For those of us who have a gay boyfriend in our lives, we know how to gross them out in five seconds flat. I have a list of words that I know I can say to mine that will make him squirm and run around the room, screaming like a school girl—vagina, p**sy, c**t, clit, moist. My favorite line of questioning with my gay boyfriend is about the one time in college that he had drunken sex with a girl before he was out. Each time I press him for details he says things like, “I don’t really remember,” or “I only put it in there for a second,” or “Ewwwwwwww!” His experience of straight sex is not unlike Adam Lambert’s recent account in Out magazine. When asked about performing oral sex on a woman, he gave this eloquent description of the experience:

“It was a little gross because I don’t think she was as clean as she could’ve been. It wasn’t the act of it that really turned me off. I don’t really remember. I was 18 and I was drunk.”

When I saw this album cover, before my first cup of coffee for the day, I thought this was Pink going through a blue period. But nope, it’s the cover for Adam Lambert‘s first album, For Your Entertainment. Folks on the interwebs are calling it “glamtastic,” but I think it’s a few steps beyond that—homedude got in a time machine, traveled back to the ‘80s, went to the mall for a Glamour Shot, and paid extra for the “extreme airbrushing” package. Do you like this cover, or think it’s way over the top?

So ... when Hollywood starlets want to be provocative, they lez out in photoshoots. And apparently, when gay men want to be provocative they tongue female models? Color us confused by this Details cover shoot featuring “American Idol” runner-up, Adam Lambert. Lambert is an out-and-proud gay man, but tells the mag, “...I like kissing women sometimes. Women are pretty. It doesn’t mean I’m necessarily sleeping with them.” Personally, I wouldn’t have minded a shot or two of Glambert frenching his hot boyfriend, but then again, I sometimes like gay dude porn. So what do you think of this racy shoot? Sexy or cheap? Check out one more shot, after the jump. [Details]

You may have heard that rabid fans of “American Idol” runner-up Adam Lambert have taken to throwing sex toys at the singer when he’s on stage. It started out as the usual bras and panties. Then, things got kinky. Handcuffs. Whips. Dildos. You name it; they pummel him with it. At first, Lambert said, it was “exciting,” but when he almost got hit in the head with a bra, he wasn’t so sure. Judging by what he does when a phallus lands on stage in this video, I’m guessing he’s really over it.

Adam Lambert claims he isn’t really into S&M, but that hasn’t stopped his fans from throwing glow-in-the-dark handcuffs and colorful whips onstage while he is performing. Granted, Lambert does dress like he’s into some freaky stuff but, really, sex toys? I doubt he’s going to get down with an object some random, screaming fan threw at him in a sweat-filled arena. [E! Online]

But musicians have been dodging weird objects while they rock out for quite some time. After the jump, find out what else has been known to fly through the air at concerts.

• Designer Alber Elbaz was so inspired by Glenn Close’s “Damages” character, he’s basing a new line of power suits on her. [NY Mag]—I hope Hillary is reading this!
• Adam Lambert is borrowing Lady Gaga’s producer, RedOne, to help him with his new album. [Perez]—We just hope Lambert doesn’t borrow Gaga’s style, as well.
• Congrats to Megan Fox, who has learned that sex sells. [The Sun]—Yes, Megan, baring your legs from hip to toe while flaunting perky breasts will get you noticed. Congrats on figuring that one out!

The secret’s out: cougars want to claw “American Idol” runner-up Adam Lambert, says blogger and self-proclaimed Lambert-lover Joan Raymond at Newsweek.com. According to her, confident women over the age of 40 are obsessed with the 27-year-old newly-outed singer. Overall, her reasons make sense, but the thing is, nothing she says explains why older women would react differently than, say, any teenybopper or “Idol” obsessed fan.

Adam Lambert is making losing “American Idol” look so, so good. Not only did he just ink a deal with RCA Records, which plans to unleash his first album early next fall. But he also scored a spot on this week’s cover of Rolling Stone looking super glamtastic. He has a neon green snake on his leg that is inches away from his crotch, eying it like a sex-crazed maniac. (Oh man, that snake is getting more action than I am.) In his interview, Adam says that (shocker) he is gay. He waited until this interview to come out because he though it would be cooler to unleash the secret to Rolling Stone rather than to some local newspaper. Adam said a “psychedelic experience” while experimenting with “certain fungeses” that made him realize “Idol” was his chance for fame. After the jump, the choicest quotes from the interview.  [Rolling Stone]

We (almost) feel bad for celebs sometimes. For famous peeps, like Katherine McPhee, getting chased down by the ‘razzi on the mean streets of California is part of everyday life. But what’s a celeb to do when the cameras are rolling and their manicured feet just won’t move fast enough in those $8,000 stilettos? Well, fortuantely for celebs in swanky Beverly Hills, a certain homeless woman is willing to come a-running when things start to heat up. This woman, who goes by the name Quween on the Scene, curses, lurches, and yells threats until the paparazzi leave her celebrity friends alone. Check out these videos to see her in action.

This Sunday, the Broadway revival of the sexy ‘60s musical “Hair” is up for eight Tony Awards. You know they must be doing everything right! So, we decided to ask the hottest hippie in the show, young stud Theo Stockman, all about free love, pubic hair, and what it was like to shove his crotch in the face of “American Idol’s” Adam Lambert.

...and the young man clutching his hand seems to be in on the mustache trend! [West Hollywood, 6/1/09]

“American Idol” judge Kara DioGuardi appeared on “The View” today, and she was asked about runner-up Adam Lambert’s sexuality. Now, throughout the whole season of “American Idol,” people debated whether or not Adam was gay—his trademark look is gobs of glittery eye makeup, after all. However, the contestant never discussed his sexual preferences publicly. On “The View,” Kara said, “I don’t think Adam was ever in [the closet]. I think he was always openly out.”

Last week, when underdog Kris Allen won “American Idol” over clear favorite Adam Lambert, my jaw dropped. I wanted to call foul, but I didn’t have proof until today. According to the New York Times, last week’s “Idol” finale is the new 2000 election. They say the vote may have been unfairly rigged, thanks to some wheeling and dealing by AT&T, Idol’s main corporate sponsor. Recount in Arkansas! Please, thank you! After the jump, the sordid details.

The are two ways celebrities who need a little attention can guarantee publicity. Actually, scratch that, there are many ways celebs can get publicity, including sex tapes, pregnancy rumors, dramatic break-ups, and quickie marriages. But the two strategies that seem to be the most popular lately are the always-successful yo-yo dieting blitz, as perfected by Oprah, Jessica Simpson, Kirstie Alley, and Mariah Carey, and bad-mouthing another celeb on twitter or one’s personal blog.

You know that Queen song where they chant “no time for losers” really obnoxiously for, like, five minutes? Well Entertainment Weekly is suggesting the band make time for “American Idol” loser runner-up Adam Lambert. Since Queen’s lead singer, Paul Rodgers, recently peaced out the band, they need a replacement ASAP. And on the last episode of “Idol,” Kris Allen did a duet of Queen’s “Champions” with Lambert, and his flamboyancy totally reminded us of late Queen singer Freddie Mercury. EW says Adam “has the musical chops and stage presence vital to preserving Queen’s signature sound.” So, should Adam pick up the phone and call Queen, stat? Or should he concentrate on churning out his own tunes? [EW]

I don’t think I’ve seen America so wound up over the results of an election since November. In case you live under a rock, Kris Allen, the Jack Johnson-type from Arkansas, beat out glam-rocker Adam Lambert from San Diego for the title of “American Idol” last night. The star-studded season finale, which included performances by Cyndi Lauper, KISS, Queen, and a host of other music legends, ran over two hours. “It feels good,” Kris replied when Ryan asked how it felt to win, “but Adam deserves this.” If Twitter-verse is any indication, a lot of America agrees with him.

In a major upset, Kris Allen beat out guyliner-wearing Adam Lambert in the “American Idol” finale last night. During his performance with KISS, Adam’s fashion sense stole the show. His jacket featured weird cage-like shoulders that looked positively Lady Gaga-esque. [Los Angeles, 5/20/09]

Last night was the battle of the roommates on “American Idol.” Xenu-enthusiasts Katie Holmes and Suri Cruise watched as the always dramatic Adam Lambert and the quietly confident Kris Allen duked it out vocally. In round one, each one chose his favorite song of the competition. Adam brought back “Mad World,” and Kris made us swoon with “Ain’t No Sunshine When She’s Gone.” Next, producer Simon Fuller picked the songs—Adam got Sam Cooke’s “A Change Is Gonna Come,” while Kris funked out Marvin Gaye’s “What’s Going On.” Finally, we suffered through the contestants’ renditions of “No Boundaries,” co-written by judge Kara DioGuardi. Equally awe inspiring, in a bad way, was Paula in a day-glow green getup and Simon in a shirt unbuttoned to his bellybutton.

I know neither of these guys really wants to win because they both read my post last week about how guys who take home the “American Idol” title are eternally cursed. But since I can’t make up my mind about who I want to win, here’s a side-by-side look at these vocal monsters.