Dear Demi and Ashton,
Congratulations on your fifth wedding anniversary, which you celebrated in bed on Friday. I know you celebrated your anniversary in bed on Friday because you tweeted a picture of the two of you cuddling between the sheets with the message “Thank you for all the anniversary wishes!! Enjoying a day lounging around watching “Breaking Bad” Great show!” So now I guess I also know you enjoy “Breaking Bad,” which is, you know, great. I’m happy for you. Congratulations! Congratulations on having a show you love to watch, and for being married five years, and for having gorgeous bodies. Demi, those recent pictures your tweeted of you in a tiny white bikini were very impressive, they were. You should be proud. And, yes, you look so young and hip in those chunky black glasses you’ve been sporting. But, now, please, won’t you STFU? Keep reading »