Zergnet: Simply Irresistable
I stiffen as I enter the party, taking it all in. Moms (not MILFS) mill around in pastel lingerie. Nude men pass by, penises bobbing beneath their beer bellies. A DJ to my left plays Kid Rock’s “Cowboy.”
On the spiral staircase, someone’s legs spread in the air and a man stands, humping between them in time to Kid Rock’s backup singers. “Ridin’ at night ’cause I sleep all day. I can smell a pig from a mile away.”
I’m here undercover, reporting on the city’s first all bisexual swinger club. I’ve brought my husband and until now it was unclear if that meant I “owe him one” or he “owes me.” But as we’re whisked away for the tour, I mouth an apologetic “thank you” in his direction. Keep reading »
I guess Diesel got tired of its “Be Stupid” ad campaign and decided to just, you know, be stupid instead for its latest. The latest round of images to vomit forth from Diesel’s ad labs features a lot of people in their underpants. Sometimes their underpants come bearing slogans, like, “Today, I am your nurse,” “Today, I am your patient,” and “Tonight, I am your prisoner.” Today, I am confused by these messages. Are these supposed to help those among us who have difficulty expressing themselves when it comes to sex and, therefore, would rather express themselves through messages on their underwear? You tell me. But don’t tell me with your underpants. [Fashionising] Keep reading »
Slate’s Dear Prudence has gotten a letter from a woman with a real problem on her hands: her man has a tiny penis. She’s 30, and he’s a great guy, but his penis is so small, after Googling the matter, she came to the conclusion that he may have a “micropenis.” What’s the problem? “When you can’t feel anything during the act, that’s a problem.” We’re going to have to agree on that one.
Find out what Prudie advises, and then tell us in the comments what you’d tell the woman with the man with the small penis. Keep reading »
Oh, Steph, I need your help! I don’t know if you have ever had this question. But what can you do when you produce too much self-lube? My boyfriend and I of almost two years have been having this problem since we got together. To put it in his words “It’s like ASTRO-Glide down there. There is no friction.
Finally! My endless days of praying for that vibrator chess set of my dreams are over. Aruliden has created a very chic and very kinky chess set that replaces the usual queen, bishop, and pawn with discreet black vibrators. Apparently, the knight is shaped like anal beads. My word. Will wonders never cease? Of course, this vibrator chess set isn’t for just any chess player. It’s only for the discriminating, oversexed chess enthusiast. Ergo, the vibes have gold detailing, and the whole set sells for a mere … $7,000. Dang! Does this mean I won’t be getting one for Christmas? Oh, dear. [Co.Design] Keep reading »
We’re happy to see that one of our all-time favorite style, fashion, and design trend hunter bloggers is back, Trend de la Creme. After a hiatus, Ms. de la Creme is back with her usual wow-worthy mix of freakish fads and unique style posts. A few of our recent favorites include her frightening Halloween costume roundup that features this amazing sex doll costume, some hairy horsey stripper shoes, and an Afro-sporting nose hair trimmer for your man. [Trend de la Creme] Keep reading »
Brett Favre has tongues wagging again, but this time it’s not alcohol issues, painkiller addiction or yet another retirement announcement. Favre has been accused of sexually harassing at least three employees of the New York Jets, including Jenn Sterger, a Jets sideline reporter. Lawsuits and marital infidelity aside, the aspect of this story getting the most attention is that Favre allegedly sent pictures of his penis to Sterger. Of course, these photos have been leaked to the public along with some pretty pathetic voice mail messages from Favre to Sterger. Read more … Keep reading »
The Smoking Jacket has a pretty hilarious roundup of some of the strangest phone sex lines that you’ve (we assume) never heard of and (we hope) will never call. My favorite? Girls Farting Phonesex. That is the actual name of the service. “Yea, I know, It’s not normal for a girl to like to talk about something like a farting fetish, but who cares!” That comes from the associated blog. This makes me wonder what the girls have to do before they work a shift. Eat a lot of beans? Beano would not be a friend of the woman who farts into the phone for a living. Check out the rest at The Smoking Jacket. Keep reading »