How was your weekend? Mine was pretty great, except for the random moments when I would remember that rosebudding exists and I would start audibly gagging like a cat coughing up a furball. Which is awkward when you’re in public and the last thing you want to do is explain why you’re gagging.
Anyway, I have good news and bad news! The bad news is that I am writing about rosebudding again. The good news is that, according to The Daily Dot, this “trend” is so rare that it’s pretty much ridiculous to even call it a trend. For starters, a gastroenterologist told The Daily Dot that a prolapsed anus is not something a usually healthy person has and is most commonly seen in the elderly — therefore the chances that ladies with pink socks are running rampant in the pornosphere is pretttttty unlikely. Male porn star Christian XXX confirmed as much, telling the Dot, “No one can do it. You have to get buttfucked like 10,000 times repeatedly just to maybe prolapse. I can’t think of five girls [in the industry who can prolapse].” And what talented ladies they are. Keep reading »
This week, Alabama shook off a long overdue, ridiculous law criminalizing oral and anal sex between unmarried partners. The anti-sodomy law was mostly used to criminalize homosexual behavior, even between consenting unmarried partners (I probably don’t need to tell you gay marriage is not legal in AL). An appeals court overturned the law, citing the Supreme Court’s 2003 Lawrence vs. Texas decision that found criminalizing same-sex behavior was unconstitutional.
Now Alabama’s Attorney General (and owner of a perfect movie villain name) Luther Strange wants the appeals court to reconsider — and he may kinda, sorta have a point. Bear with me … Keep reading »
Yesterday, like a child who touches a stove even after mom says it’s hot, I read an article about a new “trend” in extreme anal porn called “rosebudding” despite being warned in the first paragraph that to proceed was unwise for those with weak stomachs. I almost vomited. Then, like a particularly stupid child who needs to learn a lesson the hard way more than once, I read a second article about rosebudding. And then, as Jessica stood by and watched on IM, I did some researching and happened upon a GIF of rosebudding in action and I will never ever ever ever ever ever be the same again. Take it from me, the IM conversation after the jump contains all you need to know about rosebudding — unless, of course, you could never resist touching the stove, in which case, get Googling fellow idiotic weirdos. [Vice via Jezebel] Keep reading »
Hi there, American Apparel. I was prepared to defend your bush mannequin and I was responding really positively, as Tim Gunn would say, to your 62-year-old lingerie model. But then you went and posted a thong ad on your Tumblr featuring a peek-a-boo of a perfectly waxed asshole riding a bicycle, or as a commenter called it, “sidehole.” While the model’s butthole looks quite pristine (see the NSFW version after the jump), it’s just too much. I cannot. Thoughts? [American Apparel via Inagist] Keep reading »
There’s a stigma around virginity, so gay college student Clayton Pettet, 19, is doing his part by having anal sex inside an art gallery in front of a live audience on January 25th. Pettet’s performance art will be called “Art School Stole My Virginity” and will include first-time butt sex with a friend and then a chat with the gallery patrons about what they thought of the performance. All this will then be graded, presumably, for London’s Central Saint Martin’s art school. Methinks he is totally overestimating his ability to have anal sex to completion on the first try; his “once-in-a-lifetime performance” might need a couple tries.
Well, at least they are having safe sex. Carry on. [Queerty] [Image of monkeys via Shutterstock]
“The Loophole” is another brilliant piece of musical comedy from Garfunkel & Oates, the duo that brought you “29/31.” This time, they’ve moved on from single bitterness to Christian girls who stay “virgins” until they’re married but have anal sex instead. Otherwise known as “going to fifth base” or having “the sex that God can’t see.” They also refer to touching the clitoris as “ringing Satan’s doorbell,” which just killed me. [Jezebel]
That “private” Farrah Abraham and James Deen sex tape is here to ruin lunch for us all! From a blowjob, to P-in-V sex, to the “back door” anal sex as promised, we see James and Farrah in all kinds of clearly-planned-in-advance-for-Vivid fun. Farrah’s her usual nasally, kinda ditzy self but you’ll never look at “Teen Mom” the same way again. For some reason, this sex tape is especially uncomfortable. (Though I beg to disagree with her allegation that Deen is rocking a small penis. There’s a reason this guy is a professional porn star.) You can watch an edited clip above and the full 5-minute clip here. It’s very NSFW. Like, don’t get it twisted, it is straight up hardcore pornography.
Now excuse me while I go try and burn the image of Farrah Abraham’s anus from my mind. I need to “Enternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind” that shit.
Here’s a shocking surprise: The Frisky staff are a bunch of total pervs. And even though I don’t write a ton about sex, I basically have the mentality of a 12-year-old boy, where I think butts, boobs and penises are super funny all the time. This morning, in a haze of cold medicine, I started thinking about my long-held theory that tons of supposedly clean pop songs are actually just thinly veiled missives on boning. Like come on, just what are Hall & Oates referring to when they sing “I can’t go for that, no no, no can do”? It’s definitely about anal.
After the jump, we ruin some of your favorite songs.
Keep reading »