Tag Archives: advice

20 Things I Wish I Knew In My 20s

In two weeks, I am turning 32. My 20s are officially long gone. I was thinking the other day about what I was up to when I was 21. I immediately thought of Marcy, an acting teacher I had at the time. Marcy was 39 and I remember her seeming so much older and wiser than me. I would go to class and cry about dudes or not knowing what to do with my life or being broke and Marcy would do the same thing every time. She would pat me on the back and say in her nasally voice, “Nobody tells you your 20s are going to suck.” While I do wish she had expounded a bit, her words made me feel better in a strange way. Just knowing that things would get better, well, not better exactly, just easier to deal with, was a relief. In your 20s, you don’t know what you don’t know and you’re struggling to figure it out. Everyone is. As I march bravely forward into my 30s, here’s what I wish Marcy would have told me. Keep reading »

Dear Wendy Updates: “Concerned Friend” Responds

It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from “Concerned Friend” whose pal was obsessed with becoming pregnant, despite (or because of) recent medical issues that made it difficult to conceive. CF wondered how she could be the best friend to her pal during this time — whether she should be realistic with her or “feed into her hope that she’s pregnant.” After the jump, found out how both she and her friend are doing today. Keep reading »

7 Perfectly Acceptable Reasons To Blow Someone Off

I try, try try my very hardest never to blow anyone off. I mean, being on the receiving end of a blow-off totally sucks, and I don’t take pleasure in hurting another person’s feelings. I believe that honesty is the best policy and if I need to break up with someone (romantically or otherwise), I try to give them a reason why, straight-up … well, most of the time. There are some instances when I feel perfectly justified in pulling the old duck and run. Find out what they are after the jump. Keep reading »

How To Go To A Party Alone

It’s holiday time again, which for me means lots of parties to go to … solo. My first instinct is usually to try to snag a pal to bring with me to party crash, but recently, I was invited to a party where the host explicitly instructed guests not to bring a plus one. I was dreading showing up there, thinking it would be uncomfortable, but once I arrived, I embraced it and ended up having a great time. After I deftly extricated myself from a dull conversation with an awkward woman with a neck twitch, I hit it off with a group of dudes with nerdy glasses who shared my love of stupid dance moves. Needless to say, I have a new appreciation for going to parties alone. After the jump, some tips for making the best of a stag situation. Add your suggestions in the comments. Keep reading »

8 Ways To Get Closure When A Relationship Ends

8 Ways To Get Closure

If anyone ever figured out how to bottle the ability to achieve closure after a relationship ends, they would be rich and famous. As someone who has stumbled in finding closure a few times in my life, all I can say for sure is how it feels. It feels peaceful; it feels freeing, like taking a rock out of your shoe. It is the moment a chapter in the book of your life has been written, read, reread, and filed away for posterity. No matter what the situation, closure is a feeling that comes from within. Sometimes you have the other person there to debrief with and that can be helpful, like when I met up with an ex-boyfriend to compare notes on our relationship. It was an incredibly therapeutic experience that helped me close the door on the relationship once and for all. But let’s be honest, it hardly ever happens like that … Keep reading »

My Difficult Relatives And How I Will Deal With Them This Thanksgiving

Ah, Thanksgiving. When you’re a kid it’s all about the mashed potatoes and pumpkin pie. When you’re an adult, it’s all about rude inquisitions from your nosy aunts and your dad getting horrifically, embarassingly wasted. I don’t know anything about stuffing a bird or making a perfect cranberry sauce. But I do know a thing or two about dealing with family, seeing as I have a huge, colorful one. Gather ’round, children, and take in my wisdom from awkward family holidays past! (Also, I’m a full-blooded WASP, so take my stiff-upper-lip swamp Yankee suggestions with a grain of salt. Maybe in other parts of the country, you solve problems differently!) Keep reading »

10 Tips For Surviving A Bad Day

Happy Have A Bad Day Day! I realize that doesn’t sound like a nice thing to say, but I’m looking out for your own good. You’re going to have a crappy day today. Don’t worry, I am too, but be happy that it’s Friday and if things aren’t going your way, I’ve got ten surefire tips for surviving a bad day. And don’t worry, the sun will come out tomorrow. You can bet your bottom dollar on it. Keep reading »

Dear Wendy Updates: “Teaching Class” Responds

It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from “Teaching Class,” a young teacher who worries that another young teacher in her school was making a fool of herself by acting too quirky. “Part of me wants to go and have a gentle conversation with ‘Jane’ about professionalism, especially since I think it is hurting her relationship with her students in addition to staff, but I wouldn’t know what to say.” I advised “Teaching Class” to let a supervisor be the one to talk professionalism with Jane, and instead, seek out her friendship if she was so inclined. After the jump, find out if she followed that advice. Keep reading »

Girl Talk: When An Advice Columnist Finds Herself At A Career Crossroads

Over the weekend, my husband and I took a trip to New Orleans where we indulged in delicious, rich food, probably a few too many Hurricanes, and lots of roaming around and sight-seeing. At one point during the weekend, Drew was in the shower, and I took the opportunity to get online to check my email. Of course, one rarely just checks email when she’s online, and before I knew it, I had wandered over to The Frisky and taken a peek at my weekend Dear Wendy columns (written prior to my trip) and subsequent reader comments. Big mistake. What had been a really nice vacation up to that point suddenly turned into a minor existential crisis — at least for the next hour or so as I brooded over “the point of it all.” Keep reading »

10 Most Common Non-Negotiables

Last week Frisky staffers shared our lists of the five non-negotiables when it comes to looking for a potential partner, and we asked you in the Friskyverse to share yours. We so enjoyed your lists that we thought we’d compile them into a greatest hits, if you will. After the jump, the definitive list of your ten most common non-negotiables. Keep reading »

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