Warning: Spoilers and NSFW video. We’ve had some bizarre sexual encounters in our day, but Marnie and Booth’s coupling on last night’s episode of “Girls” was beyond creepy (okay, and hilarious). When Marnie ran into “that smeege of a man” as Hannah called him (I’m stealing that!), Booth took her back to his place to show her his work. He proceeded to lock Marnie into his panic attack-inducing art installation cage where TV screens flickered disturbing images and Duncan Sheik’s “Barely Breathing” played on a loop. Meanwhile he checked his email and had a snack. Seriously, I almost couldn’t watch because I was getting claustrophobic. It was very Willy Wonka when he takes the kids on that crazy boat ride. Not to fret! It got weirder! Booth freed Marnie from his art prison, comforted her and fucked her, reciting a sex script so bizarre, I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. I don’t think Marnie did either. Seriously, this exact thing must have happened to one of the writers. It’s just not possible to make this shit up. Keep reading »
This innuendo-laden Dick Smith Foods commercial was made especially to run on Australia Day this coming weekend, but was deemed too offensive for TV. I happen to think it’s brilliant. We should all be so lucky as to watch this video and learn how to master dirty word play. Dick Smith says he’s determined to fight the decision and have the purposefully cheeky ad aired. Let’s support his cause. Say it with me: I Love Dick! Oh, and the video is NSFW if your employer takes sexual innuendo seriously. In which case … they are the enemy! [DListed]
Life. So many unanswered questions. Thank God Almie Rose is here to guide us through our most intimate quandaries. In this webisode, Almie helps us figure out how to masturbate when someone else — your roommate, your study buddy, or unwanted house guest — is in the room. Because you shouldn’t be deprived of yourself, just because someone else happens to be there…
I thought the Ladies of Manure Calendar was going to be the stinkiest calendar of the year, but I stand corrected. France’s From’ Girls (short for fromage) features a year’s worth of scantily clad ladies posing provocatively with stinky cheeses. YUM! [France 24]
As a child of pop culture, it should come as no little surprise that most of my psyche was formed by various cartoon and film studios and is tragically underequipped to manage real life, even to this day, which is why you can only find me on the Internet, as I tend to shun the sun like some kind of eyeless deep-cave newt.
While you can easily rely on film to teach you how to deal with everyday situations like terrorism, dinosaurs and hangovers, the sad truth is that the formation of one’s sexual identity is probably something best not placed in the hands of Bruce Willis or National Lampoon. I mean, I think.
As it happens, my sexual awakening was a slow, shameful thing spurred by a handful of pop culture icons that, for one reason or another, stirred something vaguely confusing deep inside me, and will now be used to stir something vaguely off-putting in all of you. Read more…