that I really want, but I have come across a whole mess of swimsuits that would get me more than a few looks on the beach. It seems that some swimwear designers these days aren’t creatively inspired by simple batik prints or bright colors — no, they’re into the Animal Kingdom (and I don’t mean classic cheetah prints), bones, and body parts, amongst other non-traditional influences. You know … so edgy! Click on to see 17 swimsuits I simply do not have the balls to wear.
You’re wearing a “Nice Girls Don’t Pepper Spray” shirt? No. Just NO. [Sears.com]
Sure, you could spend $990 on this T-shirt by Thakoon, BUT YOU’D BE AN IDIOT! Sorry, I don’t mean to yell, but this T-shirt isn’t pooping diamonds, so I can’t understand why it costs so much. Do you? [$990, Shopbop]
Adrienne Bailon was a member of the Cheetah Girls. She also dated Rob Kardashian. Now she fancies herself a fashion designer, as this strange frock is something she made herself. From curtains and a sheer bodystocking? It’s unclear, but the jacket is a nice touch. [via Dlisted]
Happy Friday! It’s time for this week’s edition of Don’t Show-cha Your Chocha, starring a nearly naked Lady Gaga (before she was Gaga), an epic pelvic thrust from Taylor Swift, and a few unlucky models trying desperately not to flash the cameras. Click through to check it out, and remember — if you spot a Don’t Show-cha Your Chocha moment, send it to email@example.com.