Today in Things That Aren’t Cute: these uniforms Ralph Lauren designed for the U.S. Olympic Team. Blazers, berets, knee-length skirts — the company’s statement says the outfits aim to “embody the spirit of American athleticism and sportsmanship,” but I think they’re more “Phillips Exeter Academy, sailing, affected accents from a place that doesn’t exist, that kid you know named John Charles Johnson III, your mom’s Valium in the mirrored bathroom cabinet, and things that do not and will never genuinely define America as a whole unless, of course, you happen to be asking Ralph Lauren.” I grew up in Connecticut. I know this shit.
Today is Flag Day, so we thought we’d celebrate in a way only The Frisky can: by bringing you some hot guys wrapped in flags. Enjoy!
Have you eaten lunch yet? You might be about to lose it. Traditional American dishes are getting grosser and grosser. These stately favorites are packing cholesterol, saturated fats, and obscene portion sizes. It’s no surprise that the United States has obesity problems: Americans are quick to chow down on fast food, greasy snacks, and fried, sugary desserts. We just about tossed our cookies when we saw South Carolina’s turducken (left) and New York’s garbage plate (right). Check out the 50 fattiest foods in the United States, but not if you’re looking for anything remotely edible. Heart attack with a side of cellulite, anyone? [Health.com] Keep reading »
Penises have caused many people to do many things. In the case of construction, builders keep on raising the bar, inch by inch! While most people look up at these buildings in awe, we’re pretty sure the architects looked down at their crotches for inspiration. In honor of the structures that remind us of our boyfriends, here are The Seven Phallic Wonders of The Modern World. Keep reading »
To properly celebrate our nation’s birth, you must do these three things tomorrow: grill food, watch fireworks, and wear something (anything) that involves stars or stripes. We’re here to help you with the third. Now, you have a couple options. You can go all out and wear only an American flag draped around your body, or you can be a little more subtle, and put on something you already own — or needed an excuse to run out and buy today. While you’re at it, don’t forget to pick up a pack of sparklers. Keep reading »