Somewhere, last night, a young man stood in his apartment wearing nothing but a condom. He stretched his arms out, closed his eyes, and whispered “if I wear it, they will come. THEN COME AND COME AGAIN.”
The condom was one of dozens he keeps strategically hidden throughout his apartment. He keeps a pile in his nightstand drawer, another pile in the bathroom, another 20 or so are tucked in between couch cushions, books on the bookshelf, and in the cupboard, hidden behind jars of peanut butter.
He considered, briefly, wearing a long string of connected condoms like a bandolier. Keep reading »
As the old saying goes, the problem with doing a children’s fashion photo shoot on a beach in France is that you never know when a naked man might wander in the shot. What? They don’t say that? Oh. Well, French online fashion retailer La Redoute managed to miss a random sun worshipper’s exposed cock’n'balls in a photo advertising kids’ T-shirts. (Above, I have helpfully indicated the aforementioned French peen using Photoshop, a tool La Redoute might need to re-familiarize themselves with.) Les oopsies! [The Gloss]
In 2012, we want to go to yoga more often, spend more time relaxing on the weekends and take a trip to somewhere tropical. Oh, and we have a few sex resolutions too — 2012 is here and we’re ready to have some fun. After the jump are 30 sex resolutions — a few of them are ours (but we’re not telling which), while the rest are from other Frisky staffers and female friends. What are your sex resolutions for the new year? Keep reading »
As a fan of gummy candies — Sour Patch Kids forever! — I’m distressed by the existence of Spermies. The claim that there’s been “no salt added” doesn’t do much to reassure me that these fast-swimmers go down easy. No thanks!
“[Bob Geldof] and Sting had gone to do an interview with a rock journalist, and the interview turned into a drinking session. At one point, the journalist asked how long they could go for, and Geldof said that he was a three-minute man, but, as Sting did yoga, he could probably go for hours …’Well, haven’t you heard of tantric sex?’ [Sting replied] … At the time I thought it was very amusing but then it sort of became a cause celebrate … The tantric hours got extended and, suddenly, I was doing it all day long. Well, if only! … Sting said that 21 years ago. He has just turned 60, and I imagine it will carry on going until he drops.”
– Trudie Styler on how Sting got to be known as the poster boy for tantric sex. I guess she finally wanted to put to bed (no pun intended) rumors that her and Sting do it 24-hours a day. I don’t care what she says. I still want to believe it. [Spinner]
Thank you, Kathie Lee Gifford, for all the joy you’ve brought us this year on “The Today Show.” Thank you for day drinking and doing silly things. And thank you for this one last “der” moment, where you reference a blow job without even knowing it by mistakenly thinking “BJ” stands for “before Jay” (Hoda’s new boyfriend). I’m sure Hoda Kotb and Jay thank you as well. [Perez Hilton]