When it comes to tasteful topics of discussion (no pun intended), oral sex doesn’t always top the list. In fact, even the most sex-savvy women sometimes find themselves shying away from publicly discussing this polarizing activity. There are some girls who simply will not give (let’s say it all together now) blow jobs, and some guys who simply won’t date those girls. Likewise, you’ve probably found yourself in a position, quite literally, where you’re wondering why someone won’t put their mouth on your lady bits. Read more on College Candy…
A new report conducted by the Urban Institute on the economics of sex work in the United States turned up some interesting results in the financial life of a pimp. The Institute interviewed imprisoned former pimps and asked them how they allocated their funds. The graph above reflects the percentage that participating pimps reported spending on each category. The economics of pimping were found to mimic other businesses (minus the expenditures on illegal substances and weapons). Researchers say that main difference between prostitution and other small business was that many of the pimps admitted to manipulating their employees into working for them, either by pretending to be romantically interested or by taking advantage of their weaknesses. Disturbingly, the pimps seem to have spent more on drugs and alcohol than condoms for their employees. [Washington Post]
Lindsay Lohan may keep track of her sexual conquests on paper, but in the 21st century, we can all use an app on our phone. It’s called Nipple.io and it’s a spreadsheet containing detailed information about all of your sex partners. All the fuck-data is collected on the main Nipple.io site (which, by the way, is so riddled with typos — they may speak the language of love, but English is not their first language), which also features a “Tiger Woods Award” for the most active users each week. It looks to me like this will go from beta to bust: not even bros are anal enough (no pun intended) to input every handjob and fingerbang. And unless your list has Heath Ledger and James Franco on it, like Lindsay’s does, who cares? [Nipple.io via Nerve] [Image of a sex app via Shutterstock]
Today is March 14th, Pi Day, and in honor of this nerdiest of holidays, we thought we’d help you infuse some math swagger into your flirting game. Because come on, what is sexier than math? Nothing. Nothing is sexier than math. Here are 10 pickup lines sure to charm your way into a hot date, or at least score you a sexy romp on your horizontal axis, if you know what we mean…
In my two-part travel sex episode of Funny Girl Sex Guide, I rather cynically declared that the entire male population of New York City is unfuckable. That, I am willing to admit, was a bit of an exaggeration. Or at least I hope that it is, because I’ve decided that it’s impractical and silly to rely on my relatively infrequent travel schedule as the only opportunity I take to get laid. Therefore, I’m in the market for a fuck buddy, aka someone to sex on the regular without commitment. While I keep my eye peeled for possible candidates, I’m reminding myself, and now you, of six very important rules for having a successful friends with benefits relationship. Watch above!
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We know that conservative Republicans go batshit insane over the idea of the Affordable Healthcare Act covering preventative health care like birth control. But thanks to “The Daily Show,” we now know that America has bigger problems, literally: Medicare is spending millions on penis pumps. The program has spent $172 million in the past five years, to be exact. Apparently there are a lot of limp penises in need in the United States. How did contraception manage to be considered a more controversial use of government money than a contraption that makes your dick big and hard? Of course, Samantha Bee addresses this hypocrisy in a way that nobody else could. [NARAL]
Cosmo is well on its way to owning the “food/sex experimentation” beat. First, Anna Breslaw attempted to masturbate on the NYC subway while eating a gyro, and now Mark Shrayber tried to use pizza as a “sex toy.” (At least it happened in the privacy of his own home.) The phrase “pizza as a sex toy” is probably conjuring images of mozzarella cheese and tomato sauce stuck to a thatch of pubic hair. Let me explain in more detail how one uses pizza as a “sex toy.” Hint: it’s not so different from the man who used a Domino’s Pizza as a gloryhole and burnt his penis or the teen who recently posted a video of himself fucking a hot pocket. Pizza sex is en trende, peeps! Keep reading »
Kiss My Lingerie, a specialty adult shop in Gonzales, Louisiana, has posted a sign on it’s door indicating that it accepts most credit cards and EBT cards, which is federal-issued card for welfare and food stamps. The owner of the store says she began accepting EBT cards, better known as Louisiana Purchase cards, eight months ago because she didn’t want to “discriminate against customers.”
An anonymous woman who works nearby the shop found this development very upsetting. “We were told anything could be purchased there, with the food stamp card. No child I know eats edible underwear,” she said. Keep reading »
When other people think about their past and get a little misty, they might be thinking about things like their hometown and how their formative experiences there made them the adult they are today.
I, on the other hand, grew up op on the Internet. Many of my “old haunts” are sex blogs, and seeing some of my favorites go dark over the years has made me as wistful as others might be if they found out that their favorite, childhood roller rink burned down.
I found independently-written sex blogs shortly after my formal education ended (four years of abstinence-only sex ed). One errant click as I was looking for tips on how to shave “down there” without giving myself razor burn, and I was plunged into someone’s personal account of planning an orgy. Keep reading »