I am not a huge fan of “keeping it real.” Real often sucks. Where does real usually leave me? For starters: pale, too broke to afford jewelry I really want, mousy mop-topped and sleep deprived. I am not suggesting we all become cookie-cutter Barbies and I am all for embracing what nature gave us, yet there are just a few guilty pleasures in life where the fake version is indeed better than the real deal.

Summer is fabulous, but while we love splashing around under the hot sun, the makeup on our faces does not. If you’re going to wear makeup to the beach, you better be sure it’s going to stay on. There’s nothing more unattractive, or uncomfortable, than dripping mascara, caked concealer, and sticky lip gloss smearing all over your face.To help you out, here’s a list of our top water-friendly makeup picks, all of which will keep you looking fresh and fabulous, even while riding the waves. Hang ten to that!

You can’t wear a white dress to a wedding. It’s just not a subtle enough method for stealing the show. Turn up at the ceremony wearing a floor-length cream silk number, and suddenly everyone’s muttering insults about how you’re the “Inappropriate One.” Instead, walk in looking a level of gorgeous that diverts attention without being completely trashy. Kate Bosworth’s Met Ball hair and makeup (and dress) absolutely slaughtered the competition, and we show you how to steal her look after the jump.

If your friend’s getting married at City Hall, she’s probably a no-nonsense girl. She wants to get the job done and she wants it done now. This doesn’t mean you can put in zero effort just ‘cause it’s not a big ceremony and the selection of groomsmen is tiny. We love Cynthia Nixon’s look for its sophisticated prettiness and tell you how to get it after the jump!

Sam Fine is a makeup pro whose career has spanned more than 10 years. He’s made up almost everyone, including Tyra Banks, Vanessa Williams, and Jennifer Hudson. So we were totes excited to learn he’s releasing “Fine: The Basics of Beauty,” a DVD version of his

Fine Beauty, which promises to help the everyday woman get dolled up and look naturally gorgeous. The makeup master lets us in on the secret to bronze-y skin, pouty lips, and perfectly-arched brows by making up three women with different skin tones and beauty needs. Sounds exciting right? Well, in an evil plot to keep us from becoming our own Sam Fine, his website says the DVD was released last month, but we can’t find it anywhere. Who is this twisted person that would dangle a gem like this in front of our faces, but not deliver? We will keep checking Amazon, because when it comes to looking fine, we won’t be deterred!

Throughout the ages women have gone to great pains to get showstopping and eye-dropping cleavage. The corset was rough, stuffed-toilet paper bras were prone to discovery and the push-up bra is just a bit too obvious. According to the peeps from My Beautiful Breasts, however, your cleavage woes are over. This kit ain’t just your average bra-filling and lifting, ladies. We are talking about painting on your boobies, or lack thereof.

We’ve scene this trick before: use makeup to create contours on our bust line the same way we use bronzer to fake sharper cheekbones or those weird airbrushing techniques that create faux six-pack abs. Except, this ain’t just a wish of bronzer we are talking about. Eye shadow and blush come off pretty easy, but the bust stain can stay on for up to five days!  And, maybe I am just bitter because I can’t draw a stick figure, but painting-on your boobies sounds pretty complicated and complex. Chances are I would mess it up and have some pretty busted looking buhbies for a week.

I think I’ll just stick to toilet paper, thank you very much. [$69, My Beautiful Breasts Kit, ItCosmetics.com]

If you show up at a daytime wedding caked in makeup with a prom-style updo, you’re going to look like a moron. There, we said it. Daytime weddings aren’t always casual, but they’re definitely more chill than nighttime weddings. Your hair and makeup should match the minimal-fuss attitude of the event. After the jump, we tell you how to get model Jacquetta Wheeler’s smartly laid-book look.

I feel so ladylike and put-together when I have a fresh manicure, but that same polish job makes me feel like a sloppy slacker when it chips a few days later. I’ve tried a couple of things to solve this problem. I was a dedicated daily re-applier of Nail Tek Xtra, but then I got a life. Now I’ve settled on boring light colors that make peeling polish less noticeable, along with Creative Nail Design’s Stickey Base Coat. I was really excited when I read about O.P.I.‘s Axxium Soak-Off Gels, a permanent nail lacquer that lasts and lasts. It’s basically the same powder used for acrylic nails applied thinner. When dried under a UV light, the powder forms a chip-proof bond with the nail. To maintain the color, wearers get “color fills,” similar to an acrylic tips fill-in, when their nails grow out. Permanent in this sense doesn’t mean you have to rock the same nail color forever, though. Regular nail polish can be applied on top of the Soak-Off Gels. And the gels are removed by soaking the nails in an acetone solution.

The outside world is more like a Hooters restaurant than you previously thought: a new study says that men are more likely to tip a waitress if she looks pretty wearing makeup.

Researchers studied the tips received by two waitresses from 186 male and 98 female customers. Only one third of the dudes left a tip if the waitress wore a bare, makeup-less face. (Cheap bastards!) But after a beautician applied makeup to the servers, the number of men who tipped flew up to 51 percent. Not to mention that the size of the tips rose 25 percent. Hmm, it brings new meaning to the term “makeup tips,” doesn’t it?

If you’re craving something couture but aren’t willing to empty your savings, try DiorShow mascara. The mascara comes in three seductive colors, is encased in a gorgeous tube, and costs a manageable 24 bucks. Its brush is thick and full, which means your lashes will be too. And best of all? It’s water-proof, which makes it perfect for summer splashin’. Whether you’re preparing for a night on the town or a day at the beach, if you’re looking for some bold, frisky lashes, this is the perfect purchase. Who knew “Dior” and “bargain” could go hand in hand? [$24, Sephora]

Drew attended a demonstrated against the California Supreme Court’s decision upholding Prop 8. Good for her. But what’s up with the blue under-eye shadow? [West Hollywood, CA, 5/26/09]

Neon has dominated nail polish for the last several summers. This year is no different. While we’re glad Essie is back with another bright collection this year, we’re on the lookout for new ways to infuse punchy colors. During Japan Fashion Week, G.V.G.V., which is sold in the U.S. at cool-depot Opening Ceremony, sent models in neon pink eyeliner and lipstick down the runway. Hot pink on nails looks cute, but on your face, well, it makes a statement. Would you wear such a bold color on your face?

At left, Michelle Obama. At right, Michelle Obama’s makeup artist, Ingrid Grimes-Miles. Don’t their faces look eerily similar? See, ladies? The shape of your eyebrows and your makeup can change your face. [NYMag.com]

There are a lot of guys who like nothing better than a girl who rolls out of bed, brushes her chompers, throws on a pair of jeans and a shirt and is ready for whatever life has to throw at her. I am not one of those guys. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate that sometimes you (or I) may want to throw on a non-Red Sox cap and beeline it to the quickie mart for all the essentials (Fruit Roll-Ups, TP, ketchup, Olde English, the basics).

Historically speaking, when the economy tanks, makeup sales rise. That’s why two million Mary Kay salesgirls are roping their friends into makeovers for extra cash. The cosmetics company is doing so well they bought ads during the Superbowl and the Oscars to recruit more personnel. Sound nuts? You bet your blush! Peep this ABC News investigation and keep reading for four fast facts on the Mary Kay craze.

Salma Hayek has beautifully smooth skin, and once she launches her anti-aging cosmetic line, we’ll have her beauty secrets. The line is inspired by Hayek’s grandmother Maria Luisa, who was a makeup artist and used to make her own cosmetics. According to Hayek, Maria Luisa’s skin remained wrinkle-free well into her nineties. “When she died at 96, of course her skin had sagged, but she didn’t have any wrinkles,” Hayek told InStyle. The makeup line will be a recreation of her grandmother’s lotions and potions, made from ingredients available only in Latin America. But we’re also sure it will contain some plum lipsticks and brown and aubergine shade eyeshadows, too, as those are Hayek’s favorites. [Female First]

Blue nails aren’t really new—everyone from Lindsay Lohan to Camilla Belle has painted their nails some variation of the color in the last year—but it seems like new shades of blue are coming out by the dozen. A bunch of nail polish companies are releasing blue polishes for spring, and China Glaze even has an entire six-color line called Bahama Blues. Do you think the color is just a passing fad, or is it picking up enough steam to overtake purple in the nail polish color wars?


1. Essie Nail Polish in Mesmerize
2. OPI Nail Lacquer in Yoga-to Get This Blue!
3. CoverGirl Queen Collection 3-in-1 Step Nail Color and Sparkling Nail Topcoat in Rhythmic Blue
4. China Glaze in Bahamian Escape
5. Orly Nail Polish in Blue Collar

You can finally rub sexy Shane all over your lips—well, her and all your other favorite lipstick lesbians on “The L Word.”  Thanks to a team up with Three Custom Color Specialists, four fabulous shades have been created in homage to the Showtime hotties. Winey Kit, Red Hot Bette, Blushing Alice, and Naturally Naughty Shane are colors as fun and sheer as the clothes they wear on the hit drama.  At $20 a pop, you can definitely take them home with you.  [World of Wonder]

There was a period of time when our handbag contained 15 different kinds of lip gloss, balm, and other assorted goo that we used depending on the occasion. There was one that made our pout look more kissable, one for when our lips were really chapped, and another when we wanted to resemble Dita Von Teese, only with clothes on. Now, we’re a one-balm kind of girl, and Weleda Everon is our soul mate. [$5, Weleda.com]

We’re giving away five Weleda Everon Lip Blams, but you have to work if you want your lips to be properly moisturized. The five best commenters for this coming week—from today, Friday, Feb. 27 through Thursday, March 5—will be awarded with one. So, be as clever, smart, and original as you can! Click HERE to read the official rules.