The first thing you need to know is that I didn’t start masturbating until the age of 17. I’d gone through the ol’ puberty at 12 – I’d felt the universal stirrings down below – but it took me that extra five years to work out what I ought to do about it. Had I been interviewed at age 15 about female arousal, I would’ve said something like, “The only way to reach orgasm is through having sex.”
I believed that this feeling, whatever it was, could be … solved, let’s say, solely through use of the male penis. (As though there’s any other kind!)
But, oh: How wrong I was.
It’s hard to remember exactly what happened when finally it struck me all those years later that I could tend to things myself. I know the movie “Gas, Food, Lodgings” was involved. I’d been watching it in the basement of my family’s empty house, and there’d been some scene wherein some attractive male actor pushes Ione Skye up against a wall, and then they have very satisfying sex in an upright position in what appears to be a cave. It was terribly arousing, and the house was so terribly empty, and somehow, finally, I saw my right hand, and I knew. Keep reading »
A music video for Ginuwine’s “Pony” featuring My Little Ponies doing unspeakable things is so wrong that it’s right. It’s some straight up Pony Sutra stuff. Think Charlie Sheen’s harem house, but with humans. [Buzzfeed]
There’s artwork and then there is earthwork, which is just what it sounds like: artwork built into the ground. This naked woman is “Northumberlandia,” a 1,300-by-830-ft long piece of landscape sculpture located in Northumberland in the UK. It’s the largest piece of “human body” earthwork in the world. Keep reading »
Any new or cutting edge sexual info I get usually comes from Dan Savage’s podcast or TLC’s “Strange Sex,” so I try to keep abreast of those. Of course, I share anything stimulating that I learn with you. Sunday night’s episode of “Strange Sex” schooled me on sex furniture and sleep orgasms. And there was a guy who couldn’t get erections. (But that was just sad. I can’t write about him. Too depressing.) I know, you’re already getting excited. Settle down. Lessons forth coming.
First, sex furniture! I thought I knew what sex furniture was. I thought it was a fetish wherein one person pretended to be furniture. Where did I get that idea? Does that exist as well? Anyhow, this wasn’t about that. Keep reading »
Boobs and ass crack. You’d think it’d be easy to tell these two types of celebrity cleavage apart. But sometimes, given an odd angle, a creative outfit or plastic surgery, it can be more difficult than you think. Click through and see how well you can decipher the celebrity and their cleave. Good luck! You’re gonna need it.