My back hurts just looking at her. But for the record, don’t you guys think Angelina looks so much prettier and more glowing when she’s pregs? It’s the glow of the added pregnancy weight, I think. [Premier of Kung Fu Panda, Cannes Film Festival, 5/15/08]

Jack Black let it slip during an interview that Angelina Jolie is having twins and she confirmed the news. The two are promoting Kung Fu Panda...oh who cares? IT’S TWINS! [AccessHollywood,com]

Nothing causes more boners than an action movie—especially when it stars a femme fatale who knows how to handle a gun.  Everyone loves a sharp shootin’, straight talkin’ lady whose looks alone could kill, but it’s even better when she’s actually a trained lethal weapon. In honor of the women who inspire us to fight for our rights (and wear something skin tight), here are The Frisky’s Top 5 Female Action Heroes.

5. Jane Fonda as Barbarella She’s bold, she’s blonde, and she won’t take no for an answer.  The stylish mod manhandler battles her way through the universe with a dozen outfits and one ray gun.

Angelina Jolie hasn’t signed on for a movie that didn’t suck for years (except, maybe, A Mighty Heart and, of course, Mr. & Mrs. Smith), but I really hope that Wanted will be an exception. James McAvoy. Actually using his sexy brogue. Guns. Violence. Assassins. Morgan Freeman narrating. A sex scene that even from the preview looks loin-burning. I haven’t been this excited for a movie that could seriously suck in so long.

Gwyneth Paltrow got a “C” tattooed on her thigh, Cindy Adams reported in today’s New York Post. That’s “C” for Chris Martin and Coldplay. I don’t understand getting a tattoo in honor of a significant other—a blood relative, maybe (after all, you’re already stuck with them forever). Perhaps this is a highly pessimistic opinion, but I think getting tattooed with someone’s name almost guarantees the relationship won’t last, as a few celebs have learned…

Celebs like Oprah, Bono, Angelina Jolie, and even Jessica Simpson try to do good by backing certain causes, but according to a Harris Poll, 51 percent of Americans say celebrities make little to no difference to the issues they support. Younger people are more likely to believe famous people have a positive influence, as are Democrats. For me, it really depends who the celeb is and whether it seems as though they really care about the cause they’re touting. Remember when Paris Hilton said she wanted to “use [her] fame in a good way”? Well, now she’s supposedly hosting a dog-grooming show in the U.K. [Reuters, Washington Post, AHN]

Did you hear? There’s an Angelina Jolie Sex Scandal brewing! In Touch dug up a bunch of “racy” photos from when she was 16 in which she models swimwear. Now, look, I get it that this kind of modeling, when you’re underage can be a little grody, but I’m pretty sure Angie lived in Europe back then and they’re way more tolerant of pre-teen sexuality there. Also, all of the bathing suits she sports are pretty heinous and not especially revealing, at least compared to today’s standards. Above is the video done during the shoot, in which Angelina’s pouty poses were apparently inspired by Marky Mark and The Funky Bunch’s “Good Vibrations”! [DListed]

Yeah, so, yesterday Star said that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie got married in a New Orleans ceremony. Today, Us Weekly and People have sources saying that it’s total hogwash. This has been the biggest emotional rollercoaster of a weekend of our adult lives.

Obviously we live in a celebrity obsessed culture and that has never been more apparent than in the last few months, as the celeb weeklies fought to be the first to feature the stars’ newly born bundles of joy. People won the battle for photos of Max Bratman (Christina Aguilera’s son), Harlow Madden (daughter of Nicole Richie and Joel Madden), and Max and Emme Anthony (J.Lo and Marc Anthony’s tots), but at a pretty hefty price. The allegedly paid $1.5 million, $1 million, and $6 million respectively for the shoots, but those numbers put together are what people are guesstimating pictures of Angelina and Brad’s rumored twins will fetch. Cuh-razy. [Pop Sugar]

Every once and a while they publish these silly reports that show, through an extended family tree, just how famous people are related to each other. Last time the media latched on to a story like this, we found out Dick Cheney and Barack Obama were related. This time, the news is a lil’ better for ol’ Barry, as it seems he is a distant kin of Brad Pitt! Meanwhile, Hillary Clinton is somehow related to Angelina Jolie. Umm, question: how can we get our hands on this funny little blood line determining gizmo? We’d like to find out the likelihood of ever receiving a “Happy Holidays From The Jolie-Pitt Clan” card. [TrueMors]