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The Real Reason Men Have Always Hated Vampires

iStockphoto

People magazine will release a “New Moon” special to the ravenous, adoring masses tomorrow. The tween girl set will dutifully purchase it, their mothers will surreptitiously steal it, and every dude will hate it. We’ve told you why chicks dig vampires and men don’t, while Esquire says it’s because the vamps are batting for the other team, but this doesn’t begin to cover it. Men, well, straight men have hated vampires since Bram Stoker—they’re hardwired for it.

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“New Moon” Trailer Eclipses Our Expectations

Some people tuned in to the MTV Video Music Awards for the Michael Jackson tribute, to see Janet Jackson belt out “Scream.” Others tuned in for Beyoncé‘s “Single Ladies” dance number or to see Lady Gaga‘s insane wardrobe choices. But let’s face it: a high proportion of last night’s viewership tuned in to see MTV’s exclusive trailer for “New Moon,” which premiered halfway through the show. I’ve never been a “Twilight”-head, but now even I am seriously looking forward to November 20th.

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A Bite Of The “New Moon” Soundtrack From Death Cab For Cutie

New Moon Sountrack

What could make Seth Cohen and every teenage girl in America squeal at equally loud decibel levels? The fact that a one-minute-and-45-second snippet of the first single from the “New Moon” soundtrack, Death Cab For Cutie’s “Meet Me On The Equinox,” is now available online. The movie doesn’t open until November 20, but if you pre-order the soundtrack now, you can be one of the first to download the whole song during the MTV Video Music Awards this weekend. Judging from the snippet, the song has the perfect wistful vampy vibe. We’re sure the rest of the soundtrack will be dope as well since it’s curated by music director Alexandra Patsavas, the lady who made “The O.C.” and “Twilight” soundtracks so addictive. Rumor has it that Thom Yorke and Kings of Leon will also have ditties on the album. [MTV]

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New Doc Explores Forks, Washington, The Real Home Of “Twilight”

There are T-minus six months until “New Moon” hits movie theaters, and “Twilight” heads are seriously chomping at the bit. To bide their time, many are heading to the real town of Forks, Washington, where the books and movie supposedly take place. But since that’ll cost you a plane ticket plus $300 for the official tour, we’re excited about this documentary “Twilight in Forks,” which tells the story of this town which famously is the rainiest spot in the United States. The doc takes you inside the real Forks High School, talks to a clerk at a local store who constantly gets mistaken for Bella, heads to La Push beach, and interviews a Quileutes elder about the tribes’ legends. Overall, it’s a look at how this sleepy town has changed since “Twilight” blew up. The doc comes out on DVD on October 15, but go ahead and put it in your Netflix queue. [MTV]

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“New Moon”‘s Voluri Revealed!

New Moon's New Photos Of Volturi Vampires

Don’t pee yourself, Twilight fans. Check out these just-released posters of Volturi vampires “Jane” (Dakota Fanning looking RAD), “Caius” (Jamie Campbell Bower), and “Alec” (Cameron Bright). This is not saying much, because “Twilight” (the movie) was cheesy as hell (not that I didn’t see it twice), but “New Moon” looks like it might just rule.

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Happy Hump Day: Twilight Hottie Gets Half-Naked

Alex Meraz, one of the snarling “Twilight: New Moon” studs, is about to rip off that white T-shirt. Unlike the 18 T-Shirts That Won’t Get You Laid, taking a shirt off works almost every time. [Towleroad]

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Holla! Another New Moon Teaser Trailer

It doesn’t take much to get “Twilight” fans in a tizzy. This new 14-second teaser trailer for “New Moon” is certainly doing the trick. What does the trailer show us? To, uh, not have high expectations for the acting and dialogue in this flick. OK, fine. We won’t judge it on this tiny snippet. But I think we can all agree that the highlight here is Taylor Lautner‘s bod. He’s over 18, right?

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“Twilight” Threads For Sale At Nordstrom, Of All Places

Nordstrom will sell clothes to promote

How convenient for rich tweeners who need both a $300 pair of shoes and “Twilight” t-shirt: Nordstrom will be hawking “New Moon” clothes come October 15. R-Patz obsessives can snatch up both a $32 “Team Edward” tee and a $30 necklace that features the family crest of the fictional Edwards clan. (There are tank tops and plaid jackets, too.) The price range is cheaper than we’d suspect from Nordstrom, but it’s also merch we’d expect to find at Hot Topic instead. Guess Nordstrom must really need the clams? [NY Daily News]

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Quick Pic: Business In The Front, Party In The Back

Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson at Comic-Con

Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart couldn’t hide their nerd love at a ComicCon conference for “New Moon.” Girl, if he still wants to bone you, despite the mullet, you know it’s L-O-V-E. [San Diego, 7/24/09]

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Inevitable: A Weekly TV Show About “Twilight” Debuts In August

Weekly TV Show About

“Twilight” groupies who can’t stop—won’t stop—at prowling Forks, Washington, for Edward and Bella, rejoice! On August 10, a weekly show with the news and gossip about “New Moon,” the next flick in the “Twilight” saga, will debut on ReelzChannel. Executives say they “Twilight Weekly: Spotlight” will be the first-ever weekly TV show about an upcoming movie. Whether this staves off or revs up the next deluge of Robert Pattinson/Taylor Lautner obsession until it comes out in November remains to be seen. [NY Times]

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Vampires Are Yesterday’s News, Zombies Are The Hotties Of Tomorrow

What Supernatural Being Will Replace The Vampire?

The front page of the latest New York Times Style section is plastered with the faces of sexy vampires. Not that vampires are not the “it” sex symbols of the moment, but whenever the Times writes about something, that thing has inevitably jumped the shark. Not that I think the blood suckers from “Twilight” are going to be disappearing any time soon, but I think vampires have reached their zenith. I wish “True Blood” many more seasons of sex and sucking, but vampire culture is past its prime. The real question is, what is the next supernatural creature millions of girls will lust after? After a thorough and exhausting inventory of the non-human hotties out there, I bring you your next fantasy.

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Robert Pattinson Is A Worthy Cause, Say Petitioners

Robert Pattinson Petitions

Back in March we told you Robert Pattinson has a problem with body odor. We took a lot of flack from his fans for that little mention in “Quickies,” even though we were reporting the truth. Well, now the fans are complaining about the hottie’s B.O. too. Eighty-nine people have signed the “Please Wash Your Hair, Robert Pattinson” petition so far, and another set of fans have signed the “Petition to get Robert Pattinson to take a bath!!! Who’s with me?” But there have been more positive petitions regarding Rob Patz. More than 5,000 people want him to host “Saturday Night Live,” at least one person wants him to use his British accent in “New Moon,” and several hope he’ll make an appearance in Tampa, Kansas City, and Australia. There’s no word yet whether any of these petitions have been successful, but one thing’s for sure, Robert’s celebrity will grow every day as long as he stars in the “Twilight” saga. [E! Online]

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Lip Venom And Other “New Moon” Product Tie-Ins We Hope They Make

New Moon movie poster

The second movie in the Twilight Saga, “New Moon,” will be released Nov. 20, and it’s supposed to be bigger and better than “Twilight.” Since the first movie was such a huge success, companies are already coming up with product tie-ins related to Edward, Bella, and friends. DuWop, the makeup brand behind Lip Venom, will supposedly release a special Twilight branded line of makeup. But we think there are plenty of other products that could fly off shelves with the “Twilight” logo on their packages.

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Quick Pic: Robert Pattinson Shows Off His Pearly White ... Abs?

Robert Pattinson Shirtless, Filming New Moon With Kristen Stewart

Filming a climactic scene for “New Moon” in Italy with co-star Kristen Stewart. [Montepulciano, Italy, 5/27/09]

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Star Couplings: Taylor Lautner Could Have A Real, Non-Vampire Girlfriend

Taylor Lautner Could Be Dating Selena Gomez
  • Taylor Lautner may be dating 16-year-old Disney star Selena Gomez. The two were spotted at a Vancouver diner. [E! Online]
  • What was Heidi’s wedding gift to Spencer? A song, of course. “Sex Ed”! [Perez Hilton]—Now, if I were Spencer, and thank the universe I’m not, I’d be offended. It sounds like she’s giving him pointers for their honeymoon.
  • Rumor has it that Maggie Gyllenhaal and boyfriend Peter Sarsgaard are going to tie the knot in Italy next month. [Just Jared]

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    Quickies!: Twilight Lawsuit Rumors Are Likely False

    Twilight Lawsuit Rumors False
  • The rumors that Twilight author Stephenie Meyer is being sued by a former college roommate for plagiarism are untrue. There are at least five reasons that make these rumors suspect. [Twilight Lexicon]
  • Miss California may have given what Perez Hilton called the “worst answer in pageant history,” but what about Miss North Carolina Kristen Dalton, who walked away with the Miss USA tiara? [Pop Eater]
  • Keep the laughter going and check out the five dumbest pageant moments. [Dumb As a Blog]—I can watch Miss Teen South Carolina’s answer during the 2007 Miss Teen USA pageant over and over and over.

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    New Additions To The “New Moon” Cast

    New Moon Cast

    Canadian supermodel Noot Seear has been cast as Heidi, a “fisher” who lures humans to the Volturi, in “The Twilight Saga: New Moon.” Summit Entertainment announced recently that Native American/First Nation actors were cast as the Wolf Pack. Check out the rumored new additions.
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    Robert Pattinson Turns Down Chance To Make Music For “New Moon”

    Robert Pattinson Won't Be On New Moon Soundtrack

    “Twilight” star, Robert Pattinson, recorded some songs for the movie’s soundtrack. In fact, his crooning helped the album steadily move up the U.S. album charts. But this time around, he’s turned down the opportunity to contribute his sultry voice to the upcoming movie sequel soundtrack. Why? Pursuing music professionally was never the actor’s intention and he’d rather keep his music career as a backup plan. The Brit is a talented composer, pianist and guitarist, so music may not be a horrible option if he’s never able to score another role after Edward Cullen. But until his 15 minutes of movie fame are up, he’s stepping aside so rock band Paramore can write the title track to the movie’s soundtrack. [I’mNotObsessed.com]

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    “Twilight” Sequel News: Madonna Gets In On The Action

    Madonna In Twilight Sequel

    The “Twilight” sequel is such a hot project that everyone wants to dance on its set, including Madonna. Ryan Seacrest told “E! News” that Madonna will be involved in the “Twilight” sequel, “New Moon,” in some capacity. Seacrest said Madonna will most likely appear in the film and provide music for the soundtrack. If the “New Moon” soundtrack is anything like the “Twilight” soundtrack, which featured songs by Paramore and Linkin Park, Madonna’s style of music will stick out like a sore thumb. Also, I can’t think of any role in “New Moon” that is appropriate for Madge. She could play one of the Volterra vampires, but then again, they’re supposed to be young, and we all know Madonna has seen more youthful, softer days. Maybe she’ll be a tourist ravaged by the Volterras in Italy? We could possibly be entertained by that scene. Anyway, I think this is a feeble attempt for Madonna to become relevant to a generation that knows little, and couldn’t care less, about the Material Girl. [OhNoTheyDidnt.com]

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    90210 Threatens To Take Over Twilight Sequel

    AnnaLynne McCord

    AnnaLynne McCord, Naomi Clark on “90210,” may be cast in “New Moon,” the “Twilight” sequel. Filmmakers are considering her for Heidi, a “fisher” who brings humans to the Volturi vampires to consume. McCord’s “90210” co-star Kellan Lutz will reprise his Emmett Cullen role, as well. Too bad Heidi and Emmett don’t have any romantic scenes together. Maybe then we’d know definitively whether McCord and Lutz are dating. Dakota Fanning is in talks to play Jane, a member of the Volturi family. Unlike McCord, Fanning didn’t even have to audition. [E! Online]

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