I see London, I see France, I’m gonna see what’s in Levi Johnston‘s underpants. He’s going to be taking it all off for Playgirl! Levi’s lawyer said yesterday it’s a “foregone conclusion” that he’ll pose for the mag and that the images will be online by the end of the year. He also revealed that Levi’s hired a personal trainer and is working out three hours a day, six days a week to get ready for the photo shoot. Though judging from photos we’ve already seen, maybe he doesn’t need that much work? [People]

Do you remember Tricia Walsh Smith, aka the “YouTube Wife”? Last year, she made a video rant (relive the glory, after the jump) about her husband that went viral, probably because she talked about their sexless marriage and called him out on his porn stashes. Tricia’s husband is the wealthy New York president of the Shubert Organization, Philip Smith, who hid a clause in her pre-nuptial agreement that stated he could give her a “notice of termination” and throw her out whenever he’d like. And that he did. Her video didn’t get Tricia any money in the divorce proceedings, but it caused the divorce judge to accuse her of orchestrating a “calculated and callous” campaign of harassment against her ex. Oops.

Well, Tricia is back, and now she’s made a frickin’ music video. The song sounds a bit like old Pet Shop Boys, and I’m psyched for the inevitable remixes. This is a preview of the musical she’s working on called “Incredibly Brilliant Play.” Someone get this woman an agent!

Police have finally arrested the man who allegedly filmed nude videos of ESPN sportscaster Erin Andrews through a peephole in a hotel room. He’s an insurance agent named Michael David Barrett, 47, from Westmont, Ill., who appears to have no direct connection to Andrews. Police have charged him with interstate stalking after allegedly taping videos of Andrews walking around hotel rooms naked, trying to sell the videos to TMZ, and then posting them online. Classy guy!

Let the games begin! After the revelation on Friday that David Letterman was shtupping his intern/assistant Stephanie Birkitt, a second woman has come forward saying that she had a year-long affair with Dave. Holly Hester was an intern at the “Late Show” in the early ‘90s and says that everything started when Dave asked her to the movies. “I was madly in love with him at the time,” she told TMZ.com. “I would have married him. He was hilarious.” I wonder how many more women will step up, here? What is it about interns? Just that they’re young and less likely to make a stink with human resources?

Last night, David Letterman nipped an extortion plot in the bud and told his audience that some mysterious person was demanding $2 million to keep quiet evidence that he’d slept with women on his staff. What is it about David Letterman that attracts the crazies? First there was that plot to kidnap his son, then Joaquin Phoenix, and now this? Finally, we’re getting the details on who did the extorting. The main suspect is apparently Robert “Joe” Halderman, a “48 Hours” producer who’s been nominated for an Emmy. He was arrested and his job has been suspended. [Huffington Post]

But how did he know that Letterman had dallied with women on his staff? Because ... one of the women is his ex-girlfriend, Stephanie Birkitt. Birkitt interned at the “Late Show” in 1996 and later became Dave’s assistant. She appeared on the show multiple times, covering the Winter Olympics, interviewing “Survivor” cast-offs, and playing the character Vicki. Apparently, she and Letterman started doing the horizontal polka, though their affair supposedly ended before Letterman had a baby with his long-term girlfriend in 2003. Halderman either found out or was shown Birkitt’s diary entries, letters, and photos of Birkitt’s that proved she was banging Letterman.

We were pretty shocked when Mackenzie Phillips published a book revealing that she had a decade-long sexual relationship with her father, John Phillips of The Mamas and The Papas. But we were even more surprised when she defended it, saying she was raped initially but, later on, the acts were “consensual.” This whole thing sparked a huge debate about Genetic Sexual Attraction, or GSA. Genetic Sexual Attraction is an emotional and physical attraction between family members. The feelings often start after the two have been separated for a long time and, upon reuniting, find there is something, er, more between them. Most think it’s totes wrong but there is a vocal minority that says GSA is just misunderstood. I’ll present both sides, then you can tell us what you think!

What’s the best way to get press coverage before an election? A scandal, of course! Take, for example, East Cleveland Mayor Eric Brewer, who has been blowing up since photos of him in drag surfaced on the web. What a coincidence that it’s just days before his primary election! While Brewer won’t confirm that the photos are actually of him (umm ... they look exactly like him), he kind of gives himself away saying, “You need a sex scandal to get to the next level.” Maybe he’ll be running on the ticket as Erica Brewer? [BuzzFeed]

John Edwards, step aside with your little scandal. After the jump, some more shady mayors.

After years of watching political wives stand by their man when their men had not only not stood by them but lay down with other women, Jenny Sanford was a breath of fresh air. After hearing about her husband’s dalliances with an Argentine mistress (and his adoration of her tan lines), Jenny tried to forgive her husband. “But we reached a point where I felt it was important to look my sons in the eyes and maintain my dignity, self-respect, and my basic sense of right and wrong,” she said in a statement. “I therefore asked my husband to leave two weeks ago.” It’s a decision she’s stuck by. Now Jenny will be writing a memoir about her experience, to be published next May by Ballantine Books. Of the book, Jenny says, “I would like to show others how important it is to stand firm on one’s principles, stay true to oneself, and respond with grace and honesty to whatever hurdles may come.” The best part of this news? That Mark Sanford had a book in the works which his publisher nixed when the affair scandal broke. Oops. [Galleycat]

A dishy new book proposal by a former aide says former Senator John Edwards wasn’t merely cheating on his long-suffering wife Elizabeth Edwards. According to Andrew Young, the senator promised Rielle Hunter he’d marry her after Elizabeth died from cancer in a rooftop ceremony in NYC with the Dave Matthews Band playing.

Urgent memo to Senator Edwards: Making romantic plans for after your wife’s death = tacky! [New York Times]

When ESPN reporter Erin Andrews learned in July some perverted peeping Tom had videotaped her naked through a peephole in her hotel room, she did what any of us would do: she called her parents screaming. Andrews told Oprah Winfrey about her ordeal on this afternoon’s show:

“Having to call my parents and they—they thought I was physically injured how bad I was screaming…I kept screaming [to my father], ‘I’m done. My career is over. I’m done. Get it off. Get it off the Internet. Get it off.’”

By now, you all know the story of Jaycee Lee Dugard—kidnapped for 18 years, completely isolated in a series of structures in her captors’ backyard, raped repeatedly. OC Register columnist Mark Whicker took a rather unique approach to covering Jaycee’s story. Rather than focus on the horrible abuse, Whicker chose to talk about ... all the sports Jaycee missed in those 18 years. He expressed deep sadness that while in captivity, the girl couldn’t “spike a volleyball ... or pitch a softball ... or smack a forehand down the line.” Whicker then opined, “Now, that’s deprivation.” He goes on to provide Dugard with a list of all the sports happenings she missed while she was, oh, having her rapist’s children.

John Belushi, Horatio Sanz, Chris Farley ... the funny fat guy has always been a successful stock character on “Saturday Night Live.” But is there a chick over a size six in the cast? Well, there used to be. More than a handful of hotness, Casey Wilson, was just fired after two seasons.

Some critics argue it was because she failed to create a memorable, one-of-a-kind persona, but then how do you explain Tim Meadows being given almost a decade to come up with “The Ladies Man”? There’s a bigger answer here and E! News went all Nancy Drew to find out why Casey got the pink slip. What they uncovered is pretty hard to swallow.

This is the part where becoming an overnight sensation gets not-so-pretty. Yesterday afternoon, 17-year-old U.S. Open phenom Melanie Oudin went down in her match against number 9-seeded Caroline Wozniacki. And to add insult to injury, this morning reporters are poking into the details of her personal life. Last summer, Melanie’s dad, John, filed for divorce from her mom, Leslie. Sports Illustrated tracked down the divorce papers and found that the grounds given were adultery. John claimed that Melanie Leslie was having an affair with Brian de Villiers, aka Melanie’s coach.

Caster Semenya, the runner who was forced to undergo sex-determination testing, appears on the cover of South African magazine You, with her hair down and her makeup done (including dark burgundy nail polish) and wearing a wardrobe that includes a silver sequined top with black leggings and a black dress accessorized with a necklace and piles of gold bangles.

Semenya does look more feminine in the You photos than she did in the other photos we’ve seen of her in her running attire, but why the heck does someone have to be styled in girly clothes to be accepted as a woman? The results of the sex-determination test aren’t in yet, but perhaps Semenya and her PR team are hoping they can convince the world she’s not a man by wearing a dress and lipstick. We, however, know plenty of guys who wear women’s clothes better than we do. [You via Broadsheet]

“Was Holly Golightly Really a Prostitute?” The New Yorker wonders. A British stage production of Truman Capote’s Breakfast at Tiffany’s prompted the Telegraph to ask the same question. After the jump, what The New Yorker uncovered.

And we thought Heidi Montag’s performance and all the plastic surgery at the Miss Universe pageant was scandalous? Check out this video of Miss Australia blowing up a condom to the point where it burst. The backstory: a few days before the pageant, the Miss Universe Organization held a “Condom Olympics” in conjunction with Population Services International (PSI), a global health organization which sponsors the YouthAIDS program. At said Olympics, the Miss Universe contestants participated in a slew of condom-use and HIV-awareness games, including one where condoms filled with water were used as shot-put balls. The winner of the contest received a spot as a YouthAIDs ambassador. Of course, not everyone was so excited about this event and many religious groups are up in arms about it. What do you think—good way for the Miss Universe contestants to use their fame in their respective countries, or completely out of line? [CNS News]

After months off the job following the whole some-creep-filming-her-nude-in-her-hotel-and-posting-the-voyeuristic-vid-on-the-internet thing, Erin Andrews returned to ESPN last night as a sideline commentator at the South Carolina vs. North Carolina State game. (Goooo Gamecocks!) Some critics are saying that her return was uneventful and boring, but, uh, what did they want her to do? Tap dance while saying, “I’m baaack! And this time with clothes on!” I gotta say that I think Andrews handled the situation like a champ. When the video exploded online, she stepped out of the public eye. Thankfully, ESPN stood behind her and threatened legal action against anyone who posted the video. Since then, she’s stayed mums on the topic. She did a photo shoot for the September issue of GQ, but while the magazine often has women take it all off for their images, Erin kept it classy posing with a group of football players. In one of the images, above, she’s suited-up, covered in mud, and sitting on a locker room bench. I think it’s a great commentary on who she is—one of the guys and, yet, not. Next Friday, Erin’s one and only interview on the subject of the video will air—and it’s with Oprah.

In late 1980, hours before he was shot and killed, John Lennon posed with wife Yoko Ono for legendary photographer Annie Leibovitz. Lennon was naked and curled around his wife. After the Beatles star died, the image became an iconic Rolling Stone cover. Now, nearly 30 years later, their son, Sean Lennon, and his model-girlfriend Kemp Muhl recreated the infamous shot with provocative photographer Terry Richardson for the fall issue of Purple magazine. This time, Sean lies fully clothed as a nude Muhl spoons him. What do you think: beautiful homage or twisted facsimile? [Flavorwire]

Sometimes it’s hard to remember that folks back in olden times (a) had a sense of humor and (b) had dirty minds just as bad as ours. But it’s true. An art restorer at the Louvre was tasked with restoring Nicolas Poussin’s 17th century painting “Hymenaios Disguised as a Woman During an Offering to Priapus,” which shows the god of marriage (Hymenaois) giving a gift to the god of fertility (Priapus). Underneath many layers of paint, she found that ... Priapus has an erect penis that’s, well, basically porn-star sized. The restoration team thinks that the peen was probably in the original work and that, years later, another artist covered it up after getting complaints from the Catholic Church. An alternate theory is that, back in the day, artists would paint their subjects nude and then paint clothes on top so as to make them as realistic as possible. Who knows which theory is right, but if you happen to be in Brazil next week, go check out the unveiling of the restored painting at the Museu de Arte de São Paulo. [The Art Newspaper]