“Can you really not get preggers if you have sex on the last days of your period?”—Hating Condoms, Cleveland, OH

How many times have you heard an “Oops” story? Every Christmas there’s always that relative that drinks too much eggnog and says something like, “You know, Larry was a mistake. We were done having kids. We wanted to go to Bermuda.” I’m sure if Larry was a lawyer and not still living with his mother, she wouldn’t say that. But you get my drift.

Gaining weight often makes women better dancers because they have something to shake, if you know what we mean. Case in point: Belly dancers—and a London ballet company couldn’t agree more. Balletlorent is looking for 12 pregnant women to join the cast of their next production “MaEternal.”  The Artistic Director, Liv Lorent, who is pregnant herself, says, “You can’t get a 25-year-old size 8 ballet dancer type body to move with the weight, the gravitas or the sheer cheerful spirit a pregnant woman.”  So although no dance experience is necessary, you better bring it to the audition because there might be a lot of celeb competition with everyone, from Jessica Alba to Minnie Driver, being knocked up. [Reuters]

When you’re Elvis’ daughter, fried peanut butter and banana sandwiches are in your genes, but such a tasty lineage means that you’re, unfortunately, going to be made fun for the way you look in your jeans. Lisa Marie Presley has been blasted in the press for her recent weight gain, with headlines like “Lisa Marie Presley Has Become A Fat Slob Just Like Her Dad” splattered across the tabloids. But it turns out she’s pregnant, not fat!  Sources close to the R&B royalty say although she’s not one to blab about such things, she’s going to have her third child with her fourth husband, rocker Michael Lockwood. Chew on that, paparazzi!

Birth nowadays is usually a sweaty, messy, drug-addled experience. But now a group of doctors and midwives promise that if you go au natural, the baby will come the same way you did at its conception—with an oh-so-pleasurable orgasmic birth! World renowned midwife Ina May Gaskin says, “It is possible to have an ecstatic birth—in fact, that is the best natural high that I know of.” Experts believe that in an unassisted, drug-free birth scenario, the woman can be left to experience the contractions often misidentified as pain and, with the help of, um, stimulation, even enjoy them. If you’re eager to find out more, the docs are hard at work finishing a documentary to promote this new handy technique. While the experts claim the process will save you money on medical expenses, you may have to spend a lot more on doctors when your kid finds their homemade child birth porno video. [Nerve]

After nine years at Brooklyn’s New York Methodist Hospital, OBGYN Josine Veca has seen it all. Here she gives The Frisky her diagnosis of what women want when they stop by.

What are common concerns for women when they come to see you?
It varies by age group. Younger patients, 30 and below, are usually concerned with STDs, birth control, or, if not, trying to prevent pregnancy. As the women get older and are approaching menopause, they’re worried about hot flashes, irregular periods, and symptoms that may be unusual. I’d estimate that 30 to 40 percent are concerned with a mixture of those issues.

How much prying do you have to do or do most women come in with their own specific questions?
A lot of women who come in with their own questions are very comfortable talking about sex. But if they don’t, the subject usually comes up when I’m interviewing them. At first they may be tentative, but the idea is to open communication

Seriously, it does seem like getting pregnant in Hollywood is just about as easy as this Funny Or Die clip suggests. [Funny Or Die]

TV shows or movies about baby-birthing are a bit like a car wreck to us—watching them makes us ache in all sorts of places we didn’t know existed, yet we still cannot turn away out of a morbid fascination. Add Ricki Lake to a movie about baby-birthing and you’ve got what amounts to a 10-car pile-up in the middle of a busy Los Angeles freeway. Lake, who famously starred as fat and awesome Tracy Turnblad in John Waters’ Hairspray and as the host of her eponymous talk show in the ‘90s, has two kids and both of the births were done at home. She filmed the birth of her second son Owen and then decided to turn portions of the material into the new documentary “The Business of Being Born” which she executive produced. The documentary tackles the way in which hospitals typically handle the birth ritual (read: as a traumatic emergency situation), offering midwife-assisted home births as a positive and completely safe alternative. More juicy details, after the jump.

Dude, we realize she’s been airbrushed, but a super preggo Christina Aguilera on the cover of Marie Claire looks super gorgeous. Why is it that pregnant ladies can get all nudie and it’s considered beautiful and elegant and sweet, but non-knocked up women getting nekkid for the camera is considered porn? Is it because being in the pregnant state is considered clean and innocent? We’re not saying we disagree, but it’s just odd because, clearly, if you’re with child, you’re no virgin, unless your name is Mary and you hail from Nazareth. [Marie Claire]

J. Lo and Marc Anthony finally announced what the entire universe already knew—that she’s knocked up after years of off-and-on tabloid speculation about fertility problems. The latest rumor is she’s having twins! Do you think each will inherit her talents for singing (um…) and acting (um…)? No matter what, it’s a sure bet that the kid(s) will be the cutest on da block. [MSNBC]