Tag Archives: abuse

British Actor Helpfully Explains Why “It’s Not Difficult For A Woman To Make A Man Hit Her”

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On Abused Women
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“It’s not difficult for a woman to make a man hit her. … The problem with strong, intelligent women is that they can argue well. And if there is a time where you can’t get a word in … and I … I lashed out. I couldn’t end the argument. Something must have brought it on. When frustration builds up and you can’t think of a way out… It happened and I’m very, very ashamed of it. … She certainly wasn’t a beaten wife, she was hit and that’s different.”

I don’t know who the British actor Dennis Waterman is, but his why-I-punched-my-wife logic makes him sounds like he’s the Mel Gibson of the UK. The actor was on Piers Morgan’s talk shows discussing his rough 1998 divorce from actress Rula Lenska, who claimed he had a drinking problem and that he beat her. Dennis doesn’t dispute he had a hand in the drinking, but the hitting? Well, that’s just not his fault. (Of course not.)

Dennis has been condemned by the British anti-violence group Refuge, which issued a no-duh statement “No one can make their partner hit them.”  [The F Word via Mirror UK]

I Was In An Emotionally Abusive Relationship

Why is that women stay with their abusers? A little less than two years ago, I certainly couldn’t have told you the answer to that question. Now I can. And that’s because I did.

I’ll never be able to pinpoint the exact moment when my relationship with Chris started to become unhealthy. It could have been as early as the moment I met him. It could have been the first time he criticized my weight. It could have been when he started controlling who I could hang out with. It could have even been the very first time he called me a “stupid slut.” Really, at this point it all becomes a big blur full of screaming, name calling, and suicidal threats, not to mention one very unhealthy pattern of fighting and making up.  Read more

Shocking Spanking Video Drives Home Horror Of Hitting Your Teen

November 3, 2011

Should There Be A Domestic Abuser Registry?

domestic violence photo

If a new bill introduced in New York goes through, people convicted of domestic violence or stalking would be required to register with a Domestic Violence Offender Database. Anyone convicted of a felony domestic violence offense against a family or household member would be required to join the registry, which would identify the school at which he or she is enrolled, the place of employment he or she works, and offender’s home address. The registry would be set up similar to, and accessible to the public like, the sex offender registry already in place.

The bill was prompted by the murder last week of 23-year-old Sarah Coit, who was allegedly stabbed and then beheaded by her boyfriend Raul Barrera on Manhattan’s Lower East Side. Raul Barrera had several DV incidents on his record. Keep reading »

Oprah Talks About Getting Pregnant At 14, Drinking Detergent As A Cry For Help

“Me getting pregnant was a result of bad choices, not having boundaries, sexual abuse from the time I was 9, 10, 11, 12, 13. … My mother said, ‘You can’t stay here,’ so I had to move with my father in Nashville. I hid the whole thing. … My father as part of his decree about what’s gonna go on in his house and what isn’t gonna go on in the house said … ‘I would rather see a daughter of mine floating down the Cumberland River than to bring shame on this family with the indecency of an illegitimate child.’ He said this and I know that I am pregnant. So I’m thinking, ‘Well, I’m just going to have to kill myself.’ … I did stupid things like, you know, drinking detergent and all that crazy stuff that you do when you’re trying to get attention, when you’re really just trying to cry for help.”

Oprah talks to Piers Morgan about getting pregnant at age 14, and feeling “no connection to [the baby] whatsoever.” Shortly after the detergent drinking incident, Oprah lost the baby. She says that she took it as her second chance. Watch more of the powerful interview here. [via NY Daily News] Keep reading »

Why Am I Such A Jerk To My Husband?

While discussing my New Year’s resolutions, I flippantly threw out that I was going to try to be less of a sarcastic jerk when talking to my husband — you know, for the sake of my kids.

Yes, it’s true. I have caught my boys — even the 4-year-old — using some of my own special brand of sarcastic quips or passive-aggressive phrasings, and it has made me wince. Deeply. Read more Keep reading »

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