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If you’ve ever wondered what happens in the tiny corners of the internet where people expose their most vulnerable selves, I have an answer: They put their hardened penises into women’s shoes. Keep reading »
Designer Silvia Fado has constructed a new line of high heels that use shock-absorbent pneumatics, hydraulics, and rubber, and design normally reserved for sports footwear to create an ergonomic high-heeled experience.
I won’t even ask if you can afford buying them because the answer is “probably not”: On Fado’s page for the Kinetic Traces footwear line, there are no prices, just an invitation to contact them if you’d like to have a pair made for yourself (a commercial line will be out later in the year). They are truly beautiful shoes, albeit — to me, at least — kind of intimidating. I’m recovering from a jacked-up ankle and I want none of that. Keep reading »
The vibe I’m going for with my fashion choices for fall is best described as ’70s high school arts and crafts teacher. You know the cool female teacher at the beginning of “Dazed and Confused” who tells her students that the 4th of July is basically a celebration of “a bunch of slave-owning aristocratic white males [who] didn’t want to pay their taxes”? That’s what I’m going for, only my muse is more into macrame than Das Kapital. ANYWAY, the key piece to any respectable ’70s art teacher look is a pair of clogs. I just ordered this seriously sweet, modernized take on the classic clunky shoe from Madewell (also available in black). I love the heel height and sling back style, plus the closed toe means I’ll be able to wear them well into the cooler months. If you’re feeling as groovy as I am about these kicks, click through to see three outfit ideas (inspired by imaginary events/activities) to wear them with. [$124.99, Madewell]
They say “The higher the heel, the closer to God.” But I say, “The higher the heel, the farther you fall when you trip in those heels and bust ass.” Stilettos are sexy as hell; they’ll give you the illusion of legs for days and can even boost your self-confidence, but the price of beauty ain’t cheap. Any woman who’s ever slipped on a pair of stilettos knows that new heights come with their own set of struggles, and cobblestone streets are just the tip of the iceberg. Here are 13 pain-in-the-ass problems all too familiar to the heel-wearing kind. Keep reading »
I have a pretty serious (and embarrassing) mommy blog-reading habit, so for years now I’ve watched internet moms traipse around in Salt Water sandals, raving about them every chance they got. I put off ordering them online for years because I didn’t want to buy shoes I’d never tried on, but I eventually just guessed my size and ordered a pair — best decision ever. Now I finally understand what all the fuss is about. I’ve spent years trying to find a flat summer shoe that’s actually functional for wearing on trips to the beach or vacations that require lots of walking, and my search is finally over. Most of us remember Salt Waters from when we were kids, so I guess they’re technically considered children’s shoes, but the grown-up sizes are equally as comfy, durable, and most importantly, walkable. They are some of the only shoes I can wear the entire day without hitting some kind of pain limit around hour five. Keep reading »
Cat lady PSA: these Paw Print shoes by Irregular Choice allow you to walk on kitties all day long. The shoes are designed by Dan Sullivan, and in the place of a typical 4-inch heel is a 4-inch smiling cat figurine. Last year, the company sold similar shoes with bunnies, gnomes, and even little Santas serving as heels, but let’s be real, none of those come close to competing with these cat creations. Anyone who owns a pair of these is living the dream as far as I’m concerned, and should probably be my best friend so I can borrow them. [Image via Irregular Choice]