Already, the holidays are right around the corner, and before you know it, they’ll be here. But come Christmas Day, if everyone’s supposed to be brimming with cheer, why is mom crying at the stove and Uncle Pete hanging out down at the local bar? Probably because of all the baggage we carry into the holidays. Luckily, First30Days.com has created a how to guide to surviving the season. It all comes down to the Three F’s: family, finances, and food—and if we can add a fourth—fun! After the jump, how to handle your family during the holidays.

Raise your hand if you’ve never had a broken heart. You there, in the back? Yeah, you can leave. The rest of us know that breaking up truly is hard to do. They say it takes roughly half the time you were with someone to get over them, but who really has a year or two to kill the ghost of a relationship gone wrong? If you handle the first month after a breakup right, you’ll be on a better track to move forward more quickly. We’re not suggesting that you can get over it completely and wake up on Day 31 ready to jump back into dating—though if you accomplish that, we might want to bring you in as some kind of breakup expert. But there’s a lot you can do (and, yes, not do) in the first 30 days after a breakup to mitigate the fallout.

Whether you’re getting hitched or embracing the modern tradition of premarital cohabitation, moving in with your significant other is a big deal. From fighting for the covers every night to waking up with the person you love each morning, this new chapter in your life—especially the first 30 days—may be rife with happy moments and potential conflicts. While there’s no foolproof plan to avoiding relationship complications after you move in together, following these tips will help make the transition that much easier.

Growing up, I learned there are three touchy topics that can turn people from Dr. Jekyll into Mr. Hyde: Politics, Religion, and Money. These days, how can politics not be on the tips of everybody’s lips? How do you handle it when you and your own family are on opposite sides of the political fence?

I’ve got thirteen people in my immediate family: my parents, myself, four siblings and their spouses, and two outspoken nieces. Although only eleven of us are actually eligible to vote, my not-yet-voting-age nieces are damn well informed. As you can imagine, our family dinners tend to get heated, and we’ve got a recipe for disaster. So, here’s how I deal with my family politically.

In my last column, when I gave five tips for staying chic for cheap during this economic crunch (and beyond), I promised to tell you everything you need to know for throwing a kick-ass clothing swap. Not only is a clothing swap a great excuse to organize your closets, get rid of stuff you no longer want, and gather a group of girlfriends for an afternoon or evening of cocktails and clothes, it’s also an opportunity to score some totally free new-to-you outfits and accessories. I mentioned in my last column that I found one of my favorite dresses — a vintage summer maxi dress — at a clothing swap a couple years ago, but I’ve also scored some cool jewelry, a couple silk vintage slips, a few purses, and once I even nabbed a pair of barely-worn Seven jeans that fit like a glove (for once, I was grateful for my curvy hips). Hey, one woman’s trash is another woman’s favorite pants, so after the jump, my top six tips for throwing a successful clothing swap…

“Find your place, and let the world gravitate to you. None of this mix-and-mingle business.”—Diana Vreeland, former Vogue editor-in-chief

There was a period in my early twenties, not too long after college graduation, and even sooner after the painful break-up of my first real relationship, that I hopscotched through a series of dead-end jobs (seven in four months!), dated recklessly, and pumped my body with substances I wouldn’t clean a carburetor with these days. Then, one day, perusing the self-help aisle in Borders, I came across a book on the “quarterlife crisis.” I picked it up, found a comfy chair in the back of the store, and skimmed enough pages to understand there was a name for what I was going through, a phase, and it was just a matter of time before I’d move past it.

The next best thing to having your own wedding is getting invited to one by your boyfriend. There’s something about a man who wants you on his arm at a celebration of love—with the added lubricant of an open bar. So when my boyfriend Mike asked me to be his date to his friend’s big day, I was so excited I nearly went into debt over a pricey cheese plate present and a new dress with matching lingerie—not that I planned on keeping it all on that night.

When it comes to men, I have a type. Physically, he’s tall and lean. He’s also the soft-spoken intellectual and creative type. And more often than not, he’s emotionally unavailable and self-absorbed. And yet, I date him over and over again, like a broken record stuck on one false note.

This might be why there’s an entire dating industry geared toward women. And as much as you might want to blame it on Sex and the City, the truth of the matter is that many women, myself included, don’t always go for the right type of guy. You may now cue the latest romantic comedy that you don’t want to believe is loosely based on your life.

We live in a world where Paris Hilton makes approximately 20 billion times as much as your average public schoolteacher, and talk show host Oprah Winfrey has a net worth double that of a lot of small countries. What do these celebrities do to earn such riches? Sure, Paris had her reality show, but surely the guy who picks up your trash every morning before dawn sweats way more than she ever will. Does anyone really believe that George Clooney works harder than a middle school teacher? I sure don’t. So maybe it’s time that—instead of begrudging our stars their super-sized salaries—we make them earn it, by learning from their high-profile relationship ups and downs.

Jennifer Aniston: No matter how beautiful, rich and successful you are, if you’re not married with a baby by 40, certain people will still insist you’re a sad, desperate loser.

I enjoy a good snoop—when I’m in a house that’s not my own, I have been known to rifle through a drawer or two, check out the medicine cabinet, and try on the owner’s clothing (including a wedding dress once). A few months ago, when my fiance was out of town, I went through all his photos of him with his ex-girlfriend. Sometimes, if he leaves his laptop on and his email is up there on the screen just BEGGING for me to take a looksie, I’ll glance, but never actually open anything. Then again, I have never seen anything that got my curiosity brewing beyond control.

The point is, everyone snoops, at least a little, and no one more so than the protagonist of the book I’m reading, Whacked by Jules Asner. It’s chick lit, but it’s not crappy or badly written, though it’s definitely beach-worthy. In the book, Dani uses her skills as a writer for CSI-esque crime show to snoop on everyone from the owners of the open houses she attends to her no-good boyfriend. I have to say, I was pretty impressed with her tactics and tips, as well as some of the handy online tools she used, so I decided to assemble a guide to snooping, after the jump. Don’t blame me if you get caught red-handed though. I am hardly a professional.

If three (or four, five or six) is beginning to become a crowd in your relationship, it’s time to take action. While you can never make your boyfriend give up his friends, nudging them out of his life is well within your power. According to Janette Barber, author of the best-selling book “Breaking the Rules, Last Ditch Tactics for Landing the Man of Your Dreams”, all it takes to make your man break ties with his annoying pals is your showing him their true colors. “And if for some odd reason that fails,” she says, “there are always ways to drive them away!” For strategies on how to show your guy’s most irksome friends the door, read on…

Yesterday, Brooke Hogan continued her quest for attention by posting phony mugshots on her MySpace page. Not only is this kind of pathetic, but it’s also a little insensitive to her brother Nick, who is serving time in jail for a 2007 car crash that severely injured his friend. So I realized that it’s time to have a little chat with Brooke, since it seems her parents’ divorce has left her to guide her own career.

According to Dr. Sue Johnson (not to be confused with the old Sex Talk’s silver fox, Sue Johanson), there are three types of sex.  Short and sweet, long and aerobic, drunken and sloppy? Well, that’s what we thought!  But the doc breaks it down a little more scientifically. Sue says emotional presence is the biggest aphrodisiac and it defines the degrees of intercourse.  The freedom of speech you can achieve with a partner actually informs your Big O. With that in mind, here are the sexy levels of sex—whether you’re in a relationship or not—as Doc Johnson sees it, after the jump…

Kate Moss has reportedly been seeking advice from Jerry Springer—yes, that Jerry Springer—as she has been concerned about her friend Rhys Ifans after his split from Sienna Miller. “Jerry has patiently listened to her worries and given her some sterling advice, a source told Britain’s Daily Star “Instead of hating Sienna for upsetting her friend, Kate has managed to see things from her perspective and has calmed down about the whole, sorry affair.” We are so curious about what Jerry said to her, maybe, “Kate, he could be doing worse! Sienna could have had someone else’s baby while they were dating and pretended it was his!” [AHN]

“Can a woman get cervical cancer if a smoker routinely goes down on her?”—Paranoid About My Puffer, Houston, TX

There hasn’t been any real medical research to support this claim, but you’re not totally crazy. If I had to take a guess, I’d say having a smoker go down on you is like putting Equal in your coffee. It’s not awesome for you, but if you don’t eat eight bathtubs full of it a day you’ll be fine.

“What percentage of women have an orgasm during intercourse? The stats I’ve read really seem to vary, with some studies making it seem kind of rare. Is that true?” - Curious About Climaxes, Cleveland, OH

General statistics (which vary as much as your orgasms do) show a whopping 75% of women failing to reach orgasm during intercourse. 12% percent NEVER EVER achieve one, even through self-stimulation.
A lot of this has to do with knowing your body well enough to determine what turns you on and what doesn’t. I didn’t achieve my first orgasm until my mid-20’s, and didn’t find a partner I could have regular orgasms with until I was almost 30 (I’m 29 now, so you do the math).

Some young man wrote Debonair Magazine about graduating from college and not being able to get any ladies in the real world.

I have been out of school for about 18 months now and I’m missing the fraternity party days and how it easy was to hook up with a girl. How do you recommend picking up a girl in a bar? I feel that women that go out often are all so full of themselves, only want a free drink, and just don`t respond to anyone unless they`re great looking. —Disgruntled

Some of the advice given is as abominable as the “problem.” After the jump is the worst of it.

“Is there a secret to being awesome at oral sex? I’m not sure if I’m doing it well, and I’m not about to discuss my technique with my friends.”—Needing Lessons, Santa Fe, NM

The real secret to oral sex that nobody ever talks about is that you have to be into it! You know how passionate you get about buying shoes or watching the latest episode of America’s Next Top Model? Put that same gleeful cheer into fellatio, and you’ll have your guy going through the roof.

With that said, there’s a few “tricks of the trade” (I totally sound like a hooker) that will spice up the average beej. My favorites, after the jump…

Vong has an easy way to help men remember what they need to do to get girls. Take four minutes out of your day and learn something from Vong. It will be worth it. [YouTube]