Tag Archives: advice

Decode My Dream: I Can’t Stop Dreaming About My Deadbeat Baby Daddy!

Three years ago I became pregnant with my son and the father was my then-boyfriend. The day I told him I was pregnant, he hit the road and I didn’t hear from him until my son was three weeks old. He stuck around for a month and then hit the road again, just as quickly as he came back. Since then, the only contact I’ve had with him is via e-mail, until he decided to delete that e-mail address so I could no longer contact him. He is a doctor, not just some deadbeat with no money, so finding him is relatively easy. Over the past two and a half years, he’s pulled some extremely hurtful moves and it goes without saying that I obviously hate him. Well the past few months, I’ve been having tons of dreams about him, where we secretly get back together even though we know it’s wrong. We’re flirty, happy, lovey dovey, having fun, and hanging out with friends like we used to. When I wake up, I feel sick about the idea of ever being romantic or even friendly towards him again. I’m also mad at myself for having these dreams and letting him have any control over me whatsoever, even in my subconscious. Why am I having dreams about him and what do they mean? – Bedbeat

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How To Survive Holidays In Transition

Sure, the holidays are filled with great food, fun parties, and general good cheer (I was at a crowded Macy’s yesterday, and I wasn’t shoved once!), but for a lot of people, this is anything but the most wonderful time of year. Those of us in periods of transition — even positive ones — are especially susceptible to the feelings of loneliness, frustration, depression, and the stress the holidays can elicit. After the jump, a few tips for surviving the holidays during some of life’s biggest transitions. Keep reading »

A Newspaper’s Really Bad Advice For A 35-Year-Old Virgin

I felt really awful for this guy who wrote to Chicago Sun Times columnist Cheryl Lavin looking for help. Basic gist of his letter? He’s a 35-year-old virgin who just wants to “get the monkey off his back.” Fine if it’s a religious or moral choice, but sadly for this dude, it is not. So what did Cheryl suggest for this sexless man?

“I have a feeling your unhappiness over your virginity is inhibiting you with woman. What if you went at it the other way? What if you lost your virginity first, then tried to have a connection with a woman? Your whole personality on a date might blossom. Prostitution is legal in some counties in Nevada. And even where it’s illegal, it’s widespread.”

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Is It A Dealbreaker If Your Man Says “No” To Sweats?

Check out this question sent to the Washington Post‘s Style Editor:

“Dear Carolyn: So I’ve been casually dating this guy from work. There’s so much chemistry between us, he’s funny and smart, and I think I’m starting to fall for him. But something he said at dinner irked me — he made some comment about how un-sexy sweat pants are, and how if the person he’s dating ever wears them, it’s a ‘dealbreaker.’ Well, so far he’s never seen me in sweat pants. But I wear them; they’re comfortable around the house. I asked, ‘What if a person is feeling sick or just lounging around their apartment?’ He made a grimace that said, ‘Still not okay.’ I just feel unsettled now. He does pay a lot of attention to what I wear and suggests clothes that will make me look better. Personal quirk or red flag?”

Yikes! We’ll say this: It’s definitely a dealbreaker for us when A) a dude tries to tell us what to wear and B) any man, woman, child or beast attempts to deprive us of sweet, sweet sweat-pant-ed lounging sessions. So much more advice, after the jump. Keep reading »

Ashley Dupre Gives Good … Advice?

Ashley Dupre deserves some credit for turning her notoriety as Eliot Spitzer’s favorite lady of the night into a full-scale career. First, there was her pop song “What We Want,” which blogs hailed as “not half bad.” Then came her reality TV show deal, and her turn as a model at NY Fashion Week. Now, Ashley is showing off her writing chops. The New York Post has given her a weekly column called “Ask Ashley,” which reminds us of the genius advice column with Spencer Pratt that appeared in Radar for the few issues before it folded. Not only did Ashley rock glasses and a button-down shirt in her author photo—no more bikinis for this classy girl. But, uh, Ashley’s advice is actually shockingly astute. Read the excerpts after the jump. Keep reading »

10 Things Guys Should Do On A First Date

Ah, first dates. So nerve-wracking. If only you knew exactly what was going to happen, then you could plan out everything in advance. But first dates are kind of like playing the lottery. You gotta be in it to win it, but sometimes you end up empty-handed. If you’re a woman, you know these sort of situations don’t always go so smoothly. If you’re a guy, here are 10 tips that can make the first date easier on all of us. Keep reading »

The 7 Deadly Sins Of Dating

Sometimes dating is pure joy—basking in the thrill of meeting a potential Mr. Right can be exciting and energizing. But other times, dating is a chore. It’s discouraging—after so many people you should have clicked with someone by now, right? How come your relationships don’t last—or never even get started? Keep reading »

10 Things Guys Should Never Say If They Ever Want To See You Again

Ah, men. So endearing. So easily confused. We know we women aren’t the easiest people in the world to figure out, and it’s all too easy for a guy to open his mouth and say something that’s an instant dealbreaker. Whether the subject is sex, weight, or love, here are a few lines that should send you ladies running for the hills if you hear them from your dude. Feel free to add yours in the comments! Keep reading »

Bad Breakup? 10 Things To Remember

He’s the perfect height. He has perfect hands. You love his sister. You love his scent. How can you be with someone who doesn’t know how to play the tuba? Or speak French? He is perfect and everything about him is perfect by association. The problem is he doesn’t want to be with you. And now you’re never going to find love again. Right? Wrong. Here is what you need to remember: Keep reading »

Roofied Letter Writer Responds To Lucinda Rosenfeld’s Advice

Not to beat this story dead, but a commenter pointed out that the “Friend Or Foe” letter writer has responded to Lucinda Rosenfeld’s advice — on Double X! Here’s a portion of what she wrote and we would like to say, “YOU GO GIRL.”

“For the record, I really was roofied, ma’am. The idea that I must provide you with a tox screen to prove it is galling … But in the end, I don’t need your advice after all—I figured it out all by myself. Ten years of friendship is a long time, but I was clinging to an institution and a bond that these women abandoned years ago. Perhaps we continued to see each other socially because it was easier than forging new bonds. I’m not sure. For now, these women might be in my social circle due to our vast network of mutual friends, but they are certainly not the close confidantes I once thought I had. P.S. The day I rely more on a boyfriend than on a best girlfriend is the day I lose hope for womankind.”

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