Let me tell you about a thing that happened to me once: It was 2004. and I was 25 and out to dinner with a guy I’d been casually seeing for awhile. I was under the impression that, following our post-dinner drinks, we’d be going back to his place so we could … pick your euphemism why don’t you: Do the horizontal mambo, do it, bone. But then, as we exited the bar, he was all, “Well, I should really be getting home.”
I took this as an indication that he was shy – unsure of whether or not I was in the mood – and so I took it upon myself to throw my arms around his neck and say, “Whaaaaat? Nooooo! Don’t you want to have sex with me tonight? It’ll be … fun!”
Then I burped accidentally. I’m talking, like, right in his face. Keep reading »
Vagina Killer (vah-ji´nah kil′ər) noun: 1. The thing that an otherwise acceptable man can do or say on a date to ensure that he will never get into your pants. Ever.
Vagina killers will stop the mojo of any good date dead in its tracks. For example, say you’re on a date with a perfectly charming, perfectly smart, perfectly handsome, perfectly eligible man. Ah, you think. A normal man at last. A good conversation. A nice dinner. Things are going well! And then he drops the one bomb that will ensure your vagina is closed for business to him for all eternity. Like he tells you that all he needs in his life is his cat; in fact, they are best friends and they do everything together. For a non-allergic cat lover, that might be a vagina awakener, but for me, a very allergic, non-cat loving person: vagina DOA. I’m sorry, Guy — you were in the running before you KILLED MY VAGINA.The point being, vagina killers are very personal and specific, but we all have them. Remember, your goal is to keep that vagina alive so you can meet her in person! After the jump, some more deadly vagina killers to avoid at all costs. Please share yours in the comments.
Keep reading »
As I’ve mentioned before, I’m a slob. Cleaning is one of my least favorite activities in the world, and I get the urge to tidy up about as often as I get the urge to, oh, I don’t know, relive middle school. But over the course of the last year I’ve made a dedicated effort to get better at it, and slowly but surely, I’ve become a fairly consistent doer of chores. If you’re not naturally prone to neatness, you know how tough it can be to put away the dishes or pick up a duster. To help you out, here are five tips, tricks, and strategies that have helped me tackle that terrible, awful job called cleaning the house… Keep reading »
I feel a responsibility to let you know when I spend a stupid amount of time on any given Tumblr. Today, I have dedicated myself to Yo, Should I Dump This Asshole? It’s pretty self explanatory: people ask if they should dump the asshole they’re dating and Yo responds. I’ve compiled a few of my favorites here. The guy who likes Ayn Rand but gives good BJs? Yo says dump. Not so sure I agree. The guy who doesn’t like trees or sun? DUMP FOR SURE. The guy who’s convinced he’s a vampire? Who’s asking? I can’t even. I wish this site was around when I went out with the guy who said all he needed in life was the company of his cat. I would have loved to see Yo’s response. Obviously, I dumped this man. I hate cats. [The Hairpin]
I’ve been with my boyfriend for two years now and this past month, we saw each other a lot more frequently (i.e. every day) since my parents weren’t in town. Essentially, we were pretty much living together for that month. We would see each other after classes, go out to eat together, make dinner, etc. I feel that from this past month, I can sense that he is not as affectionate to me as we used to be — after sex, we would just go to sleep and not really cuddle). Little things he does are starting to bother me too, like laziness. It’s nothing major, but I guess it’s something you really see with time.
Is it normal to feel like you’re a little more disconnected when you’re living together vs. not? It’s only temporary, so I’m not sure if this is a sign of things in our future if we were to get married? Read more …
Ahhhh, you’re in a new relationship and all things seem so wonderful! You may be feeling those butterflies in your stomach, you laugh at all your partner’s jokes, and all feel warm and tingly inside. This is the time that you truly feel and believe that you may have met the right one!
Maybe he seems to display all the qualities about what women really want in a man. But, we’ve also been there and done that. All new relationships feel great, which is why we call it the honeymoon phase. Read more …