“There is no justice for drunk women,” begins Andrea Peysner’s New York Post column, “It’s Open Season For Predators In Uniform,” about the acquittal of a cop accused of raping a drunk woman in her apartment. “A Manhattan jury yesterday had to decide whom it hated more: a rotten police officer who admitted he lied, cheated, cuddled, kissed and groped a drunken woman. Or the woman herself … But there never was any contest. The jury loathed her on sight.” Peysner, it should be noted, is known for her extremely conservative views. I generally consider her a wack job, so I was shocked to read that she was just as appalled as I am by the results of this case.
As a young woman who has also been drunk on many occasions, this case has resonated deeply with me. It has, in particular, reminded me of a night I had eight years ago. I am now wondering how a jury of my peers would have judged me had the night gone differently. Keep reading »
“I have a great hangover cure. I take a cold shower in the morning and then I go into the sauna and drink a lot of water throughout the day. Green tea also helps!”
—Gwyneth Paltrow on how she recovers from a night of drinking. That sounds nice … if I had access to a sauna. For those of us who don’t have spas in our homes, I have my own hangover remedy: a hamburger (or a slice of pizza, whichever is in closer proximity), a Diet Coke, a large bottle of water, and as many Advil as I can handle. Once I get myself vertical, a jog around the block always sets me straight. Share your hangover cures in the comments — or tweet them using the hashtag #poorwomanscure. [Us Weekly] Keep reading »
Speaking of strange beauty advice
from celebrities, Kelly Bensimon
is probably not a reliable source for anything other than acting a fool on reality TV. But girlfriend does
have great hair, so her “DIY Hair Cocktail” recipe is worth a listen. Kelly posted a YouTube video of herself on massaging olive oil, salt, lemon and vodka into her locks — supposedly on the advice of her hairdresser pal, who promised it’d give Kelly’s ‘do a “beachy” look. Sounds more like a “drunky” look to me. Any idea if vodka/lemon/salt/olive oil works — or does it just make you smell like a sorority girl on her 21st birthday? Kelly stops the video before we see the results! [YouTube
] Keep reading »
Oh, yes, ladies, cupcake vodka is an actual thing! Cupcake Vineyards sells 14 wines but also vodkas with “creamy cupcake undertones.” OK, we’re listening. Cupcake vodka comes in four delicious flavors, including original, vanilla frosting, chocolate devil’s food, and lemon chiffon. Obviously the Cupcake Vodka PR people need to send The Frisky sample bottles so we can — hiccup! — deliver a full review to our readers. [Cupcake Vodka via The Hairpin] Keep reading »
A new study done at the University of Texas at Austin found that alcohol may actually make you smarter. But how is this possible when I act so dumb after a few, you ask? Well, researchers found that alcohol impairs certain parts of the brain while it stimulates others. When alcohol hits your bloodstream, dopamine is released, which acts as a learning aid for our brains. So, while you may forget the name of the dude you made out with while intoxicated, your subconscious synapses will be popping off like firecrackers. And when you wake up the next day with a hangover, you will have learned never to drink that much again. Aren’t you smart. [UPI] Keep reading »
“I am on the drunk diet. I live my life as I want to, creatively. I like to drink whiskey and stuff while I am working. But the deal is I’ve got to work out every day, and I work out hung over if I am hung over. And it’s about the cross-training and keeping yourself inspired. I have to say, I do a ton of yoga.”
—Lady Gaga tells People magazine how she keeps in shape. Right, because there’s nothing like Downward Dogging with a throbbing headache and the smell of whiskey seeping from your pores. In the same interview, Gaga reveals that her hair is falling out. This diet might be one reason why. [PopEater] Keep reading »
You know there’s a problem when … your toddler needs to be treated for alcohol addiction and alcohol abuse. The UK’s National Health Service reports that the youngest patient they’ve treated for alcohol addiction was three years old. They are not releasing any further info on the patient’s identity to protect his or her confidentiality. This is not a typo. They didn’t mean to say 13-year-old. How do you even discover such a thing? Mommy and daddy caught little Jane sneaking vodka into her daily apple juice sippy cup? Someone please explain to me how a three-year-old can be an alcoholic. My brain can’t comprehend. [Google News] Keep reading »
Even if you’re currently on a drinking sabbatical, there’s no time like the present to start thinking about how to make your next glass of wine the best it can be. Everyone knows that wine that has been allowed to breathe tastes better than popping open a bottle and immediately chugging away. But who wants to wait 10 minutes for a fresh bottle to aerate? Not us winos! That’s why the Vinturi Essential Wine Aerator is a boozehound’s best friend. Open a bottle of red, hold the decanter over your glass and pour away — in the process, the Vinturi “creates an increase in the wine’s velocity and a decrease in its pressure,” resulting in a perfectly aerated glass of vino in the time it takes to pour. Who’s thirsty?
File this under really bad things that can happen when you drink too much. Picture this: You are fast asleep one night, minding your own business, catching up on your REM, when suddenly you are awoken by a strange woman who somehow managed to get into your apartment, take all of her clothes off, slip into bed next to you, and pass out. This actually happened to one unfortunate Canadian man. Around 3 a.m. this past weekend, a woman, who happened to live in his building on a different floor, managed to open his door using her key. She was so intoxicated that she didn’t notice she was in the wrong apartment crashing in the wrong bed. The terrified dude called the cops and she was escorted upstairs to her actual bed to sleep it off. I don’t even want to know what her hangover was like. [UPI] Keep reading »
After much thought and Advil, I have decided I am going on a sex/dating and drinking sabbatical. I went on a six-month sex sabbatical after my breakup from my fiance a few years ago — or, rather, I announced I was going on a six-month sex sabbatical and then it lasted for, I think, around two. It wasn’t a complete failure, in other words. Hilariously, I went on a sex sabbatical because all of my efforts to get laid were being thwarted and I figured I might as well decide to NOT have sex with a purpose.
Meanwhile, I have never taken a significant break from drinking. I didn’t start drinking until I was in college — I believe most people start in high school, so I was a late bloomer in more ways than one — and I remember the night I got drunk the first time as well as you can possibly remember a hazy night 13 years ago. The amount and frequency of my drinking has gone up and down over the years, but I generally consider myself to be a responsible boozer. I don’t drink and drive (easy when you don’t have a car!), I don’t say things I don’t mean, and, for the most part, I don’t do things I actually regret. Keep reading »