What to say, oh, what to say about an anonymous Thought Catalogue essay that starts, “From the beginning we knew our relationship looked like a cliché—perhaps plucked from a boring episode of ‘Mad Men.’ You, my 21-year-old millennial intern, me, your 30-something married boss with two kids”?
“To The Millennial I Left For My Wife (And 8 Parting Words Of Advice)” is a hate-read from the first line. Sadly, it only gets much, much more hate-able as it goes on. I don’t mean to spoil the surprise for you, but this wannabe modern day Don Draper leaves his wife and two kids for his millennial intern. They have a few great “magical” and “addictive” weeks together “dancing on the dock of a river” and stealing kisses in an elevator. But soon, everything goes to hell in a hand basket. Why? Oh, because “serious differences emerged from the shadows” and “common backgrounds also forged common problems.” God, I HATE when that happens. Keep reading »
Mmkay, you remember who Lindsay Lohan is, right? And Heath Ledger? So you, like me, might find it a little bit hard to believe — as Lohan is now claiming in a recently unearthed private diary — that she was dating Heath Ledger at the time of his death in 2008. Annnnnnnd that he was the love of her life. Keep reading »
Yesterday, The Los Angeles Times gave us several details about the woman with whom Arnold Schwarzenegger fathered a child while he was married to Maria Shriver. We know that the child is more than 10-years-old since this all went down “over a decade ago.” We know that the mother worked for Arnold and Maria for 20 years and retired sometime in 2011. Gawker eked ahead in the race to identify this former Schwarzenegger staff member yesterday when they claimed she was Tammy Tousignant, a flight attendant on Arnold’s private jet for many years. (Could Arnold be a member of the Mile High Club?) Apparently, the Daily Mail UK broke this story … way back in 2003, before Arnold was voted into the California governor’s mansion. Reporter Mary Leigh wrote eight years ago:
“Schwarzenegger is facing new and damaging claims that he also cheated on Maria with a voluptuous California blonde named Tammy Baker Tousignant. Tammy was in her late 20s when Schwarzenegger first strode on to the chartered private plane on which she was flight attendant. He was instantly beguiled by her, and soon, according to several sources, they became romantically involved. ‘Everyone knew that she was Arnold’s lover—everyone,’ said a source.”
According to the story, three sources claim that Tammy bragged about her son, Tanner—who conveniently bares the name of Arnold’s character in “Total Recall” and is now in college and—being Arnold’s.
Buuuuut, there’s a problem. Keep reading »
We knew there had to be something that wasn’t being said when Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver announced last week that they were splitting after 25 years of marriage. Now, the Los Angeles Times brings us the truth—Arnold recently told Maria that he had an affair years ago with a member of their household staff. And, uh, that he fathered a baby with her. Presumably a baby Maria knew well since this was a longtime staff member. “After leaving the governor’s office I told my wife about this event, which occurred over a decade ago,” Arnold explained. “I understand and deserve the feelings of anger and disappointment among my friends and family. There are no excuses and I take full responsibility for the hurt I have caused. I have apologized to Maria, my children and my family. I am truly sorry.” Keep reading »
Last summer, I fell in love with my boxing teacher. I never kissed him. I never spent time alone with him. Though I did have mental sex with him at least a thousand times, and was only left with goose bumps and a weakened mind.
The first time I went to class, Mike wrapped my hands and told me he’d seen me around. He smiled his glowing smile and I thought he looked nice. I couldn’t put my gloves on, but he was more than happy to help. Keep reading »
“Here’s the bottom line: It was a very challenging time for everybody involved. But I loved and missed my family too much not to make it work. Rosetta is understanding enough and spiritual enough to let us try.”
—Balthazar Getty tells Harper’s Bazaar about going back home to his wife after having an affair with Sienna Miller. You’re a very lucky dude that it was even an option, Balthy. [Huffington Post] Keep reading »
The thing about huge jerks is that, because they are huge jerks, they will find every opportunity to avoid responsibility for how out-of-control their jerkitude has gotten. This is perhaps why Gabriella Nagy is suing the Canadian phone company Rogers Wireless for $600,000 for sending her cell phone records along with her and her husband’s regular phone bill, which subsequently led to him discovering that she was having an affair. Nagy complained that, “The thing that really hurt me is that it all came out not through my own doing.” Because, obviously, the phone company had the affair on her behalf. Keep reading »
The March issue of Marie Claire has a brief Q&A called “The Breakup Artist” with Boston-based divorce lawyer Gerald Nissenbaum, who’s so good at his job he charges upwards of $700 an hour and gets his clients nine-figure settlements. He’s also pretty good at preventing those high-payout settlements, too, when the occasion fits. The mag got Nissenbaum to share some of his advice on preventing divorces and what not to do when divorcing, but I found his advice on affairs to be the most interesting. Although Nissenbaum says most affairs aren’t about love and aren’t worth risking a marriage, he says the relationship must remain a secret and even gives tips on how to keep it that way. Keep reading »
Breaking news: Tiger Woods, his wife and his mistress might all actually be 8th graders. They’re sure acting like it!
Sources tell The Daily Beast that right before The National Enquirer printed a story about Woods’ affair with Rachel Uchitel, he warned Elin Nordegren about the story and put her on the phone with Uchitel, assuming she could convince his wife that there was no affair. Their cover story, apparently, was that Woods and Uchitel had only met once or twice on social occasions. (Buddy, when your wife believes your mistress’s word before she believes your word, you have problems.) Nordegren allegedly once spoke on the phone with Uchitel for half an hour, but didn’t completely believe the hooey that their relationship was platonic. Sources say that the couple bickered about an alleged affair on Thanksgiving night until Woods allegedly got tired of bickering and popped an Ambien to fall asleep. Keep reading »