I don’t know? What do you say about something like this? A woman in a bikini top made out of plastic hands over her breasts? Heavy has compiled a list of the top 20 worst bathing suits, but I am going to have to declare this one the winner. It’s just … horrifying. To me, at least. I don’t know what to say other than keep your bikini top hands off me, please. [Heavy] Keep reading »
Now men can combine two of their favorite things: masturbation and competitive sports! The Count Machine Onahole is a revolutionary new masturbation device that keeps track of the number of strokes, calories burned, and the total time it takes for the user to achieve orgasm. For just $123 you can insert your throbbing member into a synthetic, plastic vag, attach the counting device, and pump away while the clock runs. And then, do it again and see if you can beat your best SPM (strokes per minute). The current record is held by a porn star who clocked in at 426 SPM. Beat that, guys! Literally. Beat it. [Weird Asia News] Keep reading »
I’m going to be honest with you. Knowing the proper term for armpit sex—it’s called Axillism, dummy!—totally made my day. I was also pretty stoked to know that a regular sex session burns about 200 calories, that socks can actually prevent orgasms, that Republicans are kinkier than Democrats, and that tights pants are one of the leading causes of impotence. More crazy sex facts that will make yours after the jump. [Online Schools]
I’ll get right to it: I seem to be hymenally/orgasmically challenged, and I’m wondering if you can shed any enlightenment on what goes on for me. I enjoy all the sexy activities and play time, but I rarely am able to achieve orgasm. I don’t receive any stimulation from my clitoris being touched or vibrated against, there’s a little sensation when firm pressure is applied, but that’s about it. So masturbation and oral sex are sort of a dud for me. Intercourse seems to be the only way I receive pleasure, and from what I’ve deduced it’s my G-spot that’s liking the attention. However, the more intense the stimulation tends to be, it also feels oddly painful at the same time internally (sort of like cramps or a tummy ache) so most of the time I can’t climax because of the discomfort. My gynecologist has always assured me she doesn’t see anything wrong “down there” so I’m not worried about that. I’m pretty open about my sex life with my friends. None of them have ever experienced anything like this, and I’ve never read about anything like this before. Is this a common problem for some women? Am I alone here? Would love some feedback if you have it.
And now from the “Things Which Sound Like Something On ’30 Rock’ But Are Actually Real” files: The Up Yer Pole pole dancing school in Scotland has begun offering classes for elementary schoolers ages six to 12. Up Yer Pole calls the lessons “pole fit” classes, alleging they are gymnastics classes with no sexual dancing and are open to both girls and boys.
As if these butt and boobs motorcycle helmets weren’t icky enough on their own, the boob helmet comes complete with a nipple piercing. Before seeing this particular piercing, we didn’t even know that nipple piercings could be particularly gaudy, we’d always though it was a standard ring sort of situation. Now we know better. One more NSFW pic after the jump… [Copyranter] Keep reading »
Newsflash! Ladies, your man doesn’t always want to hang out with your vagina. Sometimes the most erotic and exciting thing in the bedroom is your hand. No way, this can’t be true, you’re thinking. Aren’t handjobs for sleepaway camp and when I’m on antibiotics? Aren’t they passé like beepers and hotmail accounts? The short answer is NO. But lucky for you, I’m going to give you the long answer. Finally, someone will stand up to the powerful vagina lobbyists in Washington and explain how our nation got hoodwinked into thinking handjobs are lame. My theory is simple and, naturally, revolves around baseball and Benicio Del Toro. Keep reading »
Getting what you want out of your sex life can be extraordinarily difficult for the simple reason that there’s another human being involved (usually). Not many of us are gifted communicators, much less communicators of sexual wants and desires, who can be inoffensive and still get what we want; however, there are a few basic rules of expressing yourself sexually that you could all do with learning. Read more … Keep reading »
Poor dudes. Masturbation is just so messy. Once a dude is ready to blow, he’s forced to find a roll of toilet paper, box of tissues, or a sock to take care of the aftermath. Well, it’s time for men to save their Kleenex for the sniffles, stop using up all the TP, and leave their socks on. Now when he masturbates, he can simply wear a Man Bib! These handmade and machine washable bibs tie around the penis for one-size-fits-all convenience. Instead of having to leave the scene of the crime, he can masturbate and bask in the pleasure of having his clean team right there. Man Bibs come in camo for the hunter, denim for the cowboy, leather for the biker, tartan for the Scotsman, Studio55 for the metrosexual, and High School Musical for the one with a Peter Pan syndrome. [$25, TheCheeky.com] Keep reading »