“im ashamed to have to be grouped into the same category of person as you. I would rather die a most painful death the be assoicated with the kind of careere your trying to make for your self. I hope i’m wrong because generally i’m not a very judgmental person, but in the case of you, that is MY entitlement.”

—Frances Bean Cobain in an “Open Letter to Ali Lohan” posted on her Twitter, which has since been deleted. Read the whole missive here.

How do you support your hot mess of a sister’s Paris Fashion Week debut? In a hot mess of a dress, of course! [Paris, 10/4/09]

I don’t know about you guys, but this has already been the longest week ever and I could use a vacay. But since that’s out of the question, we’ll have to take a vacation with our minds. What better way to do that than indulge in some trashy tabloid drama? We did the dirty work and packaged the headlines in short, easy-to-read blurbs, cause we like you that much!

Most girls want to be just like their big sisters, right? Well, that can be hard when your big sis is big time. Miley Cyrus’ little sister, Noah, is only nine, but she’s already showing signs of becoming a mini-Miley. Exhibit A: her YouTube series “Noie and Em.” Exhibit B: the fact that she goes by Noie, which sounds an awful lot like Miley. Exhibit C: the other day, Noie was photographed on the red carpet wearing a pink Juicy Couture dress, way too much mascara, and pounding a Red Bull. Supposedly, Noie has her sights set on Disney, like someone we know. “I love my sister Miley,” she said. “When I grow up I want to be just like her.” Right, because Miley is so grown up herself.

After the jump, an ode to the little sisters of Hollywood.

Yesterday, Amelia noticed something different about Ali Lohan’s physique, so that got me thinking about how breasts, or a lack thereof, can affect a young starlet’s rise to fame. Here’s a list of celebs whose breasts have affected their careers.

• Soleil Moon Frye is best known for her role as Punky in the television sitcom Punky Brewster. When she was 16, Soleil had breast reduction surgery, going from 36DD to 34C because she had back problems. But knowing our culture, I think she also wanted to be taken seriously as an actress and later as a director.
• To me, Raven-Symone represents a normal body size. She has curves that are proportional to her height, and she’s one of a few thick girls catering to the preteen girl demographic. But every time I watch That’s So Raven, I wonder why her breasts and the rest of her torso are always covered because it makes her look larger than she really is. Then I realized this is a technique to make Raven, 22, look more like a teenager for her roles on that show and in The Cheetah Girls movies. But choosing to cover her curves has led to a malicious debate online: Is Raven fat or all breasts?

Something has changed about the Living Lohan star, and I can’t put my nipple, I mean, finger on it. [Left: March 2008, Right: July 2008]

Just an FYI, Ali Lohan is not 35 years old, she’s 14. She’s the sister of Lindsay Lohan, and stars in Living Lohan alongside her “momager” Dina and younger brother Cody. Ali wants to be a pop star just like Linz! We wonder if she wanted to be a chain smoker too. That would explain the raspy barely pubescent voice.