In the last six years that I’ve worked full-time on ye olde internet, blogging about, amongst other things, TV, there is one particularly common directive I’ve heard in our comments section, via email and on Facebook and Twitter that drives me absolutely bat shit nuts: “NO SPOILERS!!!” I suspect that this isn’t going to earn me much fan mail, but I can’t take it anymore, I just have to say it: If a TV show is spoiled for you, chances are pretty goddamn good it’s your own fault and, well, I have very little sympathy for your plight. Sorry! Rather than telling the rest of the internet — which is full of people who, unfortunately, do not know you or particularly care about you — “NO SPOILERS” and expecting them to contort themselves to whatever your viewing timeline happens to be, I suggest you take the following precautions: Keep reading »
This weekend in the New York Times Social Q’s column, a woman wrote in to inquire about how to handle a ruthless grandma who is obsessed with her six-month-old granddaughter’s weight:
My husband and I have a beautiful 6-month-old daughter. She is chubby but not overweight by any means. My mother-in-law, who obviously has a weight obsession and is quite thin, has started making comments about my daughter’s size: “I can’t believe her legs are so big when she kicks all the time.” Or: “She’ll thin out when she starts to crawl.” My husband knows that these comments bother me, but he will not address them with her. I want to protect my daughter from her grandmother’s damaging and unhealthy fixation with weight. What should I do?
Okay, what kind of sick person body snarks a six-month-old baby? I don’t have kids, so I might be wrong about this, but aren’t babies supposed to be fat? I did not know that having a fat six-month-old was a problem you could have. Keep reading »
Meet our friend Tom. He’s a married guy with tons of relationship experience, and a skilled advice giver who’s here to answer all your pressing sex, dating and relationship questions. Have a query for Tom? Email him! All questions will be posted anonymously, unless otherwise requested. First up…
I’m 32 and married with two young children. Recently I reconnected with one of my best friends from 20 years ago online. We have always had strong feelings for each other and after high school checked in on each other a few times throughout the years. But because we’ve always been with other people, we respected those boundaries. He has always been verbal about his feeling though I haven’t. We have been able to talk to each other like no one else. In February I went to visit him and the feelings were too intense for both of us. We talked everyday, he repeatedly told me he loved me and wanted to know did I love him (although he is also married with two kids). Eventually it got physical. We had a conversation once about him not wanting to hurt anyone else involved … he says there were are so many people who could get hurt if we were to leave our spouses (which is what I wanted). I asked him to just for once consider our feelings, because we never have, and for a few weeks it was great. Then the last time I saw him we had sex. He called me 30 minutes later to tell me how much he loved me and hasn’t returned a call or email since then. I just want him to tell me that he fell out of love, or he thinks we were in the wrong. Or whatever the reason was … Why won’t he at least do that? If you could see the look in his eyes when he told me he loved me, I know he wasn’t lying. I’m still in love with him. He knows I have never ever cheated before and I only did it because it was him. How do I get over this? Why would a man just disappear from someone he loves and should I expect him to come back? Please help me.
Dude, this is brutal.
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When it comes to female friendships, subtlety, nuance and innuendo are everything. We’ve tried to explain this to the men in our lives but they never seem to understand. They’ll say something like, “Well, if Jane was a bitch to you at brunch last weekend, why are you going to dinner with her tonight?” You’ll sigh and then go on for 20 minutes about how you’ve known her since you were 11 and her mom died when she was in high school and that screwed her up. But she makes you laugh your ass off most of the time … when she’s not being passive aggressive as all get out. In the end, you love her and would be devastated if you never talked to her again. So you’re basically going to have to suck it up whatever put downs she might hurl your way at dinner. Keep reading »
Breaking up with a friend is a very dramatic and emotionally trying process. It’s not much different than breaking up with a girlfriend or boyfriend, in fact, it may actually be worse since we tend to be closer and know friends much longer than many of our romantic relationships. I’ve had a few friendship breakups and they freaking sucked but were necessary in order to prevent me from going insane. The first time I had to divorce a friend was just a couple of years ago. (There had been many breakups in this friendship beforehand.)
I had been friends with the same chica since I was eleven years old and by the time we were in high school people on the street would come up to us and ask us if we were twins. We look nothing alike but our mannerism, the way we could speak with gestures and looks yet without words and the way we dressed had become so similar people thought we were related. Read more on College Candy…
Meet our friend Tom. He’s a married guy with tons of relationship experience, and a skilled advice giver who’s here to answer all your pressing sex, dating and relationship questions. Have a query for Tom? Email it to email@example.com and we’ll make sure he gets it! All questions will be posted anonymously, unless otherwise requested. First up…
“I’ve been spending a lot of time with one of my guy friends. I’m starting to have feelings for him, and suspect he might have feelings for me too. How do I know for sure that he’s feeling something more than friendship and how do I go about bringing up the subject without being too weird?”
My first instinct was: “Ask him out, you chicken.” But that’s a mistake. When a man successfully asks a girl out, it’s the greatest he ever feels. The birth of his first child will be a huge disappointment in comparison. Like “Matrix: Reloaded.” Success with women is a male emotional speedball. Imagine how good River Phoenix felt right before the end. It feels THAT good. So you cannot deny him this. Plus, his emotional overdose is fuel for the rest of the relationship. Let him ride the dragon and he’ll chase it all the way up the aisle. Keep reading »