With less than a month to go till 2009, we know many people are thinking about the past year and what they’d like to do differently within the next 365 days. The thing about resolutions is that we constantly set ourselves up for disappointment. Either the goal is too big and we’re upset that we don’t get there quickly enough, or we don’t surround ourselves with enough encouragement and support to follow through. Making a resolution is largely about making change easier. We don’t often want to do the things we’ve put our minds to because they don’t happen easily. But you can make your resolution work for you if you go one step at a time and learn to frame your goals positively (“I will do this”) instead of negatively (“I won’t do that”).

1. Pack Your Lunch: Instead of spending $10 on a sandwich that you don’t really enjoy, bring your lunch from home—you’ll save money (which can then be spent, guilt-free, on martinis at the end of the week), you’ll hopefully eat healthier, and you can use up leftovers instead of letting them rot away in your fridge.

2. Call Your Mom For No Reason: It’s easy to go days and weeks without phoning home because of how busy we all are with work and the holidays, but make it your mission to call your mom for no other reason than just to say, “Hi, what’s new?” It will literally fill her heart with joy.

3. Volunteer: Hit up a soup kitchen, read to the elderly at a nursing home, or even just donate your old winter coat to a clothing drive…there are so many easy ways to make a big impact on someone’s life. And, of course, selfishly speaking, doing good for others will make you feel good too.

Though the stigma is lessening, men are still far more likely than women to let their depression go untreated. Blame it on Rambo, Brando, or the lure of the martini, but many guys still aren’t getting the help they need. As the traditionally stressful, dark days of winter set in, here are some signs that the guy you love might be suffering from more than a loss in fantasy football ...

It’s hard not to get smitten with someone at an open bar, especially if you’re single in December. The tricky thing is that a lot of the holiday parties are for business, so pleasure would have to be a secret bonus. However, the seasonal soirées bring about the best time to finally go for that cutie in accounting that you’ve had your eye on. After a year’s worth of fantasizing over the copy machine, a hot romp with an officemate can be spicier than eggnog. While it might not be the most professional move, it can be just what you need to get you in the giving spirit. So, here’s how you turn the heat up on your love life during the cold weather holiday gatherings…

Ever since John Edwards explained away his affair with Rielle Hunter, saying, “I started to believe that I was special and became increasing egocentric”, we’ve been thinking about how it is just SUCH a dealbreaker to date a guy who’s a narcissist. After all, who wants to end up in a bitter divorce battle like Christie Brinkley, whose ex-husband, Peter Cook, (who admitted to lying and cheating) was diagnosed as narcissistic by a court psychiatrist during their publicized divorce trial proceedings. But how do you tell if a person is a narcissist before you get caught up in their web of egocentricity? We took a look at the actual key factors in the diagnosis for narcissism and found out that a lot of women we know have the real life experience to back up the facts. All the info you need to know, after the jump…

Sure, the holidays are filled with great food, fun parties, and general good cheer (I was at a crowded Macy’s yesterday, and I wasn’t shoved once!), but for a lot of people, this is anything but the most wonderful time of year. Those of us in periods of transition—even positive ones—are especially susceptible to the feelings of loneliness, frustration, depression, and the stress the holidays can elicit. After the jump, a few tips for surviving the holidays during some of life’s biggest transitions.

Already, the holidays are right around the corner, and before you know it, they’ll be here. But come Christmas Day, if everyone’s supposed to be brimming with cheer, why is mom crying at the stove and Uncle Pete hanging out down at the local bar? Probably because of all the baggage we carry into the holidays. Luckily, First30Days.com has created a how to guide to surviving the season. It all comes down to the Three F’s: family, finances, and food—and if we can add a fourth—fun! After the jump, how to handle your family during the holidays.

The morning after a recent tryst, I was mortified to find two giant purple hickies on my neck. Even more painful: I limped through the rest of the weekend because we had gotten a little (ahem) enthusiastic in the sack. Determined to avoid more bedroom battle-scars, I turned to science to find out how to get off without getting injured. My tricks, after the jump…

Whether you’re getting hitched or embracing the modern tradition of premarital cohabitation, moving in with your significant other is a big deal. From fighting for the covers every night to waking up with the person you love each morning, this new chapter in your life—especially the first 30 days—may be rife with happy moments and potential conflicts. While there’s no foolproof plan to avoiding relationship complications after you move in together, following these tips will help make the transition that much easier.

So, let’s say your political candidate of choice lost last night…or years ago. If you’re driving a vintage Volvo that supports Mondale/Ferraro or you’re too distraught to cover up the McCain/Palin sticker on the back of your Durango with one that says MY OTHER CAR IS A ZAMBONI (I’m looking at you, hockey moms), here’s how to remove it completely. Because if ever there was a time for change, it’s now. 

Growing up, I learned there are three touchy topics that can turn people from Dr. Jekyll into Mr. Hyde: Politics, Religion, and Money. These days, how can politics not be on the tips of everybody’s lips? How do you handle it when you and your own family are on opposite sides of the political fence?

I’ve got thirteen people in my immediate family: my parents, myself, four siblings and their spouses, and two outspoken nieces. Although only eleven of us are actually eligible to vote, my not-yet-voting-age nieces are damn well informed. As you can imagine, our family dinners tend to get heated, and we’ve got a recipe for disaster. So, here’s how I deal with my family politically.

A few weeks into dating him, when it wasn’t even clear that we were doing more than falling into bed and blogging the pillow talk the morning after, he texted me to ask, “We’re not secret right?”

“Secret?” I wrote back. “Aren’t we on Flickr?”

That’s the moment when it got, as the uselessly succinct Facebook menu options put it, both “serious” and “complicated.”

Our relationship wasn’t founded simply on this trendy sort of self-disclosure: we were just reporting on our sex lives before anyone else did.  It shouldn’t have shocked me, let alone the audience we gained along the way, that it’d all have to end online, too.  So how do you deal with a breakup like that, without breaking up with the Internet?

Yeehaw! Tonight is the much anticipated Vice-Presidential debate between Democrat Joe Biden and Republican Sarah Palin. We haven’t been this excited for a VP debate since, well, ever! Everyone we know is watching, and chances are, everyone you know is too, so why not use this as an excuse to throw a total RAGER? After the jump, our tips for throwing a positively patriotic debate party.

Whether it’s sitting in silence during dinner or enduring the long, uncomfortable pauses when he’s out with you and your friends, dating a shy guy can create some incredibly frustrating situations. What you might not realize, however, is that inspiring an introverted date to open up is surprisingly simple. “With a shy guy, you have to take the lead more often,” says Diana Kirschner, Ph.D., a recurring guest psychologist on “The Today Show” and author of “Love in 90 Days: The Essential Guide to Finding Your Own True Love”. “It may seem like a challenge, but once you give him a few little pushes in the right direction, he’ll open up to you with ease.” Find Dr. Kirschner’s hints on how to encourage your guy to take a walk on the wildly talkative side, after the jump…

It’s become my understanding that “sex on the beach” is a cliché that leads to sand in bad places.  However, sex and beach are both words that bring to mind the ultimate summer fling.  Scantily clad bodies, sun, surf, outdoor bars, gleaming tans, it all makes for a lovely little fantasy.  Unfortunately, fantasies often come to an end.  Sorry kid, time to wake up from that dream.  Fall is almost here!  So how are you going to let your summer fling fade gently into the sunset?  Here are my tips:

(WO)MAN UP: I don’t like people who ignore—they have absolutely no backbone and are cowards.  Own up to what you’re doing. Make it clear that it is O-V-E-R.  This was fun, but now it’s done.  You don’t want to get stuck with a Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction: “I will not be IGNORED, Daniel!”

I remember watching “Dynasty” in the ‘80s and thinking that Krystle and Alexis Carrington were so fantastically glam. Their glitzy, sequined dresses, shellacked hair, long, red talons and crimson lips were just IT, you know? If I saw those cats on TV today, however, I’d probably mistake them for two campy transvestites and wonder why they weren’t on Bravo. I admit, though, that I’d likely still find their red lips and nails awesome; there’s just something about a red pucker and red digits that screams “Respect me, bitch!” Whenever I try to wear both at the same time, however, I feel that I look like a trashy whore and not a powerful diva, so I asked Ashunta Sheriff, makeup artist for Christian Dior, on how to wear red well. Her beauty breakdown, after the jump…

Breakups are bad enough without looking like a total fool in the aftermath. So, in a bold move of honesty, and to help save others in the same place, I’m going to admit that in the throes of some past breakups I’ve been a little bit intense. I’ve learned my lessons on what not to do through a lot of tears, friend and family interventions, and often through making huge mistakes. And now I will pass along this harnessed wisdom to you.

Now, there are probably a lot of people who are just as stubborn as me, who in the face of rejection might just want to burn their ex’s stuff and cause a huge scene—to hell with other people’s advice. However, I’m going to beg you not to – it’s not worth it. Of course, just for clarification, if someone did something truly horrendous that warrants major destruction, such as cheating? Well then all bets are off.

Achieving that Brigette Bardot-esque “bedroom hair” look is damn tricky. I tried it once, and instead of getting sexy, sultry, I-just-rolled-out-of-bed sexpot locks, I wound up with messy, unkempt, Amy Winehouse-in-her- darkest-days hair. Not pretty, to say the least. To make sure I get it right the next time, I consulted Liam Carrey, stylist from New York’s Ted Gibson salon, for his top tips on how to get glam—not grunge—bedroom hair.

1. Consider what your hair naturally does in the morning, and use that as your inspiration.
“Bedroom hair” is soft, not particularly well-manicured hair with lots of texture and loose, tousled messiness—essentially, what you get when you just wake up, but prettier, Carrey says. After you drag your butt out of bed in the morning, look at your hair in the mirror, paying careful attention to the volume you get at the crown and the natural waves and bends it has taken on. “Creating your ‘bedroom hair’ look should be a cleaned-up, prettier version of your reflection,” he explains.

Color me cynical ladies, but let’s face it—no matter how great your relationship might be going at the moment, chances are it’s going to end. And while breaking up is never pleasant, why make the inevitable anymore painful than it has to be? Since there are very few “great” ways to dump a man, we’re going to list all the ways you shouldn’t go about kicking your once-loved to the curb:

If three (or four, five or six) is beginning to become a crowd in your relationship, it’s time to take action. While you can never make your boyfriend give up his friends, nudging them out of his life is well within your power. According to Janette Barber, author of the best-selling book “Breaking the Rules, Last Ditch Tactics for Landing the Man of Your Dreams”, all it takes to make your man break ties with his annoying pals is your showing him their true colors. “And if for some odd reason that fails,” she says, “there are always ways to drive them away!” For strategies on how to show your guy’s most irksome friends the door, read on…