For the week of March 17-23, 2008
Pisces (February 20-March 20)
Your misunderstood villainness will be in full effect, causing undue mayhem wherever you go and inciting love affairs that you will end cruelly and coldly — but to you, it’ll be all in a day’s work. Yes, there’ll be no accounting for your behavior this week, but what can you do when born with a sex appeal so strong and passion to love so intense?
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“My boyfriend and I feel the need to have sex at most apartment/house parties that we go to. Is this weird? And what are some of the best ways to pull it off without getting caught?” — Party Crashing, Dallas, TX
This is kind of like my need to do a number two at people’s parties. It’s a christening of sorts. Or, simply a marking of territory. But even though I’m the resident “sexpert”, I can honestly tell you I’ve never had sex with a guy at a party. With that said, I don’t think you’re weird. I actually want to know what kind of parties you’re going to where you can find space to have sex. I live in NYC, so the parties I’m invited to usually involve a studio apartment and an oven in the closet. The closest I ever got to “doing it” was changing a tampon in the bathroom.
My advice? The larger the party the better. The larger the house the better. If you want to be discreet, go into an unoccupied room and lock the door. Worse case somebody knocks on the door and then you stop. I think if you’re having sex at parties in the first place, a part of you wants to get caught. That’s why I poop with the door open. Keep reading »
We sent out Frisky TV reporter Lori to ask men and women on the street a puzzling question — would you rather watch a dirty video with your mom and dad, or one starring mom and dad? Here are the dismayed responses. Keep reading »
â€œSex — Whatâ€™s the big deal?â€ A French Museum of Science and Industry exhibit for children is asking that very question. The â€œcheeky, hands-onâ€ experience is adapted from a book by Zep and HÃ©lÃ¨ne Brulle and features a comic girl and boy as hosts. Kid visitors, unlike most adult sexual experiences, start off â€œBeing in Loveâ€ in the â€œGallery of Kissesâ€ where they can flirt or hang out on a heart-shaped bed. Sadly, they must head to the â€œPubertyâ€ section next, an adult-free zone decked out like a bathroom, where students get a first-hand look at whatâ€™s going to happen to their bodies. (Weâ€™re sure a few kids run out crying.) Keep reading »
Passover is a spring time Jewish holiday that commemorates when my people sprung from slavery in Egypt by not allowing us to eat leavened bread products. In addition to being deprived of everything from delicious bagels to even the sprinkles on ice cream, devout tribe members have not been allowed to take Viagra since its introduction in 1998, on account of the little blue pill’s gelatin casing isn’t Kosher. Now, building pyramids sounds hard, but eight days without sex sounds really unfair! However, after a decade in the desert, there’s finally hope women will be screaming “Oh God!” through the holiday. Pfizer Pharmaceuticals in Israel is switching its gelatin-encasing recipe to keep the men Kosher for Passover. So while you’re not able to eat bread that rises, you will still able to get a rise out of your mensch. [BBC] Keep reading »
What are some easy steps to having a threesome where no one gets hurt? — Menage A Trois, Greenwich, CT
You’d think there’d be a Threesome for Dummies or Emily Post’s Guide to Entertaining Your Third Party…but alas, there’s not. Instead, you’ve got me.
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Have you ever dreamed that you slept with your father? Or rode a mechanical bull while a coworker watched? We have and were disturbed for months. Fortunately, dreams don’t always mean what you think they do, and having sex with your father is nothing to worry about, so long as it only happens in your subconscious. Here, we ask psychologist Veronica Tonay, Ph.D. to decode your crazy dreams each and every week, so that you can sleep at night, and dream some more.
THE DREAM IN QUESTION: I was a guest co-host on The View. I had to go on in 30 seconds, but I was naked and wasn’t wearing any makeup. And Rosie (yes, I realize she’s no longer on the show) was like, “GET ON SET OR ELSE!” I was terrified. —In The Nude On National TV, New York, NY Keep reading »
Cosmopolitanâ€™s articles can induce so much puke, sometimes I think the magazine is making me bulimic. The sex advice usually applies to girls who drink too much at frat parties or bored housewives who just canâ€™t figure out their husband is gay, but this month thereâ€™s a gem that can put any woman on top of her game. How many times have you bent like a pretzel to impress your partner? Well, now itâ€™s time for you to hump him with his knees to his chest. Ha! The Kama Sutra sex position of the week — with the least sexy name, The Erotic Accordion — is actually pretty hot. First step: Try to not get hungry for Mexican food when they call a penis a â€œhot tamale.â€ Step 2: Get your man fetal, but lying on his back. Step 3: Straddle him, then lower yourself down and start the low-ride. [WARNING: This thigh workout is not for the faint of Stairmaster.] Now, go make some beautiful accordion music together! [Cosmo] Keep reading »
The Church of England just wrote another bible and this one is all about S-E-X. With 150,000 thousand divorces a year and even one of their own Bishop’s 25-year marriage breaking up, the Church decided to author a how-to guide about the “holy and wonderful” thing that takes two (at least). The book, entitled “Growing Together” offers advice for married couples on everything from turn-ons to sexy money issues. It also has saucy true stories! The Bishop of Croydon said, “There’s an assumption that church people are from a different planet. We’re not. We live in the real world and are trying to help people talk about things that often don’t get talked about.” It’s official, everyone loves to talk dirty and for about $15, you can hear what the Anglican Church has to say. [The Sun]
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Supermarket commercials usually advertise fresh food, but this one for the U.K.â€™s MySupermarket.com is all about the fresh clients. In the funny ad, a British hottie starts a sexy/gross food fight after seeing his wife bent over the refrigerator. Let’s just say, it begins by asking “How low can you go?” and then ends with sausage. [Ad Week]
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