Have you heard the news? The Obamas got a dog, and they’re naming him Bo! There were some conflicting reports about Bo over the weekend (is he, in fact, from a shelter?), so we thought thought we’d straighten out things regarding the new First Dog.

Pet custody battles are becoming more and more common. When married pet owners divorce, the animal they shared often finds itself at the center of their split. Monthly support payments, visitation rights, restraining orders, custody battles, and legal fees: Sounds like the usual bitter divorce battle, right? Not so fast. This time Kramer v. Kramer also stars Missy the Chihuahua, Sable the Keeshond, and Barney, a golden retriever-Lab mix. Welcome to the brave new world of animal custody law.

Judging by box office returns, hundreds of thousands of people went to see “Marley & Me,” the movie about that goofy yellow Lab. My ex-boyfriend was most certainly not one of them.

I met “Greg” online. Actually, a friend of mine hand-selected him for me, apparently because when left to my own devices I choose poorly. In any event, Greg and I met for dinner, and I thought I’d struck gold. He was quick-witted, employed, and even mocked his own bald spot. So, at the end of dessert, when he went on a rant about how dogs smell and are “pathetic substitutes for children,” I refrained from punching him in the face and instead agreed to a second date. Besides, I thought, he might say he’s not a dog person, but once he meets my amazing dog Perry, all bets would be off. I mean, have you seen Perry?

Our pets can be rather intuitive, but we doubt they know when it’s the holiday season. All they know is that you’re excited about something and, therefore, they feed off your energy. So this is still the perfect time to get your cat or dog something special or something they need. Your pet is your best friend through and through, after all.

I don’t believe in pre-nups, but if I was going to have one, it would have to say something about the dog. Lucca is comin’ with me should I ever get divorced. More and more couples are going to court over custody of their pets, battling for full custody, joint custody, or at the very least, visitation rights. But poor kitties! Apparently 90% of pet custody cases involve dogs. Puss ‘N’ Boots gets no love… [USA Today]

It’s National Pet Week! In honor of all things cute and mushy and wrinkly and wet-nosed, we’d like you to send us pictures of your pets (email pictures to tips@thefrisky.com). At the end of the week we’ll post the ten most squeal-inducing so your friends, neighbors, and the strangers on this here interweb can “ooh” and “ahh” over your pets’ adorableness. Since it would be totally unfair for me to include my dog Lucca among the top ten, I will just post this video of her when she was a puppy to inspire you.

The Frisky was on the way to lunch when we noticed that on the rooftop of the doggie daycare next door, a photo shoot was taking place! A wedding photo shoot! With puppies! Our reaction was a mix of excitement (me!), revulsion (Emily), and “huh?” (Catherine). What do you guys think of household pets having weddings?

My dog, Lucca, had to go to the vet today which has got me thinking about what I would do if she didn’t come home—pets are like family and the only thing I love more than her is my fiancé. My mom and brother are third and fourth (sorry, guys!). So aside from contemplating taking a long walk off a short pier, I think I might follow Kimora Lee Simmons lead. Her beloved dog Zoe just died and she’s thinking about having the 18-year old pup’s remains turned into a diamond. Say what? “There is a company that makes diamonds out of your loved ones,” the fabulous Kimora told People. “They make diamonds from a little of the carbon from the ash, so I might do that.” It seems like a better way of keeping your dog with you at all times—after all, my childhood cat, Ribbon, is sitting in a tin in a storage facility somewhere in Southern California. [StarPulse]

Q: My dog constantly barks when I’m having sex. It’s so annoying and a bit of a turn-off and I don’t know what to do. If I put him in another room he barks even louder. My guy recommended we keep the puppy on the bed with us during the act but that kind of creeps me out.  Is it weird that my guy is cool with that?—Sick Of The Yelping, New York, NY

A: Blugh. I just shuddered at my desk. Puppies and sex? I can think of a ton of things that go better together. Vanilla and chocolate, peas and carrots, margaritas and tacos. Life is too short to mix gross things like puppies and sex. Now that you know I’m a prude who doesn’t think Lassie and fellatio go together, I feel confident telling you it’s a little weird your boyfriend wants to keep him on the bed. With that being said, I can also see how guys can be clueless. I’m gonna go out on a limb and say it’s more of the “duh” factor with your man, as opposed to the “Holy crap, I’m dating a freak!” factor.

You should talk to your boyfriend and tell him that it bothers you. Sit him down and compare the dog to your fictional child for a bit. Tell him the dog is part of the family and that allowing him to watch is the equivalent of a kid seeing his parents doing it—though definitely use the “f” word, because that will get the point across. Then you should immediately look into a trainer or get some books on how to stop your dog from barking. I’m no pet expert, but I think training the dog to not bark while you’re doing the deed is a better solution than letting him watch the action. Now, if the dog still wants to watch, go ahead and make the bitch pay for it. That kind of entertainment doesn’t come for free.